Tell me about the transition to kindergarten for a child with ASD1 and anxiety in gen ed and how to make it successful

[Anonymous]

Even if you are not able to have an IEP in place before kindergarten, you may find it useful to have an advance chat with the principal over the summer. We had an IEP going into K, but it did not even begin to describe our child's actual needs (we have since sorted that out.) The principal heard us out and gave a lot of thought to assigning a kindergarten teacher. We didn't ask for someone specific, we just described our child and the skills we thought would be especially important for the teacher to have in their toolbox. This was very helpful. The teacher was a great fit! We were also able to have our child visit the building a few times over the summer when it wasn't full of other kids. The principal appreciated the outreach and wanted to help. Obviously not every school has that mindset but never hurts to ask.

[Anonymous]

"I think what some folks are missing is that ASD1 is a very broad category. ASD1 is diagnosed as late as adolescence or later for some kids because they are able to get by until that age.

Many families with this diagnosis at age 5 seek IEPs and don't get them. It's not that we're not trying - there's some history here I'm intentionally not sharing - it's just that realistically, we don't expect to have it in place when she starts K."

Again, this is false. Do you have statistics about the number of families who asked for IEP and got denied because their ASD1 child was too high functioning? Unless you work in a SpEd central office somewhere, you simply don't know this and can't back it up with any data or studies.

Whoever told you this information did you a disservice. Maybe there are uninformed, or maybe they had an agenda.

A lot of kids these days get diagnosed early - like at 2 or 3 years old. They tend to receive services through the public early intervention program (infants and toddlers if under 3, then at 3 via another program, in MCPS it's PEP). Children in PEP get an IEP at 3 years old and it continues onwards, updated every year. Social deficits and communication for social purposes are absolutely reasons to have an IEP in early elementary. BTW this is why another poster asked if you received any early childhood services - because if you did, getting an IEP is a bit of a different path.

Also, what is "doing well in school" exactly? If it's not related to being on grade level, then what is it?

In general, public schools will steer you away from IEP and services if they can. They will also tell you "all is well" unless there are major behavioral problems resulting in injury (to self or others) or property damage. Is that your definition of "well"? Probably not.

You're being told by people in the trenches what is what, but somehow you find a way to get offended and continue saying that up is down and black is white. OK, good luck.

[Anonymous]

Again, this is false. Do you have statistics about the number of families who asked for IEP and got denied because their ASD1 child was too high functioning? Unless you work in a SpEd central office somewhere, you simply don't know this and can't back it up with any data or studies.

Whoever told you this information did you a disservice. Maybe there are uninformed, or maybe they had an agenda.

A lot of kids these days get diagnosed early - like at 2 or 3 years old. They tend to receive services through the public early intervention program (infants and toddlers if under 3, then at 3 via another program, in MCPS it's PEP). Children in PEP get an IEP at 3 years old and it continues onwards, updated every year. Social deficits and communication for social purposes are absolutely reasons to have an IEP in early elementary. BTW this is why another poster asked if you received any early childhood services - because if you did, getting an IEP is a bit of a different path.

Also, what is "doing well in school" exactly? If it's not related to being on grade level, then what is it?

In general, public schools will steer you away from IEP and services if they can. They will also tell you "all is well" unless there are major behavioral problems resulting in injury (to self or others) or property damage. Is that your definition of "well"? Probably not.

You're being told by people in the trenches what is what, but somehow you find a way to get offended and continue saying that up is down and black is white. OK, good luck.

You're not making sense. You're saying both that:

- I'm completely wrong that many kids with ASD don't get IEPs; and
- Public schools will steer us away from IEPs.

If the second is true, then it's undoubtedly true that many kids with ASD don't get IEPs. I actually know several families with kids with IEPs as well as families with kids with ASD that did not have an IEP at my child's age (who are adults now and doing great, by the way). A medical diagnosis of autism does not automatically mean a child is eligible for special education. I absolutely agree that deficits in social communication can qualify for an IEP, but it is not automatic. My child presents differently than many children with ASD who are diagnosed at an early age. Since you haven't met DC, I understand why you might be perplexed (the educators that have spent a lot of time with DC are conversely perplexed by the diagnosis). But it also means that with regards to the amount of time, energy and resources we expend on getting the IEP vs ensuring DC has private supports, we're going to rely on the professionals that are licensed and have actually met DC. It's not that I'm "offended" - it's that my child is not your child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Even if you are not able to have an IEP in place before kindergarten, you may find it useful to have an advance chat with the principal over the summer. We had an IEP going into K, but it did not even begin to describe our child's actual needs (we have since sorted that out.) The principal heard us out and gave a lot of thought to assigning a kindergarten teacher. We didn't ask for someone specific, we just described our child and the skills we thought would be especially important for the teacher to have in their toolbox. This was very helpful. The teacher was a great fit! We were also able to have our child visit the building a few times over the summer when it wasn't full of other kids. The principal appreciated the outreach and wanted to help. Obviously not every school has that mindset but never hurts to ask.

Thank you! I really appreciate these ideas and it is in line with what other people have suggested to us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Again, this is false. Do you have statistics about the number of families who asked for IEP and got denied because their ASD1 child was too high functioning? Unless you work in a SpEd central office somewhere, you simply don't know this and can't back it up with any data or studies.

Whoever told you this information did you a disservice. Maybe there are uninformed, or maybe they had an agenda.

A lot of kids these days get diagnosed early - like at 2 or 3 years old. They tend to receive services through the public early intervention program (infants and toddlers if under 3, then at 3 via another program, in MCPS it's PEP). Children in PEP get an IEP at 3 years old and it continues onwards, updated every year. Social deficits and communication for social purposes are absolutely reasons to have an IEP in early elementary. BTW this is why another poster asked if you received any early childhood services - because if you did, getting an IEP is a bit of a different path.

Also, what is "doing well in school" exactly? If it's not related to being on grade level, then what is it?

In general, public schools will steer you away from IEP and services if they can. They will also tell you "all is well" unless there are major behavioral problems resulting in injury (to self or others) or property damage. Is that your definition of "well"? Probably not.

You're being told by people in the trenches what is what, but somehow you find a way to get offended and continue saying that up is down and black is white. OK, good luck.

You're not making sense. You're saying both that:

- I'm completely wrong that many kids with ASD don't get IEPs; and
- Public schools will steer us away from IEPs.

If the second is true, then it's undoubtedly true that many kids with ASD don't get IEPs. I actually know several families with kids with IEPs as well as families with kids with ASD that did not have an IEP at my child's age (who are adults now and doing great, by the way). A medical diagnosis of autism does not automatically mean a child is eligible for special education. I absolutely agree that deficits in social communication can qualify for an IEP, but it is not automatic. My child presents differently than many children with ASD who are diagnosed at an early age. Since you haven't met DC, I understand why you might be perplexed (the educators that have spent a lot of time with DC are conversely perplexed by the diagnosis). But it also means that with regards to the amount of time, energy and resources we expend on getting the IEP vs ensuring DC has private supports, we're going to rely on the professionals that are licensed and have actually met DC. It's not that I'm "offended" - it's that my child is not your child.

Look, you're creating drama where there needs to be none. You asked how to ensure ASD1 child succeeds in K - the answer is IEP. But you seem in the bargaining stage of acceptance - yes, there is ASD, but it's so atypical it's like no other ASD presentation. OK, cool.

I am not contradicting myself:
- diagnostics and awareness improved, so many children are diagnosed early. Those individuals who are adults now had a different environment in terms of diagnosis, awareness and acceptance, it's almost irrelevant.
- many children come to K ALREADY with IEPs, so schools can't deny them
- those coming in in K who don't have an IEP, for them the school can drag feet with the initial IEP and tell you high tales about why you may not need to pursue it
- at this stage some people get an advocate/lawyer. that's smart. also pricey
- some parents choose to believe these high tales that everything will be ok. Are you willing to risk it in order to maintain a vain belief that your child is so unique and high functioning that they don't need it? It's entirely up to you. Internet doesn't care either way.
- I suspect there was some drama with infants and toddlers, resulting in your child not getting services and that's why you bristled so much at a simple yes/no question
- I also suspect you will be back here scrambling about how to get supports into place ASAP at some point in K or 1st.
- For your child's sake, get help for your own anxiety.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Look, you're creating drama where there needs to be none. You asked how to ensure ASD1 child succeeds in K - the answer is IEP. But you seem in the bargaining stage of acceptance - yes, there is ASD, but it's so atypical it's like no other ASD presentation. OK, cool.

I am not contradicting myself:
- diagnostics and awareness improved, so many children are diagnosed early. Those individuals who are adults now had a different environment in terms of diagnosis, awareness and acceptance, it's almost irrelevant.
- many children come to K ALREADY with IEPs, so schools can't deny them
- those coming in in K who don't have an IEP, for them the school can drag feet with the initial IEP and tell you high tales about why you may not need to pursue it
- at this stage some people get an advocate/lawyer. that's smart. also pricey
- some parents choose to believe these high tales that everything will be ok. Are you willing to risk it in order to maintain a vain belief that your child is so unique and high functioning that they don't need it? It's entirely up to you. Internet doesn't care either way.
- I suspect there was some drama with infants and toddlers, resulting in your child not getting services and that's why you bristled so much at a simple yes/no question
- I also suspect you will be back here scrambling about how to get supports into place ASAP at some point in K or 1st.
- For your child's sake, get help for your own anxiety.

Actually I specifically asked about the transition to kindergarten.

You haven't met my child. I don't use the term "high functioning" and don't think it's helpful.

You have called me "vain" and indicated I "believe high tales that everything will be ok", which is completely out of line. I don't think everything will be okay, I can't fathom how you got that from my posts. I will cop to being offended at that because you have no idea what I have been through to ensure my child is supported and which has gotten us to this point where DC is doing well in school. You've insisted there was "drama with infants and toddlers" and said I "bristled at a simple yes/no question" which tells me your experiences are really different from ours, probably because our children our different. It's not remotely a yes/no question, it's an entire history that I am under no obligation to share here.

Please find a way to be kinder to people who have different experiences and needs than your family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Look, you're creating drama where there needs to be none. You asked how to ensure ASD1 child succeeds in K - the answer is IEP. But you seem in the bargaining stage of acceptance - yes, there is ASD, but it's so atypical it's like no other ASD presentation. OK, cool.

I am not contradicting myself:
- diagnostics and awareness improved, so many children are diagnosed early. Those individuals who are adults now had a different environment in terms of diagnosis, awareness and acceptance, it's almost irrelevant.
- many children come to K ALREADY with IEPs, so schools can't deny them
- those coming in in K who don't have an IEP, for them the school can drag feet with the initial IEP and tell you high tales about why you may not need to pursue it
- at this stage some people get an advocate/lawyer. that's smart. also pricey
- some parents choose to believe these high tales that everything will be ok. Are you willing to risk it in order to maintain a vain belief that your child is so unique and high functioning that they don't need it? It's entirely up to you. Internet doesn't care either way.
- I suspect there was some drama with infants and toddlers, resulting in your child not getting services and that's why you bristled so much at a simple yes/no question
- I also suspect you will be back here scrambling about how to get supports into place ASAP at some point in K or 1st.
- For your child's sake, get help for your own anxiety.

Actually I specifically asked about the transition to kindergarten.

You haven't met my child. I don't use the term "high functioning" and don't think it's helpful.

You have called me "vain" and indicated I "believe high tales that everything will be ok", which is completely out of line. I don't think everything will be okay, I can't fathom how you got that from my posts. I will cop to being offended at that because you have no idea what I have been through to ensure my child is supported and which has gotten us to this point where DC is doing well in school. You've insisted there was "drama with infants and toddlers" and said I "bristled at a simple yes/no question" which tells me your experiences are really different from ours, probably because our children our different. It's not remotely a yes/no question, it's an entire history that I am under no obligation to share here.

Please find a way to be kinder to people who have different experiences and needs than your family.

OP, I get what you’re saying and I suspect my child is similar. Does well academically but is behind socially. We did Infants and Toddlers but she was refused admission to the PEP program at age 3 because their evaluation said she didn’t qualify for it. We have a private half-day shadow for her in daycare right now but are wondering what to do for K this fall.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Look, you're creating drama where there needs to be none. You asked how to ensure ASD1 child succeeds in K - the answer is IEP. But you seem in the bargaining stage of acceptance - yes, there is ASD, but it's so atypical it's like no other ASD presentation. OK, cool.

I am not contradicting myself:
- diagnostics and awareness improved, so many children are diagnosed early. Those individuals who are adults now had a different environment in terms of diagnosis, awareness and acceptance, it's almost irrelevant.
- many children come to K ALREADY with IEPs, so schools can't deny them
- those coming in in K who don't have an IEP, for them the school can drag feet with the initial IEP and tell you high tales about why you may not need to pursue it
- at this stage some people get an advocate/lawyer. that's smart. also pricey
- some parents choose to believe these high tales that everything will be ok. Are you willing to risk it in order to maintain a vain belief that your child is so unique and high functioning that they don't need it? It's entirely up to you. Internet doesn't care either way.
- I suspect there was some drama with infants and toddlers, resulting in your child not getting services and that's why you bristled so much at a simple yes/no question
- I also suspect you will be back here scrambling about how to get supports into place ASAP at some point in K or 1st.
- For your child's sake, get help for your own anxiety.

Actually I specifically asked about the transition to kindergarten.

You haven't met my child. I don't use the term "high functioning" and don't think it's helpful.

You have called me "vain" and indicated I "believe high tales that everything will be ok", which is completely out of line. I don't think everything will be okay, I can't fathom how you got that from my posts. I will cop to being offended at that because you have no idea what I have been through to ensure my child is supported and which has gotten us to this point where DC is doing well in school. You've insisted there was "drama with infants and toddlers" and said I "bristled at a simple yes/no question" which tells me your experiences are really different from ours, probably because our children our different. It's not remotely a yes/no question, it's an entire history that I am under no obligation to share here.

Please find a way to be kinder to people who have different experiences and needs than your family.

OP, I get what you’re saying and I suspect my child is similar. Does well academically but is behind socially. We did Infants and Toddlers but she was refused admission to the PEP program at age 3 because their evaluation said she didn’t qualify for it. We have a private half-day shadow for her in daycare right now but are wondering what to do for K this fall.

Thanks. The special ed system is so frustrating. We've done a lot privately and it's made a big difference. We're lucky to have had good insurance with OON benefits to cover it and that outside supports have been effective for DC, but it's infuriating that these services are so hard for families to get. I hope you are able to get your DC the support she needs from MCPS soon.