I am dramatic and passionate. I don't care if someone said that about me. Do I get the work done, do a good job, and people enjoy working for me? Also yes. |
I don’t know why the PP is hung up on him calling me dramatic when my boss and his boss sided with me. Maybe I should have said he called me something else, because that’s not the point. My question is how to behave with someone at work after they slighted you (and to your report no less). Do you go back to exactly the way you were before and the way you treat everyone else or should you be more formal? I know this sounds ridiculous to a lot of you but I am an immigrant from a very rural background. I’m trying my best to navigate American workplace dynamics. |
. Sounds like you would have challenged him to a duel in another time period. "You have offended my honor, sir." This was your mistake. You should have tried to deal with the criticism in a constructive way |
People will talk behind your back. Your direct report should not have passed along his comment to you. It's not that big of a deal. I would forget it now and be yourself. |
It sounds like concise and to the point is what he wanted from you in the first place. |
Thanks for your response. I agree that I should be myself and move on from this. I’m |
He did you a favor because now you will communicate in a more appropriate business manner. Consider it constructive feedback and stop being so defensive. |
Are you female? And youngish?
There is a type of man who describes any woman as dramatic. If this is the case, don't change yourself for him and others like him. |
If multiple sources have confirmed you are not the problem, then you do not have to change your work style. The difficult colleague’s preferences should not be more important than your own freedom to communicate as you wish.
With that said, if there is a simple fix you can do to accommodate this person and it will make life easier for you, go for it. I have some colleagues I am more social with and others I am more direct with, since over time I notice that it gets me better results to harmonize with their work style. |
You sound SO dramatic actually. Demanding "that not be said about me again" is literally inviting it to be said more. You do sound dramatic, people are allowed to think you're dramatic, and if anyone is petty it's your report tattling back to you LOL.
I say petty overall, but not using exclamation points in itself isn't petty or dignified. |
+1. You are being dramatic about not being dramatic. |
Thanks for your reply! Very helpful. The reason he called me dramatic isn’t because I talk to him too much or whatever. It’s because he wants minimal changes to his work that I review. So I accommodated that because I decided to focus on other teams and projects and don’t want to deal with his issues again. |
I don’t see anything wrong with your approach. He didn’t like you so you changed. He probably doesn’t care about it. |
Wait. That is different than the number of exclamation points and pleasantries. You need to be able to address issues with the work product. |
He doesn’t want me to. That’s why he called me dramatic and unilaterally stopped sending me his work. That’s why I leave him alone now and focus on other teams. He has issues with a lot of people so I’m glad I escalated. |