Would you apply to a school that you know you can't afford?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Donut family = makes too much to qualify for aid but too little to comfortably afford $50k/year tuition.

What is "comfortably" afford? It should not be comfortable for all to afford $57,000 per year. That is the issue. People want a luxury item but do not want to give anything up. Many can afford it and not give anything up but many should not and should have to sacrifice to attend. You realize $57,000 is. more than the average family makes in the US?

Where do you think financial aid comes from? Just curious? It comes from donations from parents like us that are paying full tuition plus giving an extra $5-$10,000 more per year but in order to do that we are cutting back on some things. Maybe not a larger home or something else.

Not sure why you’re ranting at me about the definition, we are full pay, and we scrape to do it. I’m just answering the question about a donut family. There are people who don’t qualify for aid and cannot rearrange their finances to afford private school. That’s what a donut family is. You don’t have to approve of their choices, it’s not about you.

Post is directed at OP and at anyone that is concerned with comfortably affording private school tuition. The term comfortable comes up often. Comments directed at anyone that thinks it should be comfortable for all. Take it or leave it.

You sound like such a pleasant person. Don’t give the $5-10k extra if you’re so bitter about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Donut family = makes too much to qualify for aid but too little to comfortably afford $50k/year tuition.

What is "comfortably" afford? It should not be comfortable for all to afford $57,000 per year. That is the issue. People want a luxury item but do not want to give anything up. Many can afford it and not give anything up but many should not and should have to sacrifice to attend. You realize $57,000 is. more than the average family makes in the US?

Where do you think financial aid comes from? Just curious? It comes from donations from parents like us that are paying full tuition plus giving an extra $5-$10,000 more per year but in order to do that we are cutting back on some things. Maybe not a larger home or something else.

Not sure why you’re ranting at me about the definition, we are full pay, and we scrape to do it. I’m just answering the question about a donut family. There are people who don’t qualify for aid and cannot rearrange their finances to afford private school. That’s what a donut family is. You don’t have to approve of their choices, it’s not about you.

Post is directed at OP and at anyone that is concerned with comfortably affording private school tuition. The term comfortable comes up often. Comments directed at anyone that thinks it should be comfortable for all. Take it or leave it.

You sound like such a pleasant person. Don’t give the $5-10k extra if you’re so bitter about it.

Seriously. The school sets the policy. We support the school.

Some schools think you should be willing to sacrifice tremendously to afford private school. Other schools think you shouldn’t. We choose the school and play by their rules.

[Anonymous]

Are there possibly any scholarships DS could test/apply for? My DS received such a scholarship from our school of choice, which - although not 100%- took enough off of the top to become more palatable to us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Donut family = makes too much to qualify for aid but too little to comfortably afford $50k/year tuition.

What is "comfortably" afford? It should not be comfortable for all to afford $57,000 per year. That is the issue. People want a luxury item but do not want to give anything up. Many can afford it and not give anything up but many should not and should have to sacrifice to attend. You realize $57,000 is. more than the average family makes in the US?

Where do you think financial aid comes from? Just curious? It comes from donations from parents like us that are paying full tuition plus giving an extra $5-$10,000 more per year but in order to do that we are cutting back on some things. Maybe not a larger home or something else.

Not sure why you’re ranting at me about the definition, we are full pay, and we scrape to do it. I’m just answering the question about a donut family. There are people who don’t qualify for aid and cannot rearrange their finances to afford private school. That’s what a donut family is. You don’t have to approve of their choices, it’s not about you.

Post is directed at OP and at anyone that is concerned with comfortably affording private school tuition. The term comfortable comes up often. Comments directed at anyone that thinks it should be comfortable for all. Take it or leave it.

OP here. Do you live in a two bedroom apartment? I do. Do you drive a 2014 Honda Civic? I do. Perhaps "comfort" was the wrong word. I am worried about not being able to afford the health/long term care I need when I can no longer work. I am worried about not being able to afford college. Those are the impacts of paying too much tuition that I am concerned with. We already live a pretty slimmed down lifestyle. Guests sleep in the living room and we never eat out......so I'm not sure where the money could actually come from.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Donut family = makes too much to qualify for aid but too little to comfortably afford $50k/year tuition.

What is "comfortably" afford? It should not be comfortable for all to afford $57,000 per year. That is the issue. People want a luxury item but do not want to give anything up. Many can afford it and not give anything up but many should not and should have to sacrifice to attend. You realize $57,000 is. more than the average family makes in the US?

Where do you think financial aid comes from? Just curious? It comes from donations from parents like us that are paying full tuition plus giving an extra $5-$10,000 more per year but in order to do that we are cutting back on some things. Maybe not a larger home or something else.

1000%. Exactly.

Same when one applies to a dozen colleges they cannot afford (or do not want to pay for) and then chase down merit $$.

That money comes from current full pay families and a large volume of donors. Endowments are typically restricted/earmarked and are not used as basic operating funds to provide thousands of $$ in general merit (vs. named scholars programs).

So yes apply OP, but please set realistic expectations for your kids and look at how your hh budget can be tightened and/or income increased.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Donut family = makes too much to qualify for aid but too little to comfortably afford $50k/year tuition.

What is "comfortably" afford? It should not be comfortable for all to afford $57,000 per year. That is the issue. People want a luxury item but do not want to give anything up. Many can afford it and not give anything up but many should not and should have to sacrifice to attend. You realize $57,000 is. more than the average family makes in the US?

Where do you think financial aid comes from? Just curious? It comes from donations from parents like us that are paying full tuition plus giving an extra $5-$10,000 more per year but in order to do that we are cutting back on some things. Maybe not a larger home or something else.

Not sure why you’re ranting at me about the definition, we are full pay, and we scrape to do it. I’m just answering the question about a donut family. There are people who don’t qualify for aid and cannot rearrange their finances to afford private school. That’s what a donut family is. You don’t have to approve of their choices, it’s not about you.

Post is directed at OP and at anyone that is concerned with comfortably affording private school tuition. The term comfortable comes up often. Comments directed at anyone that thinks it should be comfortable for all. Take it or leave it.

OP here. Do you live in a two bedroom apartment? I do. Do you drive a 2014 Honda Civic? I do. Perhaps "comfort" was the wrong word. I am worried about not being able to afford the health/long term care I need when I can no longer work. I am worried about not being able to afford college. Those are the impacts of paying too much tuition that I am concerned with. We already live a pretty slimmed down lifestyle. Guests sleep in the living room and we never eat out......so I'm not sure where the money could actually come from.

Public school, free to all, may then be your answer.

[Anonymous]

Dear God no. I hate draining money and living beyond my means. It’s embarrassing and pathetic.

[Anonymous]

Is college totally saved for already? And your retirement on track? If not, I wouldn’t.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Donut family = makes too much to qualify for aid but too little to comfortably afford $50k/year tuition.

What is "comfortably" afford? It should not be comfortable for all to afford $57,000 per year. That is the issue. People want a luxury item but do not want to give anything up. Many can afford it and not give anything up but many should not and should have to sacrifice to attend. You realize $57,000 is. more than the average family makes in the US?

Where do you think financial aid comes from? Just curious? It comes from donations from parents like us that are paying full tuition plus giving an extra $5-$10,000 more per year but in order to do that we are cutting back on some things. Maybe not a larger home or something else.

1000%. Exactly.

Same when one applies to a dozen colleges they cannot afford (or do not want to pay for) and then chase down merit $$.

That money comes from current full pay families and a large volume of donors. Endowments are typically restricted/earmarked and are not used as basic operating funds to provide thousands of $$ in general merit (vs. named scholars programs).

So yes apply OP, but please set realistic expectations for your kids and look at how your hh budget can be tightened and/or income increased.

The thing is the money is there and the schools are allocating it towards aid. Merit at college exists to make the student profile look better. Even at the high school level, schools give aid to kids who do great on entry tests (especially some Catholic High Schools) and who are great at certain sports. If you don't like it, find schools whose view on aid aligns with yours

[Anonymous]

I went into it with the hope that colleges would want my kid, and would make an attractive offer. Many acceptances and all made offers, some much better than others. I set an amount I was willing to pay and told them that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Donut family = makes too much to qualify for aid but too little to comfortably afford $50k/year tuition.

What is "comfortably" afford? It should not be comfortable for all to afford $57,000 per year. That is the issue. People want a luxury item but do not want to give anything up. Many can afford it and not give anything up but many should not and should have to sacrifice to attend. You realize $57,000 is. more than the average family makes in the US?

Where do you think financial aid comes from? Just curious? It comes from donations from parents like us that are paying full tuition plus giving an extra $5-$10,000 more per year but in order to do that we are cutting back on some things. Maybe not a larger home or something else.

Not sure why you’re ranting at me about the definition, we are full pay, and we scrape to do it. I’m just answering the question about a donut family. There are people who don’t qualify for aid and cannot rearrange their finances to afford private school. That’s what a donut family is. You don’t have to approve of their choices, it’s not about you.

Post is directed at OP and at anyone that is concerned with comfortably affording private school tuition. The term comfortable comes up often. Comments directed at anyone that thinks it should be comfortable for all. Take it or leave it.

OP here. Do you live in a two bedroom apartment? I do. Do you drive a 2014 Honda Civic? I do. Perhaps "comfort" was the wrong word. I am worried about not being able to afford the health/long term care I need when I can no longer work. I am worried about not being able to afford college. Those are the impacts of paying too much tuition that I am concerned with. We already live a pretty slimmed down lifestyle. Guests sleep in the living room and we never eat out......so I'm not sure where the money could actually come from.

.

I asked one school if they expected to us to stop saving for retirement (or anything else) before applying for aid and the answer was yes so we went public school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Donut family = makes too much to qualify for aid but too little to comfortably afford $50k/year tuition.

What is "comfortably" afford? It should not be comfortable for all to afford $57,000 per year. That is the issue. People want a luxury item but do not want to give anything up. Many can afford it and not give anything up but many should not and should have to sacrifice to attend. You realize $57,000 is. more than the average family makes in the US?

Where do you think financial aid comes from? Just curious? It comes from donations from parents like us that are paying full tuition plus giving an extra $5-$10,000 more per year but in order to do that we are cutting back on some things. Maybe not a larger home or something else.

1000%. Exactly.

Same when one applies to a dozen colleges they cannot afford (or do not want to pay for) and then chase down merit $$.

That money comes from current full pay families and a large volume of donors. Endowments are typically restricted/earmarked and are not used as basic operating funds to provide thousands of $$ in general merit (vs. named scholars programs).

So yes apply OP, but please set realistic expectations for your kids and look at how your hh budget can be tightened and/or income increased.

The thing is the money is there and the schools are allocating it towards aid. Merit at college exists to make the student profile look better. Even at the high school level, schools give aid to kids who do great on entry tests (especially some Catholic High Schools) and who are great at certain sports. If you don't like it, find schools whose view on aid aligns with yours

+1. Only on DCUM have I ever encountered this entitlement from people who want to have a say over what an institution does with the money and are bitter when they think the money doesn’t go to the “right” people.

[Anonymous]

Which school is it OP? There are DC schools that will give $5k max at that income and schools that will give $30k+. Financial aid budgets and awards vary WILDLY--even among Big3 schools.

I would not apply to one of the former-not fair to your kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There is a high school nearby us that is a GREAT fit for DS and pretty confident that he can get in and will be a strong candidate. But tuition is $57K and we are probably a donut family. $275K in HHI. While we feel we can afford up to $30K for tuition, we really don't think $57K is at all doable for four years of high school. (Not without raiding the college fund or stopping retirement savings both of which seems like a bad direction to move into).

Would it be worth going through the admissions process just to see if we can get financial aid? But what if DS becomes very attached to the school and then we do not get financial aid?

DS is currently in 8th at a K-8 so we are looking at a variety of options.

You can afford it on $275k HHI, you just don't want to rearrange spending to account for $57k a year in tuition. You admit you *can* do it if you slow your retirement savings or raid college savings... neither of which you sound willing to do. Just because you don't want to do those things doesn't mean you should qualify to get money that full-pay families donate for true FA families.

Now, of course you could apply and submit the FA forms but be prepared to be denied aid if you get in. The crossroads being when your DC is upset that they can't go to this great school they worked so hard to get into that you talked up as the perfect fit (tours, shadow days, interviews, essays, placement tests).

OR you make the choice to not save in other areas and fund it.

OR you apply only to privates you can afford.

No one here would qualify for FA with that HHI (not in DC, another large major metro with expensive private schools).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is a high school nearby us that is a GREAT fit for DS and pretty confident that he can get in and will be a strong candidate. But tuition is $57K and we are probably a donut family. $275K in HHI. While we feel we can afford up to $30K for tuition, we really don't think $57K is at all doable for four years of high school. (Not without raiding the college fund or stopping retirement savings both of which seems like a bad direction to move into).

Would it be worth going through the admissions process just to see if we can get financial aid? But what if DS becomes very attached to the school and then we do not get financial aid?

DS is currently in 8th at a K-8 so we are looking at a variety of options.

You can afford it on $275k HHI, you just don't want to rearrange spending to account for $57k a year in tuition. You admit you *can* do it if you slow your retirement savings or raid college savings... neither of which you sound willing to do. Just because you don't want to do those things doesn't mean you should qualify to get money that full-pay families donate for true FA families.

Now, of course you could apply and submit the FA forms but be prepared to be denied aid if you get in. The crossroads being when your DC is upset that they can't go to this great school they worked so hard to get into that you talked up as the perfect fit (tours, shadow days, interviews, essays, placement tests).

OR you make the choice to not save in other areas and fund it.

OR you apply only to privates you can afford.

No one here would qualify for FA with that HHI (not in DC, another large major metro with expensive private schools).

There is a very good chance OP will get decent aid despite you thinking it improper