Public speaking incident

[Anonymous]

Sounds like your speech really resonated and you can safely ignore him. There may or may not be areas you can improve on, (almost everyone has some), but a trusted peer or mentor is a much better resource to get constructive feedback.

[Anonymous]

Did he kind of sneer as he walked away?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just consider what kind of person you'd have to be - how unkind, socially awkward, inappropriate - to say something like that to a stranger. And then ask yourself if the opinions of such a person are worth your consideration.

F that guy. He sucks.

+1. I've seen talks that weren't great (and given talks that weren't great). This is so out of the range of normal behavior that it only reflects on him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For my job, I often have to speak in front of large crowds and I have become quite comfortable at it. I recently gave a speech in a conference in front of 400+ people. Personally, I thought that I killed it. I was not nervous, felt super confident and thought it went marvelously. Afterwards, multiple people approached me to tell me how amazing and inspiring the speech was, and how great the delivery was. Not sure it matters, but I'm a 40s woman in a very senior role with my company. The next day at the same conference, and older man (65 - 70?) whom I've never met in my life approached me apropos of nothing and told me something along the following lines: "You shouldn't read your speech. You looked and sounded nervous. In fact, it reminded me of when I saw a kid give a speech in my 11th grade class. It was the same. You looked so uncomfortable up there." I have zero idea who this guy was, except that he was another attendee at the conference. I just walked away and didn't respond.

What the hell what that all about!?

SEXISM

I used to be a litigator and in my first jury trial there were two guys in the jury pool that were just really unpleasant. Dirty looks, rude tone when answering my questions, etc. My male colleague with a good bit of trial experience was there to mentor me through the process. During the break where you choose which jurors to strike he told me those two guys clearly had something against me because I was a woman and I needed to use two strikes on them. I hadn't experienced much sexism at that point in my life. But once he told me that it was like a light bulb went on.

This old dude just didn't like the fact that you were up there giving a speech because you are a woman. Nothing more. Nothing less.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You should watch a video of yourself speaking.

+1. Often we're the best judges of our own performance, but you only notice certain things by watching the video. I really never trust what others tell me about my public speaking.

[Anonymous]

Old man is gonna old man. Ignore and sail on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He's old and probably got you confused with another speaker in a dress.

This is believable to me.

GenX woman

[Anonymous]

Did you read the speech?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For my job, I often have to speak in front of large crowds and I have become quite comfortable at it. I recently gave a speech in a conference in front of 400+ people. Personally, I thought that I killed it. I was not nervous, felt super confident and thought it went marvelously. Afterwards, multiple people approached me to tell me how amazing and inspiring the speech was, and how great the delivery was. Not sure it matters, but I'm a 40s woman in a very senior role with my company. The next day at the same conference, and older man (65 - 70?) whom I've never met in my life approached me apropos of nothing and told me something along the following lines: "You shouldn't read your speech. You looked and sounded nervous. In fact, it reminded me of when I saw a kid give a speech in my 11th grade class. It was the same. You looked so uncomfortable up there." I have zero idea who this guy was, except that he was another attendee at the conference. I just walked away and didn't respond.

What the hell what that all about!?

This guy is trying to bring your confidence down. Don't let him! If he isn't your supervisor than he is a 'paper doll' and let him blow away. I am sure you crushed it!

[Anonymous]

This reminds me of the time an older man lectured me on a plane about why I should always stow my carry on across from me instead of on top of me to not slow up the de-boarding process. As if there is much choice when you are boarding in row 25. What an ass.

In your case if you feel confident and that it went well I believe you. But experience says people also sometimes over-flatter people who had a rough time. I mean, watch a video but 99% chance that guy was just a weirdo.

[Anonymous]

Ask when he is presenting.

[Anonymous]

In the words of a smart congresswoman, you could say:

"I didn't ask you a question."

See 5:22.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kP_o_0MZZpU