DS says he doesn’t want to go to college

[Anonymous]

Time for him to support himself and see what he prefers.

Plumbers and electricians make quite a bit as do general contractors.

[Anonymous]

He might be right. My god-daughter dropped out from college and became an influencer in Miami. Financially she is doing a whole
lot better than her college grad peers!

[Anonymous]

OP, he can say it. You shouldn't plan in it, on anything other than college. We all need to vent. Maybe his schedule really is too hard. Is it sucking all the joy out of life?

[Anonymous]

Make sure a kid like this has a very early safety school nailed down. A rolling school. Apps open in Aug or Sept. He needs to feel the love from somewhere. Somewhere wants him. He'll then, in later months focus on other, a variety of choices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Going into a trade: okay reason to skip college (although I’d impress on your child that not having a degree will close some doors, especially if he wants to progress to management in a trade or if he decides he doesn’t want to work in a trade anymore).

Day trading, bitcoin, etc: not an acceptable reason to skip college.

+1

Friend's son knew from the time he hit high school that he wanted to be a mechanic for high-end cars. He and his family found a training program (and it was selective! Not anyone could just walk into this program) run by one of the highest-end car brands. He spent, I think, 18 months or two years JUST studying and getting hands-on experience through this full-time program. He can make great money now and loves what he does, but yes, he had to work very hard to get there in his trade.

Is your son that passionate about and focused on a trade, OP? If he's a junior right now, and he really means it re: a trade, well, he needs to start thinking about it now. Not after he finishes high school.

OP, unless your son is very serious about a trade, and is willing and able to do whatever training a trade takes, he's going to find that he's stuck in the lowest level jobs. I suspect he has no idea that trades require schooling too, sometimes quite a lot of it. And PP is right that for advancement, he may find that he can't get beyond a certain job level (and pay level) without a collee degree.

Agree with some above, who say that if he hasn't worked a basic service or labor type of job, he needs to do that. He may find out fast that he'd rather go to college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He might be right. My god-daughter dropped out from college and became an influencer in Miami. Financially she is doing a whole
lot better than her college grad peers!

But probably not for long. Influencing is really, really tough. It's a 24/7 job, you can't really break into big money, and it's a young person's job because after some years you're exhausted.

It's interesting how people like you still don't understand that education and degrees are supposed to preserve your earning potential until retirement age. The non-degreed jobs, unless you're incredibly driven and intelligent, don't often translate into becoming the owner of a successful business.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, he can say it. You shouldn't plan in it, on anything other than college. We all need to vent. Maybe his schedule really is too hard. Is it sucking all the joy out of life?

+1
My senior DS is burned out with all the college applications anxiety and keeping up the grades for 2 more weeks. Last semester he can slack off and live a life ...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He might be right. My god-daughter dropped out from college and became an influencer in Miami. Financially she is doing a whole
lot better than her college grad peers!

Saying this seriously and without snark, PP: I sincerely hope she is saving like crazy. She can't possibly know when her influencer gig will peter out, and if she's getting great money right now from, say, brand deals paying her to promote them, that's fine -- but she needs to be socking cash away and not touching it. And making a plan for what she moves on to, once her influencer days are over, or the influencer stuff slows down. I am not at all dissing being an influencer per se, but I'm noting that it's highly depending on whatever is current in social media, and that changes. I know there are people who get downright wealthy off it, and who do it for years, but those are the exceptions and not the rule.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Tell him not going to college is even harder than going to college, and that you'll need to see incredible drive and motivation from him in order to allow that to happen. You want to see a business plan for the next 10 years, with financial estimates on how he's planning to support himself and what sector of activity he's going to work/invest in, with what incremental goals for what incremental timeframes.

That should shut him up.

Yes, spreadsheets, projections, and progress reports are in order. Make sure he shows up on time for morning inspection and a weekly weigh-in as well.

j/k

[Anonymous]

Zuck never graduated from college.

He is worth $220 billion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DS is a junior in HS taking a tough load this year. He is saying he doesn’t want to go to college, it’s not worth it, etc. Says he can make $ trading stocks, going into a trade, or some other way. I fear this is a combo on burnout and TikTok influence. I would be fine with him going into a trade but he has never shown the slightest interest in any of them. Daytrading doesn’t seem like a sustainable strategy. Thoughts? Similar experiences? Clearly, a summer job is in order so he gets what it is to work.

There's still time for him to change his mind. Mine had no interest in college and exerted his efforts figuring out an alternative just to avoid it. Was thinking of enlisting in the military. We told him he can enlist if he wants, but do 2 years community college first. He agreed. After one year, he transferred to a 4-year university because he wants to enter the military at higher officer pay instead of enlisted pay.

You say your son is taking a tough load this year. This may be the impetus for his current thoughts about college. He just may be feeling overwhelmed or exhausted. I'd suggest focusing him on two things:

1. College load can feel less than a tough high school load - schedules aren't 8 - 3 five days a week; probably a lot more reading, though mostly fewer but "bigger" graded assignments; doesn't have to take 20 credit hours every semester; etc.

2. Having a college degree will help if he needs a plan B or ultimately decides he doesn't enjoy day-trading. it isn't all about money.

If he can get a decent, career-oriented job out of high school, then nothing wrong with him giving it a go. After a year or two, he'll either love it and thrive; or he'll decide he wants to go to college to figure something else out. It isn't hte end of the world if a kid doesn't immediately go to college. We all have our own journeys.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS is a junior in HS taking a tough load this year. He is saying he doesn’t want to go to college, it’s not worth it, etc. Says he can make $ trading stocks, going into a trade, or some other way. I fear this is a combo on burnout and TikTok influence. I would be fine with him going into a trade but he has never shown the slightest interest in any of them. Daytrading doesn’t seem like a sustainable strategy. Thoughts? Similar experiences? Clearly, a summer job is in order so he gets what it is to work.

Has he made any money trading stocks? if your family has money, I really don't see the point of going to college.

To become an educated person.
To explore interests.
To live semi-independently before living independently and mature.
To pursue a pathway of personal and financial independence and not be beholden to mommy and daddy.
(What if the family money is lost in the future? or you get cut out of the will?)
Future earning potential is not the sole point of college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS is a junior in HS taking a tough load this year. He is saying he doesn’t want to go to college, it’s not worth it, etc. Says he can make $ trading stocks, going into a trade, or some other way. I fear this is a combo on burnout and TikTok influence. I would be fine with him going into a trade but he has never shown the slightest interest in any of them. Daytrading doesn’t seem like a sustainable strategy. Thoughts? Similar experiences? Clearly, a summer job is in order so he gets what it is to work.

Your DS is right. Unfortunately, upwardly mobile parents can’t stand to not have their kids go to college, even if it’s not in their kid’s best interests.

+1

[Anonymous]

He might not fully understand what college is and might just think of it as an extention of high school as opposed to a place you can find yourself in an intellectually rich environment. I would help him understand what it takes to learn a trade, but also keep options open for college.

I say this as someone who also decided I wasn't going to college. As a would be first gen student, no one ever really explained what it was all about, and didn't try to talk me into it. I sometimes wish they did. So I joined the military, then went to college, and maybe even got more out of it that way.

[Anonymous]

Cut him off as soon as he graduates from HS. Give him 3-6 months to move out on his own and get a job. Let him experience what life is like for those without a college degree. Yes, I know some trades make money, but being uneducated really limits ones options in life and is unrefined.