I never want to cook another meal for the rest of my life

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You cook what you want to eat and the others eat or don't. That's how I feel. Many nights, I don't feel like eating dinner at all. I used to skip dinner a lot when I was younger because I'm always hungry in the morning but rarely at night. The idea that I have to put something on the table is exhausting.

OP - I would do that but then my kids would probably starve. They eat WAY more than I do (and they are only 5, 8 and 10 years old). I would feel bad making them skip dinner just because I hate eating/cooking food.

Unless your kids have sensory issues, they won't actually starve. Read Ellyn Satter. Serve kids good foods and if they choose not to eat that's fine. Don't give them snacks and move on to the next meal.

I've been doing this since my kids were tiny and they always get enough food. I do limit things they legitimately hate to rare so they have plenty of things we all enjoy. But it helps that they enjoy most (but not all) of what I enjoy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I used to love cooking and food. But since becoming a wife and mother I hate it. At this point I would prefer to just eat enough to survive and that's it. I hate it. My kids eat one thing, my husband is doing some super macro-intense food thing so makes his own food or I make up big batches for him and he portions them all out. This every day grind of making food has taken all the joy of food and eating out of me.

Unless my DH was reciprocating by helping me make and execute some kind of really specific diet, I would really resent being left alone to cook for and eat with the kids, and would resent the time, energy and kitchen space his whims were taking up.

I don't blame you at all.

My DH went through a phase when he was eating out for lunch every day at work and going to work dinners every night. It was really isolating to be just eating at home with the kids and having to either make two meals for every meal or watch in agony as they picked at whatever I had taken tons of time to plan and eat.

We had a houseguest last summer who was home for 3-4 meals a day and was training for the olympics so eating tons of food. Before they arrived, I was terrified by the amount of work I was anticipating. In the end, I was cooking constantly. And guess what? I actually had the best time, because they were incredibly enthusiastic about anything containing calories and were always willing to eat with me.

Eating should be social and I find that I get really burned out on cooking and eating if I'm doing either alone. Can you re-energize yourself by hosting or by having DH plan and cook meals for the two of you?

[Anonymous]

Definitely stop cooking anything for your husband. He's an adult; he can feed himself

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Definitely stop cooking anything for your husband. He's an adult; he can feed himself

I agree.

[Anonymous]

I only cook o ce every few weeks. Dinner is heating food up for the most part.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I used to love cooking and food. But since becoming a wife and mother I hate it. At this point I would prefer to just eat enough to survive and that's it. I hate it. My kids eat one thing, my husband is doing some super macro-intense food thing so makes his own food or I make up big batches for him and he portions them all out. This every day grind of making food has taken all the joy of food and eating out of me.

How old are your children?

[Anonymous]

LOL, you poor thing!

I feel the same way, but imagine this: my husband became severely disabled at about age 57 and can barely chew anymore, but still wants to eat "real food" not pureed.

So now as my kids are grown and flown and I should be able to relax the mealtime struggles and take turns with my husband, I am stuck cooking extra meals every day that he can eat, and no chance that he will cook for me instead.

I am So Flipping Tired of cooking. I dream of moving into a retirement community like where my own parents love some day soon and have them take over all the cooking for me.

[Anonymous]

I’ve been burned so many times cooking for kids. No one eats the same thing. Someone won’t eat….rice. Someone won’t eat….any potato.

I used to spend far too much effort, time and money cooking just to throw most of it away. I’ve stopped cooking for the most part since I keep plenty of food in the house which kids can make themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You cook what you want to eat and the others eat or don't. That's how I feel. Many nights, I don't feel like eating dinner at all. I used to skip dinner a lot when I was younger because I'm always hungry in the morning but rarely at night. The idea that I have to put something on the table is exhausting.

OP - I would do that but then my kids would probably starve. They eat WAY more than I do (and they are only 5, 8 and 10 years old). I would feel bad making them skip dinner just because I hate eating/cooking food.

Unless your kids have sensory issues, they won't actually starve. Read Ellyn Satter. Serve kids good foods and if they choose not to eat that's fine. Don't give them snacks and move on to the next meal.

I've been doing this since my kids were tiny and they always get enough food. I do limit things they legitimately hate to rare so they have plenty of things we all enjoy. But it helps that they enjoy most (but not all) of what I enjoy.

What happens when you make beans and rice and salad and a kid just eats the rice? And the next day there’s stew over egg noodles with broccoli and they just eat noodles? Ad infinitum? You just let them eat nothing but simple carbs for dinner every day?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been burned so many times cooking for kids. No one eats the same thing. Someone won’t eat….rice. Someone won’t eat….any potato.

I used to spend far too much effort, time and money cooking just to throw most of it away. I’ve stopped cooking for the most part since I keep plenty of food in the house which kids can make themselves.

I can’t wait to be able to move to this model. I still have one who is too young to make his own food. If i’m being 100% honest-if I would have known how depressing the food situation would be i’m not sure I would have ever gotten married or had kids at all. And i’m not being sarcastic. I love my family obviously but the food burden colors every single day. The only reason I look forward to vacations is because I don’t have to cook. Also, the time my husband suggested we get an airbnb on vacation so that we can save money and cook there instead-I told him to have fun, because I would not be going.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You cook what you want to eat and the others eat or don't. That's how I feel. Many nights, I don't feel like eating dinner at all. I used to skip dinner a lot when I was younger because I'm always hungry in the morning but rarely at night. The idea that I have to put something on the table is exhausting.

OP - I would do that but then my kids would probably starve. They eat WAY more than I do (and they are only 5, 8 and 10 years old). I would feel bad making them skip dinner just because I hate eating/cooking food.

10 is old enough to cook dinner, 8 is old enough to learn, 5 is old enough to help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:i am only cooking for two, but we have several days we are not home for dinner. i usually get a couple things ready in the fridge on sunday or monday and make things from that during the week when we are home.

for instance i might have a pound of cooked chicken. i can add some to a salad, make gyros or add some to a pasta. my husband doesn't care what we eat and i don't care enough to make a big effort. we always have something to eat.

if i had kids here i wouldn't have them eating chicken nuggets every night, though. i would cook actual food.

Yes literally everyone says that until they have kids. Just like everyone says they would handle tantrums perfectly and teach manners perfectly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You cook what you want to eat and the others eat or don't. That's how I feel. Many nights, I don't feel like eating dinner at all. I used to skip dinner a lot when I was younger because I'm always hungry in the morning but rarely at night. The idea that I have to put something on the table is exhausting.

OP - I would do that but then my kids would probably starve. They eat WAY more than I do (and they are only 5, 8 and 10 years old). I would feel bad making them skip dinner just because I hate eating/cooking food.

Unless your kids have sensory issues, they won't actually starve. Read Ellyn Satter. Serve kids good foods and if they choose not to eat that's fine. Don't give them snacks and move on to the next meal.

I've been doing this since my kids were tiny and they always get enough food. I do limit things they legitimately hate to rare so they have plenty of things we all enjoy. But it helps that they enjoy most (but not all) of what I enjoy.

What happens when you make beans and rice and salad and a kid just eats the rice? And the next day there’s stew over egg noodles with broccoli and they just eat noodles? Ad infinitum? You just let them eat nothing but simple carbs for dinner every day?

New poster but I also have picky kids with sensory issues and yea, basically we do this, for lunch (I pack their school lunches) I make sure it’s well balanced and something they each like- so, PB sandwich on wheat for one, and Greek yogurt for another, and both with lots of preferred fruits. So I know they’re getting protein and vitamins etc. And for dinner yeah if they only eat the dinner roll that’s fine. I do make sure that I make a meal now and then that they’ll both want to eat- like it’s fine to serve chicken tenders with rolls and a salad for dinner one night at home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:i am only cooking for two, but we have several days we are not home for dinner. i usually get a couple things ready in the fridge on sunday or monday and make things from that during the week when we are home.

for instance i might have a pound of cooked chicken. i can add some to a salad, make gyros or add some to a pasta. my husband doesn't care what we eat and i don't care enough to make a big effort. we always have something to eat.

if i had kids here i wouldn't have them eating chicken nuggets every night, though. i would cook actual food.

Yes literally everyone says that until they have kids. Just like everyone says they would handle tantrums perfectly and teach manners perfectly.

HAHAHA. Yes we were all perfect parents until we had kids. PP, it’s so easy to say you would do certain things when you are speaking in the hypothetical. When the reality is a child is throwing an absolute tantrum and you are exhausted you would be surprised how things change.

[Anonymous]

I'm getting that way, too.