Work stress and quitting

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are considering quitting over this it is worth having a very direct conversation with your manager about your level of unhappiness and exactly what you want. Maybe say you are unwilling to sustain it more than X months, since you’ve already been doing it for X months. You are a team player and you have taken one for the team but the scope of work, hours, etc. have changed drastically and without a conversation around if you wanted that professionally. If you need income don’t quit without another job. Also, can you take any vacation to reset a little in the meantime?

I have told her it was too much already. As of today I am still on this team. I asked again this am and she said we will discuss later, but during our larger meeting it sounded like I am an ongoing member. As for a vacation that is part of the issue: I have next week off and will not be able to be truly off if I have this specific job, which is devastating to me as I am visiting my parents and I want to focus 100% on them as it is the one time I see them yearly. I feel like they are treating me incredibly poorly. I do not need the income in the sense I am not well paid and dh makes a lot more.

Put in your two weeks notice and look for something else. This sentence tells me you have the luxury to do so.

+1 life is too short. We know a few people who have died of cancer from age 50 to 70. I've noticed my blood pressure spikes during working hours.

I'm going to quit in a couple of years once my youngest goes off to college. I want to enjoy my life not constantly be stressed out by work. it's awful for your health.

[Anonymous]

OP, if your vacation is approved, put an out of office message on your accounts. You don't have to work on vacation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just ignore messages. Spend the first several hours of the day job searching. Long lunch. Respond to messages after lunch. If you have to do your own work do it after hours if you are so inclined to make overtime. Or it just doesn't get done. You already told the boss you were overwhelmed.

You will either find a new job or be let go. Both better than quitting with nothing.

I would be let go pretty much immediately if I didn't do the work: it's tracked daily and the messages are all instant, I get called directly and I am supposed to be "on", so quiet quitting isn't really a possibility. I know this because they have let go people for not answering a message within two days.

Sure, but that when you’re not OOO. Next eeek you’re OOO and there should be folks covering for you. They can answer the messages at all hours.

[Anonymous]

There’s a difference between telling your manager you’re unhappy and telling them you’re planning to quit if things don’t change by x date. Of course you have to mean that and follow through. But if it’s worth it to you, you can try it. Worst case you leave, best case they stick you back in the old job, middle ground is you get some responsibilities removed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There’s a difference between telling your manager you’re unhappy and telling them you’re planning to quit if things don’t change by x date. Of course you have to mean that and follow through. But if it’s worth it to you, you can try it. Worst case you leave, best case they stick you back in the old job, middle ground is you get some responsibilities removed.

To add another layer, my manager is a horrendous condescending person I hated since day 1. I didn't have to deal with her much then, and now deal with her daily, several times a day. She is very demanding with what she wants, but conveniently opaque when she doesn't want to discuss something. I have asked her for status info point blank already. She's ignoring it and telling me "later" because she has no solution: They are growing too big without staffing before growth, and throwing everything at low pay employees, including what are really high level issues and responsibilities. Somehow everyone seems to just suck it up which makes no sense to me. I worked almost 12 hours yesterday. So it feels impossible, and like pushing more will be a confrontation. Truthfully my self-esteem is not great at this point, and I am not sure I want to engage further with this person who really has a bit of a supervillain vibe about her. I have been thinking maybe I'd go on vacation, be okay but mediocre on my return and give two weeks notice and pretend it's some personal issues because I don't think honesty would pay at all.