Is any of this normal coach behavior?

[Anonymous]

He might’ve woke up on the wrong side of the truck bed this morning

[Anonymous]

Eh. Not out of the realm of normal. Does not make it ok. My boys quit their teams with coaches like this.

[Anonymous]

The problem with filing anonymously is the AD can just ignore it. You will never even know if the for your letter or if the coach was ever spoken to about the behavior. I understand raising the issue anonymously is to protect your child, but it will not result in any action.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He might’ve woke up on the wrong side of the truck bed this morning

This made me smile.

The coach's behavior is absolutely unacceptable and I wouldn't put up with it. I would report him and find some other place or sport for my kid to play.

In my sport, there was a widespread culture of abuse, and a lot of pushback when it was finally addressed, so people will be telling you that this is normal. It shouldn't be.

[Anonymous]

Glad to hear others think it's not normal either.

As for quitting, one kid has already quit this year. And my kid and friends are wondering what happened there. Apparently the coach also threatens people that they are going to get kicked off the team, etc.

For example, on the running in the park day, he told my kid and a friend that after that practice was over they need to turn in their jerseys and quit. He also seems to have beef with kids who play club off-season and are always saying that if they'd rather be playing club they need to quit now, etc. It's all so ridiculous. But, yeah, of course, my kid would rather be at club than with this guy because club coaches are all normal people, give constructive feedback rather than constant criticism and punishment with no follow-up advice.

My kid is just glad he has only has one week left with this guy and will stick it out. And his friend (the one who was recipient of the dog comment) told us today he will do the same. The varsity coach, whom they will play under this summer and next year, is just a great guy - pretty laid back, def will do the tough love thing if he thinks team isn't putting in all effort, etc., but he has never talked to the team or individual players like this.

I just feel bad about the kids who will be stuck with this guy next year and years after - and I'm sorry to hear some of you have kids who are experiencing the same or worse and admin didn't back you up. It really should not be this way.

[Anonymous]

The world isn’t perfect. Coaches yell at teenagers who do dumb stuff. Quit being a dork.

[Anonymous]

This is just my experience with one FCPS HS but the coaching behavior is uniformly terrible and our athletic director is a jerk.

I would probably send a note to the principal that you have concerns about the team and some of the things you have heard from your kids. Our principal has been more present at games this spring and I think it is because various complaints have come in about the athletic department in general

[Anonymous]

Some of your examples were silly (who cares if he talked to a teen like he was animal? Kid was too sensitive there - that kid needs to get a grip). Some of your examples were more serious (possible heat stroke at practice, homophobia).

The main problem is that you weren’t there and you aren’t sure exactly what was done or said. And little details are always exaggerated as stories get told.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some of your examples were silly (who cares if he talked to a teen like he was animal? Kid was too sensitive there - that kid needs to get a grip). Some of your examples were more serious (possible heat stroke at practice, homophobia).

The main problem is that you weren’t there and you aren’t sure exactly what was done or said. And little details are always exaggerated as stories get told.

The next time you're at work and leave your office/desk to get a cup of coffee and your boss yells at you in front of your colleagues to sit and stay just like a dog, let me know how that works out for you.

An adult does not get a free pass to talk to someone in this manner just because they are 15, 16 years old, maybe especially so since the power dynamic between coach and athlete is heavily, heavily skewed toward the coach.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some of your examples were silly (who cares if he talked to a teen like he was animal? Kid was too sensitive there - that kid needs to get a grip). Some of your examples were more serious (possible heat stroke at practice, homophobia).

The main problem is that you weren’t there and you aren’t sure exactly what was done or said. And little details are always exaggerated as stories get told.

The next time you're at work and leave your office/desk to get a cup of coffee and your boss yells at you in front of your colleagues to sit and stay just like a dog, let me know how that works out for you.

An adult does not get a free pass to talk to someone in this manner just because they are 15, 16 years old, maybe especially so since the power dynamic between coach and athlete is heavily, heavily skewed toward the coach.

I think you are being overly sensitive for some reason on this. You may want to figure out why this bothers you so much. You are probably projecting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some of your examples were silly (who cares if he talked to a teen like he was animal? Kid was too sensitive there - that kid needs to get a grip). Some of your examples were more serious (possible heat stroke at practice, homophobia).

The main problem is that you weren’t there and you aren’t sure exactly what was done or said. And little details are always exaggerated as stories get told.

I agree that - in isolation - some of the examples were dumb comments but not in-and-of-themselves dealbreakers. The thing is, even if you pile up a handful of those dumb comments - without the more serious ones - why do teen kids need to be around a mouthy jerk like that? These aren't dumb comments in the context of a generally tough love coach that is making the kids better, or if they are OP didn't report that. They're unnecessary attacks from a coach who doesn't sound that great. And then you pile on the bigger issue comments/actions and it becomes a case of "I know HS coaches are hard to find, but this crosses a line." As plenty of PPs have said, lots of high school coaches aren't like this at all.