Retirees and gambling

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP again. She plays only blackjack and I think gives herself a limit each time. I don’t know exactly what that limit is, but probably no more than a few hundred.

It is possible to be disciplined about gambling. The only thing that would concern me is your mother insisting that every vacation include it since that is addictive behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. A little background on my MIL. She is pretty financially secure, at least according to her. FIL was successful and left her money. Don't know how much-maybe $1.5 to 2 million, we think.

House is paid off. There's a fully funded life insurance policy, with grandkids as beneficiaries. She's got long-term health insurance We're not particularly worried that she's gambling away her life savings, as she has assets and doesn't bet huge. However.....

She goes with a friend to a nearby state to a casino at least once a week now that she's widowed. She was a frequent gambler for years and years, but it may have picked up a bit since we lost my FIL. Any vacation she takes must involve casinos, which pretty much limits her to certain Caribbean islands and cruise ships. If you ask her to join you on vacation, that will be her first question and she won't go unless there's gambling.

Because she's financially secure and is not throwing away ungodly sums, I don't know if there's cause to worry. We've talked about it with DH's sister and she thinks it's just an all-consuming hobby. Thoughts?

She has no way of knowing if she'll live to 75 or 105 - she needs to hold onto this money. She has an addiction and needs to be stopped.

[Anonymous]

Maybe you could play some blackjack with her and see how much she drops in a session.

[Anonymous]

She likes the socializing, the "going out somewhere" aspects too I would guess. I would too if I were widowed. But I am not a gambler.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. A little background on my MIL. She is pretty financially secure, at least according to her. FIL was successful and left her money. Don't know how much-maybe $1.5 to 2 million, we think.

House is paid off. There's a fully funded life insurance policy, with grandkids as beneficiaries. She's got long-term health insurance We're not particularly worried that she's gambling away her life savings, as she has assets and doesn't bet huge. However.....

She goes with a friend to a nearby state to a casino at least once a week now that she's widowed. She was a frequent gambler for years and years, but it may have picked up a bit since we lost my FIL. Any vacation she takes must involve casinos, which pretty much limits her to certain Caribbean islands and cruise ships. If you ask her to join you on vacation, that will be her first question and she won't go unless there's gambling.

Because she's financially secure and is not throwing away ungodly sums, I don't know if there's cause to worry. We've talked about it with DH's sister and she thinks it's just an all-consuming hobby. Thoughts?

I’d say mind your own business, she is old and rich and alone and this is her hobby. Who cares.

[Anonymous]

Let me get this straight you’re worried that your multi millionaire widowed MIL spends 2-3 hundred bucks once a week or so on blackjack.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. A little background on my MIL. She is pretty financially secure, at least according to her. FIL was successful and left her money. Don't know how much-maybe $1.5 to 2 million, we think.

House is paid off. There's a fully funded life insurance policy, with grandkids as beneficiaries. She's got long-term health insurance We're not particularly worried that she's gambling away her life savings, as she has assets and doesn't bet huge. However.....

She goes with a friend to a nearby state to a casino at least once a week now that she's widowed. She was a frequent gambler for years and years, but it may have picked up a bit since we lost my FIL. Any vacation she takes must involve casinos, which pretty much limits her to certain Caribbean islands and cruise ships. If you ask her to join you on vacation, that will be her first question and she won't go unless there's gambling.

Because she's financially secure and is not throwing away ungodly sums, I don't know if there's cause to worry. We've talked about it with DH's sister and she thinks it's just an all-consuming hobby. Thoughts?

She has no way of knowing if she'll live to 75 or 105 - she needs to hold onto this money. She has an addiction and needs to be stopped.

Isn’t it her money and her life? She doesn’t have dependents. Or bills . Literally why does it matter.

[Anonymous]

I was shocked when my (socially) conservative, extremely responsible grandmother started to gamble. She had finally divorced my abusive, controlling grandfather after 35 years. She went to work to build up her financial security and I could not understand why she would gamble. So I asked.

After all those years of accounting for every cent to her parsimonious husband, she loved doing something utterly frivolous with some of her money. It was a way of reveling in her autonomy. She was very strict about how much she would gamble and never had any problems. It was a source of entertainment and although I don’t care for it myself, I understand why she did.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. A little background on my MIL. She is pretty financially secure, at least according to her. FIL was successful and left her money. Don't know how much-maybe $1.5 to 2 million, we think.

House is paid off. There's a fully funded life insurance policy, with grandkids as beneficiaries. She's got long-term health insurance We're not particularly worried that she's gambling away her life savings, as she has assets and doesn't bet huge. However.....

She goes with a friend to a nearby state to a casino at least once a week now that she's widowed. She was a frequent gambler for years and years, but it may have picked up a bit since we lost my FIL. Any vacation she takes must involve casinos, which pretty much limits her to certain Caribbean islands and cruise ships. If you ask her to join you on vacation, that will be her first question and she won't go unless there's gambling.

Because she's financially secure and is not throwing away ungodly sums, I don't know if there's cause to worry. We've talked about it with DH's sister and she thinks it's just an all-consuming hobby. Thoughts?

She has no way of knowing if she'll live to 75 or 105 - she needs to hold onto this money. She has an addiction and needs to be stopped.

Isn’t it her money and her life? She doesn’t have dependents. Or bills . Literally why does it matter.

She doesn't have bills? She has to pay for food, tax on her home even if no mortgage, utilities, cable, car, car insurance, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Butt out
It’s not your money
I’m not a fan of casinos but she’s done this forever leave her be .

She’s an adult

Wrong. She could gamble through her retirement savings. Seen it happen. My former housekeeper used to own a successful business, drive a Mercedes and live in a nice neighborhood before her husband gambled away everything. She cleans houses and lives in crappy apartment in a crime-ridden area of town. Addicts lie to everyone.

And what can you do about it? She is an adult!
I would encourage her to stick to a budget. Like we have travel budgets. If it brings her joy who are you to forbid her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. A little background on my MIL. She is pretty financially secure, at least according to her. FIL was successful and left her money. Don't know how much-maybe $1.5 to 2 million, we think.

House is paid off. There's a fully funded life insurance policy, with grandkids as beneficiaries. She's got long-term health insurance We're not particularly worried that she's gambling away her life savings, as she has assets and doesn't bet huge. However.....

She goes with a friend to a nearby state to a casino at least once a week now that she's widowed. She was a frequent gambler for years and years, but it may have picked up a bit since we lost my FIL. Any vacation she takes must involve casinos, which pretty much limits her to certain Caribbean islands and cruise ships. If you ask her to join you on vacation, that will be her first question and she won't go unless there's gambling.

Because she's financially secure and is not throwing away ungodly sums, I don't know if there's cause to worry. We've talked about it with DH's sister and she thinks it's just an all-consuming hobby. Thoughts?

I'd worry about the bad genes she passed to your kids.

[Anonymous]

Gamblers and shopping addicts lie about how wealthy they are.

[Anonymous]

They are elderly. Let them live their life.