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It's also about their management expectation. I have one who really busted ass for all of high school and wants the prestigious school and yes, we said all the right things the whole way to make it clear this wasn't the be all, end all and to set expectations that so many variables are out of his control, a good fit is what matters, there are so many fantastic places to go to college. In they end, they hear it from their peers and the world around them and some kids are very internally motivated. To know a kid like this will have done their absolute best and most likely end up disappointed is a tough pill to swallow.
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| Completely agree. My B student will have so many choices. She is happy to stay in-state, but also there are tons of OOS schools that could be good fits. She will do TO, take easier courses, and it will all be fine. |
I hear you! I am going through this with my second, and it is absolutely easier and more relaxing. My oldest was high stats and ambitious and applied to 20 schools, about 15 of which were reaches, after getting rejected ED. My second is a B+ and high 1300s kid is applying pretty exclusively to targets and safeties. To your point, my oldest had loads of excellent options, he had a very successful application process overall, but it was long, arduous, and stressful for him. |
I'm going through the process now with a similar child and, so far, it hasn't been stressful. She knew what kind of school she wanted, identified a first choice school that admits 70% of applicants, and is applying ED. Anything is possible and if she doesn't get in we'll have to reassess, but I like her odds -- certainly better than a straight A student who fell in love with a school with a 5% acceptance rate. |
ya, but all that hard work MAY never pay off, that is the issue. |
Hundreds of thousands of kids enter college each year with a history of "Hard work". I would hope the student wont stop because he will now attend "state U" rather than "selective U". |
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I’m going through this with my younger kid now. Both of my kids were A students but older one had average test scores for DCUM. 1300’s and younger in 1500’s.
Applying almost to exactly the same schools but I worry about my younger one being yield protected and if he applies to lottery schools even though his stats are in the range he’s likely to be rejected. I think it’s interesting that due to competition the high stats kids are more likely to see rejections |
Yeah. It's not fair to those kids. |
Have him apply to schools with matrix-based admissions like Iowa and Iowa State. Plug his SAT/ACT and core GPA into the formula on their website. If it's over the minimum, he's in. |
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I had a B student with a 30 ACT score and 2 APs and an A- student with a 34 and 5 or 6 APs. They didnt do test prep or many college visits. Both applied to targets and safeties, academically and in terms of admission rates. Between the two of them they had 13 acceptances and one waitlist (DS applied to a music major that was very competitive for his instrument).
I doubt they could even identify half of the Ivy League schools much less the rest of the top 20. They had no dream schools and still found good fits and had good experiences without a lot of stress during the process. |
| IN our area, the kids who are the most bitter are FCPS excellent students, in a sea of excellent students. Their parents have said "instate only." They can't get into UVA/WM. The number of APs has been ridiculous and they are bitter. Did not enjoy high school very much. |
I'd of been pissed too if I'd gone through the FCPS AP grind only to end up at JMU. Who are these parents, and why won't they consider OOS or private options that might be the same price as or lower than a VA school? |
My son has no desire to go to school in Iowa. Not many kids from DMV think this is a great option. |
He might be screwed then. |
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I loved going through the process with my B+ student. Everything was a happy surprise. “Hey, this lesser-known school is pretty great!”
“Hey, they want me!” “Hey, that’s a nice merit offer!” Just much more relaxed and fun. Also more thinking about what they want vs. who wanted them. It was really nice. The process for my shooting-for-prestige A student was different. Much more stressful, more rejections, including both ED1 and ED2, far more stress about what peers thought, and also whether or not they were “wanted.” I dunno. In retrospect I don’t really think the angst about higher prestige contributed more than it cost. Looking back it feels like a pretty big waste of energy. |