HS parents

[Anonymous]

I help one kid a lot and one kid barely ever. I will say because I have needed to be very involved for my older kid (and we found an executive functioning coach wasn't worth it), I have learned a lot.

Some teachers are incredibly organized and dedicated, but this year we are dealing with an example of one who lies. A handful of kids just dropped it because it is hard to navigate someone like this. She posts the wrong notes. She posts all these assignments with due dates that are wrong. She also posts all these assignments that cannot be accessed and then replies with a condescending email to pay attention to directions. Low and behold she just deletes the ones that cannot be accessed or changes the due date after the email. She gaslights and implies DD isn't following directions.We shut that down by having her take screenshots and superimpose a circle on the problematic assignment and due dates. Now the teacher says "thank you for pointing the mistake. I have changed it." There is no way my kid would have figured out to do that without our coaching. Plus, if a kid starts getting low grades and you have a meeting, if you don't follow what the teacher is up to, it's easy for the teacher to blame it all on your kid. Easier to figure out the situation and help out kid address it without accusing the teacher of gaslighting.

[Anonymous]

I have a 9th grader and we haven't helped with any homework/studying this year or in middle school except for one math unit in 8th grade that he was having trouble with. I check in every couple of days with a "do you have any homework or studying you need to do?" but don't get more specific than that. I receive the grade reports every week from SIS and as long as his grade are reasonable and assignments are turned in (which they always have been), I let him handle it. I think it's important for them to be independent if able.

I also, though, would not let a 14 year old crash and burn without getting involved, so if that's the situation, then, yes, I'd be helping in some way. Setting up tutoring, making sure he is communicating with his teachers well, helping with homework or studying if I'm able, etc.

Every kid is different.