10th grader with no interesting ECs, top grades and scores

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DS is a 10th grader at a suburban public. He is in all AP and Honors courses and a straight-A student. Just got back from PSAT and was in the 98th percentile without prep. He is a smart kid but seems to have no interests or EC that will make a different. He is on the golf team, and that's all he really does at school, and he isn't a great golfer/won't be recruited. I am trying to figure out how to make him interested in college apps and start to develop a passion or interest in general. Summer after 9th grade he did nothing. He wants to go to a place like MIT or an ivy, and that just won't happen even with good ECs of which he has none. I mentioned this to my friend who works at a top DC private and she bluntly said, well he will get into a school like UMD or BC/BU if he is lucky. I was taken aback as this is a kid who is at the top of his grade and views himself as "better than" a school like UMD or a 40/50 school like BC or BU. He won't be hooked for admissions anywhere, aside from us being full pay which I know is not a hook but she said it can make a difference at some SLAC. What do I do??????????

Full pay won't help much at the very top SLACs. Those schools are richer than most T20 schools for the number of students they have. However, there are some very good SLACs a bit farther down the rankings where full pay could help.

[Anonymous]

I don’t really understand your dilemma—is it that you’re trying to figure out how to let him down easily or how to make him suddenly develop some impressive passion? The former is a whole lot easier. Just say “Sorry, kid, MIT or an Ivy just isn’t happening. Feel free to apply, but let’s take a look at some schools where you have a realistic shot…”

[Anonymous]

Your son sounds like a smart and hard working kid. It is important to do some activities so the activities section isn't empty on applications. It is good if you can focus on an area of interest and get good at that. But it is most important to just have something. Other posters have made good suggestions.

[Anonymous]

Coach little kids in golf

Get a job at a golf course as a caddy or in the pro shop

Work at a mini golf place

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Coach little kids in golf

Get a job at a golf course as a caddy or in the pro shop

Work at a mini golf place

I like these!

[Anonymous]

Let him be. don’t try to package or cultivate him in some fake way. Let the chips fall where they may. If it happens to be a top school down the road, then great. If not, there’s a whole big world of great places and opportunity outside T-25. You want him to have strong coping skills and a genuine sense of self, no matter where he ends up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DS is a 10th grader at a suburban public. He is in all AP and Honors courses and a straight-A student. Just got back from PSAT and was in the 98th percentile without prep. He is a smart kid but seems to have no interests or EC that will make a different. He is on the golf team, and that's all he really does at school, and he isn't a great golfer/won't be recruited. I am trying to figure out how to make him interested in college apps and start to develop a passion or interest in general. Summer after 9th grade he did nothing. He wants to go to a place like MIT or an ivy, and that just won't happen even with good ECs of which he has none. I mentioned this to my friend who works at a top DC private and she bluntly said, well he will get into a school like UMD or BC/BU if he is lucky. I was taken aback as this is a kid who is at the top of his grade and views himself as "better than" a school like UMD or a 40/50 school like BC or BU. He won't be hooked for admissions anywhere, aside from us being full pay which I know is not a hook but she said it can make a difference at some SLAC. What do I do??????????

Your son is your son; he is who he is--don't try to make him into someone he is not.

He seems somewhat unmotivated, therefore Ivy League schools and MIT are unrealistic reaches.

Full-pay should make a difference at LACs beyond the highest ranked schools (Williams, Amherst, Swarthmore, Pomona).

There are dozens of outstanding colleges and universities which are realistic targets for your son. Relax & let him be himself.

[Anonymous]

Why those schools?
Students who thrive in those environments embrace all aspects of learning and are not held back by necessary tedium.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would suggest a well chosen summer camp/program/etc. that could align with a choice of major or area of focus. Even if it looks a little "pay to play" it could give vocational insight.

I would let your kid know that the lack of ECs is making him uncompetitive for top schools and that's his choice.

But he will probably be able to excel at a state flagship if he's a good student.

I would recommend you have him watch Youtube videos about schools that aren't the usual suspects (not Ivy, not UMD). Ask him to pick out some schools to take a closer look at over the next two years. Find out why he picks the ones he does.

I always recommend Pitt. It's my undergrad alma mater. You can go anywhere for grad school with a Pitt degree and high GPA.

He wants MIT and you are recommending #70 U of Pitt? We only use Pitt as a last safety on our list.

[Anonymous]

I don’t want to burst your bubble, but it really is not hard to have a 4.0 as a sophomore in MCPS. And if he is only taking honors and AP, that probably just means he isn’t taking PE this semester.

I have a 10th grader in MCPS right now with similar stats. He is also a minority, plays a sport, has a job, has leadership, shows commitment to his area of interest, and has an interesting personal story. He is not likely to go to an ivy because I can think of 50 kids in his grade that are likely smarter, more focused, or more motivated than he is. And of those 50, hardly any of them will get into an Ivy.

I’d encourage you that you shouldn’t overthink your kids one good standardized test score. It is a good sign, but not a setup to an ivy.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like another troll. PSAT was in the 98%? No, people would say, PSAT was a ____[score].

Get a job, like your make believe son.

[Anonymous]

DCUM tends to overestimate the types of ECs necessary for top college admission. Activities are not awards.

It's not about what the ECs are. It's about what you put into it - initiative taken - and what you get out of it - self-development.

OP, junior year is prime time for ECs. Let your kid follow their interests. Insist that they do something. If all else fails, get a summer job.

[Anonymous]

Why do YOU need to do anything?

This is the switching point, OP. When kids are younger, you as parent, get to control their time. But, when they are in HS, it switches and THEY control their time and effort. I totally get how distressing it is to know that other kids are making themselves more competitive for colleges. But, this is not something you can control. You can offer and inform your kid about options, but they get to choose their own adventure.

My kids were not into ECs. Very different from how I grew up and what I wanted. My kids don't care about stats and competing. That is who they are and that's THEIR journey. You cannot give them the motivation to be who YOU want them to be. They will follow their own ideas about what is important, on their own timeline.

Accept that it's OK to go to whatever college. This is the key to sanity for parents of high schoolers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Coach little kids in golf

Get a job at a golf course as a caddy or in the pro shop

Work at a mini golf place

these...and maybe do some independent research that relates to golf somehow? Or an internship with a golf-related business (if that's what he wants to do - business?)

What is the major??

[Anonymous]

gap year for an interesting EC