I want to start hosting more, but I’m not a great cook

Anonymous
Just do a wine and cheese party instead! When I was in my 20s in NYC and people didn’t really use their kitchens, the standard was to have a party with a great cheese and crackers spread from Fairway (RIP) or Zabars. If you advertise it to your friends as a “wine and cheese party” they’ll know what to expect.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Honestly I'm super laid back and care more about the company than the food so I'm good with pasta, tacos, pizza, burgers, etc. A warm, fun, and inviting host is way more important to me than the food. N


This! Other ideas: pulled pork, chili, soup paired with delicious breads from a bakery and fancy butter/olive oil.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I think the key is to provide enough food and to provide options, I would do more than one appetizer and more than one side dish. Something like the taco bar someone suggested is a good way to go.


What? No, this is the opposite of what I would suggest. OP should pick one main dish, one veggie side, and one starch. And practice the recipes twice beforehand. For the main, pick a braised or slow-cooked meat. VERY hard to mess that up. Braise short ribs, salad, crusty baguette, and you’re done.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Nobody cares about the quality of food if you are a warm and welcoming host.

And it doesn't cost that much more to have a casual restaurant cater. Worth it to reduce the stress.


Well not exactly. If it’s BAD or really delayed or OP is super stressed, then that’s not great.

The good news is that there are any number of almost fool-proof delicious main courses, that you can pair with bread and salad. Add in some wine and you’re done. But you’ll need to practice the recipes at least twice - being a “good” cook is about practice just like anything else.
Anonymous
Get over your ideas of tacky. You can even say "want to come over for some Chinese food and a Selling Sunset binge?" You can buy a roasted chicken from Whole Foods or Costco and warm it (don't dry it out!) before serving with potatoes and asparagus or something.

Keep your ideas about fraudulent - nobody wants to eat your leftovers. Regarding actually cooking, the key is to be able to make three or four things extremely well. You don't need to be able to cook a cookbook's worth of meals.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Honestly I'm super laid back and care more about the company than the food so I'm good with pasta, tacos, pizza, burgers, etc. A warm, fun, and inviting host is way more important to me than the food. N

Same. I'm actually a pretty picky eater so I'd probably prefer this over salmon or something.
Anonymous
What your friends describe is what I'd enjoy, and these home parties are never about the food. It's the warmth and company. As long as you have enough options for munchies and drinks, everything is gravy. In a pinch I'd get Costco platters.

I've been to some houses where the hosts like to showcase their amazing cooking skills. Almost every single time there's not enough food, the host is too distracted by cooking/presenting the food just so that there's not much interaction with them, and ppl gratefully wolfing down donuts/fried chicken brought by other guests.

Keep true to your welcoming/chill vibe--that's the most essential of hosting.
Anonymous
I am like you.

salmon, salad and bought dessert

Meal prep kit like stir fry from market

High end lasagna or eggplant parm that you heat up. Make a salad and dessert

Spaghetti and frozen meatballs you cook
Anonymous
I will add one more thing - if you aren't a great cook, and you know it - and others in your circle are - don't host for the big events. Christmas/Hanukkah, New Years Eve etc. - let someone who is more comfortable pulling off a special occasion meal take those ones, and you stick to a more regular Saturday night, or Sunday brunch, etc.

Anonymous
Easy stuff --

Baked pastas - https://www.skinnytaste.com/baked-manicotti-cannelloni/, lasagna, ziti

Roast a chicken - there is a spatchcocked one at trader joes that is fool proof. oven roast potatoes, make a salad

Grill burgers and hot dogs and do a pasta salad and regular salad

Chili

Let people bring sides!
Anonymous
Consider brunch, instead. Offer mimosas, make a quiche, bake some muffins, have coffee ready, et voila!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I will add one more thing - if you aren't a great cook, and you know it - and others in your circle are - don't host for the big events. Christmas/Hanukkah, New Years Eve etc. - let someone who is more comfortable pulling off a special occasion meal take those ones, and you stick to a more regular Saturday night, or Sunday brunch, etc.


Yes, or you host the cookie exchange at your house. My friend does a latkes and vodka party each Hanukah. She serves those two things plus apple sauce, sour cream, and jelly donuts. It's awesome!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Just do a wine and cheese party instead! When I was in my 20s in NYC and people didn’t really use their kitchens, the standard was to have a party with a great cheese and crackers spread from Fairway (RIP) or Zabars. If you advertise it to your friends as a “wine and cheese party” they’ll know what to expect.


I live in NYC and Fairway is still around! I popped into the UES one a few days ago.

OP, you don’t have to be a good cook to host! I do a lot of “semi-homemade” cooking that involves mostly assembly or basic prep using a lot of assistance from store-bought ingredients. I love to cook, but I make meals like these on weekdays all the time and would feel zero guilt serving them to friends.

Like:

- Spaghetti and meatballs: Boil spaghetti or linguine. In a separate pot, reheat decent-quality meatballs (you could do frozen or premade from a nicer supermarket) in a decent-quality store bought sauce (Carbone and Rao’s have good ones). If you want to make an easy homemade sauce, Marcella Hazan’s tomato and butter sauce is amazing with extremely minimal effort. Then get a couple of Caesar salad kits and maybe make some garlic bread on the side (which is mostly assembly too - you can use jarred minced garlic if you have it). Serve really good Parmesan that you grated yourself alongside the spaghetti.

- One-pot rice: Prepare a boxed jambalaya or red beans and rice mix. Add any combination of sliced smoked sausage (precooked, I get mine from Whole Foods), chicken, or shrimp. Roasted veggies on the side.

- Fajitas: Slice sirloin/flank/skirt/ribeye steak, green peppers, and white/yellow onions into roughly equal sized slices. Drizzle in some oil and a packet or two of taco seasoning (Trader Joe’s has a good one) and let marinate for an hour. Throw it all onto a hot cast iron pan to cook. Serve with tortillas, salsa, and shredded cheese on the side.

- Stir-fry: Buy stir-fry sauce. Whole Foods has some nice high-end ones in the Asian aisle. Buy and cut up veggies of your choice, or buy a bagged stir-fry veggie mix if you prefer. Slice steak or chicken thighs, season and velvet the meat if you can. Heat up a cast iron if you don’t have a wok, add oil, then the veggies and meat, then some garlic and ginger (you can mince it yourself or buy frozen pre-minced cubes at Whole Foods), then the sauce. I like to pair this with noodles. The Momofuku brand, available at Whole Foods, is good. I cook them without the included sauce and mix them in at the end.

With any of these, you can serve box mix brownies (Ghirardelli), fruit, and/or ice cream for dessert. Or pick something up. Or ask a guest to. None of these are the fanciest meal, but IMO they’re plenty respectable.
Anonymous
My DD, who is a not so great cook (sorry), hosts wonderful parties, usually around a theme, eg Middle eastern appetizers, make your own pizza, summer salads, Mac and cheese with toppings
Anonymous
I would only serve food that can be prepared ahead of time, eg a goulash or beef stew, cow au vin, chili, or a spaghetti bolognese sauce.
That way you can focus on your guests and not be stressed during last minute preparations
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