If your spouse was fired from a job...

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't be very supportive if it was due to something illegal or unethical, or the person wasn't doing their work or meeting deadlines without a good reason.

But my smart, hard-working, very likeable spouse has been pushed out of two different jobs (over 20 years) by a lazy, less-smart boss that felt threatened by him. He always finds something else immediately, usually for more money, and it's clear the prior job was just a bad fit.

So it really just depends the reason or the circumstances.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't be very supportive if it was due to something illegal or unethical, or the person wasn't doing their work or meeting deadlines without a good reason.

But my smart, hard-working, very likeable spouse has been pushed out of two different jobs (over 20 years) by a lazy, less-smart boss that felt threatened by him. He always finds something else immediately, usually for more money, and it's clear the prior job was just a bad fit.

So it really just depends the reason or the circumstances.

I was pushed out of a non-union federal job for reasons beyond my control. They were threatening to develop a disciplinary case, or I could choose to leave on my own terms. They gave me a few months of gardening leave plus let me use a couple months of accrued annual leave. I could try to fight them, but it would’ve ended up at MSPB and a public record easily available on Google. Most people lose at MSPB and I would have needed to hire an attorney. Not worth the fight or bad publicity.

I ended up moving to another agency before my leave ran out and within 6 months of leaving my former job I had increased my comp by 40%. Best thing that ever happened to me. It really turbo charged my career.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:hot take but I am of the opinion that everyone should always be half looking for a new opp at all times so that if you are let go then you have a 'cushion'. So I would only be unsupportive if spouse has zero new leads - which has happened and i was annoyed.
always.be.looking

+1
Esp if you work for a smaller company in a human capital intensive field, the management can change their minds overnight and you can be out of a job right away.

Paying attention to new oppos is not only a cushion but a good view into what’s in demand skill set so you can apply mindfulness to your current job to actively pursue those skills.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I was pushed out of a non-union federal job for reasons beyond my control. They were threatening to develop a disciplinary case, or I could choose to leave on my own terms. They gave me a few months of gardening leave plus let me use a couple months of accrued annual leave. I could try to fight them, but it would’ve ended up at MSPB and a public record easily available on Google. Most people lose at MSPB and I would have needed to hire an attorney. Not worth the fight or bad publicity.

I ended up moving to another agency before my leave ran out and within 6 months of leaving my former job I had increased my comp by 40%. Best thing that ever happened to me. It really turbo charged my career.

I was stabbed in the back by my previous employer in an at-will position. Had zero negative feedback about my job performance my entire time. Basically zero feedback at all.

Then my boss tells me at my review how horrible I've done in my position and that I have 30 days to shape up or ship out. As everyone knows, 30 days is just a prerequisite for firing. You don't have a prayer. There was absolutely nothing about my job performance that couldn't have been corrected with some feedback and some time.

Instead, my drain-circling previous employer pushed me out the door to make my boss, who can't see his penis when he pees, feel better.

[Anonymous]

Yes, because I was scared and worried and had moments of wondering about what he was truly like at work. But I tried not to show it. Try to be the spouse you would want if the situation was reversed. The situation is a blip; the relationship is hopefully forever.

It worked out for us. It took a long time and was financially very hard, but we recovered.

[Anonymous]

Same situation as the ASD/ADHD poster. DH has been fired from every job he ever had- sometimes after 5 years and sometimes after 3 months. I make most of the money so I try not to worry about it. I used to be more supportive. But Im not mean about it- I just ignore