Very confused, and very in need of opinions: How do I find a church?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm so glad you posted this. After not having been to church in 10 years, after the birth of my daughter I went to my catholic church to get her baptized and was turned away because I didn't have paperwork of my being catholic. So I'm church shopping too! It seems weird, picking a faith.

Anyone want to recommend one?

Where ever you were Baptized has all of your paper work on being Catholic. Within the Catholic Church, your baptismal record has the record of all of your sacraments - when you received communion, confirmation, marriage. This is how the church has historically managed records.

that was the point, I had been going to church with my grandmother as a child (catholic) always considered myself catholic but wasn't baptized. Suddenly, I'm not catholic anymore. I guess since I haven't been in years I shouldn't care....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Try Unitarian or Unity. Best bet is to attend churches and see which one speaks to you. Pray about this and you will receive an answer. There is also Foundry United Methodist Church on 16th St., in DC, which is inclusive and also has a excellent children, young adult, couples ministry. Good luck and God bless.

Thanks- I will check this out too!

[Anonymous]

I just want to give you some words of encouragement, OP.
I was... think I still am... in your shoes. I was raised Methodist by a very sprititual family, and I find myself at odds with their dogma. And yet I can't shake myself to get out of the Christian church.
So my Catholic-raised husband (also inherently unable to leave the Christian church) found a very welcoming and family friendly Methodist church within walking distance of our home (meets 2 important criteria - family friendly and walkable). We joined, recently baptized DD there, and although I have doubts about my faith, I am happy we have become a member of a moral-based community.

But the main thing I wanted to pass along was the comment the minister gave to me upon my joining. I explained some doubts I had about the church and Christianity as a whole, that I am fearful of hypocrisy to my family and the community, that I don't want to be labeled, etc., and he replied, 'you don't join a gym because you're in shape.'

I found this to be comforting. Mind you, we all need to maintain our own identity, but I just want to remind you that there are warm and eager congegrations out there that want to give your family love and support. (You just need to figure out which one you want to join!)

Good luck in your search.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm so glad you posted this. After not having been to church in 10 years, after the birth of my daughter I went to my catholic church to get her baptized and was turned away because I didn't have paperwork of my being catholic. So I'm church shopping too! It seems weird, picking a faith.

Anyone want to recommend one?

Not every Catholic Church is like this, you should try Holy Trinity in G'town. And the church where you were baptised as a child (if you were) should be able to provide you with your baptismal certificate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just want to give you some words of encouragement, OP.
'you don't join a gym because you're in shape.'

I think the fear of judgement has had me stalled for a long time. Your post expressed very similar feelings and prior experiences. Thank you for the encouragement, and sharing the idea that that I can find someplace that will help me along my journey.

[Anonymous]

I'd also try Unitarian/Universalist. There's a book that gives a basic overview:
http://www.amazon.com/Chosen-Faith-Introduction-Unitarian-Universalism/dp/0807016179/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1282917152&sr=8-1

I've looked into a UU church near me but haven't gone yet. (DH is Catholic, I'm agnostic, and I think a combination of Catholic and UU might be what I want for our daughter when she gets older. FWIW, if you consider Catholic, you should know that different dioceses around here are very different--Arlington is more conservative than DC, for example.)

[Anonymous]

Do you have any friends who really love their church? Go with them a few times and see if you like it.

Finding a church is hard work. You really have to go a couple times to get a good feel... you might go on a day when they have a guest pastor, or whatever...

I personally love my church. I feel so lucky to have found it. I don't think I have the mental energy to do a lot of church-shopping.

Good luck.

[Anonymous]

The LDS church has a great kids program and is VERY family oriented. If you are exploring, it's one worth looking into. Also tends to be very welcoming and helpful to new people. http://www.mormon.org/

[Anonymous]

Here are my thoughts: first, start asking your friends about the churches they attend, what they are like, and whether or not you would potentially fit in (ie are the churches conservative/liberal, open to newcomers, formal/casual, etc). Then start shopping around.

Most churches will be very welcoming - ALL churches want new members! There are obviously hundreds and thousands of churches in the area, all denominations. I think you definitely need to try some out to make a choice like that and a good way to do is ask around to friends and others you are close to.

On that note, have to recommend my church, New York Avenue Presbyterian, as one that is very open-minded and welcoming to people from all walks of life and varying spiritual paths.... The children's program is not huge as urban churches tend to draw fewer families, but well run by loving people.

[Anonymous]

Try to find a UCC/Congregational church. They are quite liberal, inclusive, non-judgemental. They were one of the first to allow openly gay men and women to become ministers. We belong to the Presbyterian church, which is similar to UCC, but a little less liberal. DH was raised Catholic and I was raised in the UCC church. However, we just moved and are church shopping, and it's very difficult to find the right combination we seek. You have to visit a lot of churches to find the right community and "fit." And yes, I always contribute a few dollars to the offering plate when it comes around. Not to do so seems wrong to me. Look for a well-organized children's program because that's very important. UCC teaches all about other religions and does not point fingers at sins and sinners. It's all about trying to live a Christian life, as they define it. I think that's a good thing whether or not you believe that Jesus is the son of God or that God created the Earth. And children need the security of faith in God, the knowledge that they have a protector, even if that belief fades as they get older. I don't want my children to hit a spiritual crisis and suddenly want faith in their lives so they grab onto some fundamentalist or crazy Moonie religion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: And children need the security of faith in God, the knowledge that they have a protector, even if that belief fades as they get older. I don't want my children to hit a spiritual crisis and suddenly want faith in their lives so they grab onto some fundamentalist or crazy Moonie religion.

I think some of this is at the heart of what I'm feeling. I want to make sure they have the option to choose faith. There is no way for them to do that in our current situation.

[Anonymous]

Episcopalian, IMO. It has more of a church feel than Unitarian, but is very inclusive and liberal in thought (meaning you can interpret scripture the way you want without (much) judgment.

I was about to write almost exactly this.

I wound up at a liberal Episcopalian Church after doing a bit of church-shopping. My husband and I just went to different services at area churches until we found a place where we were comfortable with both the religious attitudes and the people in the congregation. We tried out Catholic churches (I grew up Catholic, but didn't particularly want to go back - too conservative and judgmental), Methodist (his childhood religion, not formal enough for me), Unitarian (incredibly nice people, but we wanted more guidance re: God), and finally clicked at a wonderful Episcopalian church. There is no judgement, and most people in the pews have left other religions because they didn't like the politics or whatever.

[Anonymous]

I was raised Catholic and became a Universalist about a year ago. I love it! It totally jibes with my liberal values. And we have a real church, with a real sanctuary, and sometimes they talk about.... Jesus! Or Budda... or the Goddess. That's what is awesome about it.

[Anonymous]

Try Capitol Hill Methodist Church. It's very inclusive and welcoming. The Pastor is great.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You might be interested in trying the "belief-o-matic."

http://www.beliefnet.com/Entertainment/Quizzes/BeliefOMatic.aspx

It's light-hearted, as the name implies, but I think the results can be pretty interesting.

We had more of a sense of the denominations that we were wanted to try, but we still did quite a bit of "church shopping." I find that a visit to a church for a Sunday service can be very enlightening--sometimes inspirational, and sometimes making it clear that I'm not interested in that particular church! Even within a single denomination, church communities can vary quiet a bit.

I loved this! And I turned up Unitarian Universalist as I expected- does anyone know what a "Liberal Quaker" is? that was my 95% result...