GMU -- letters of rec are "suggested"? Does it matter?

[Anonymous]

I don’t understand posters like this. You ask for opinions, get them, and then complain that you don’t want to hear opinions.

It sounds like you’ve already made up your mind, OP, and were looking for validation. Sorry you didn’t hear what you were hoping for.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you have a 3.8 or higher, and an SAT in the upper 80's percentile.... does it even matter if you don't send letters of recommendation to GMU with your application?

GMU's website says 2 LOR are suggested. As a parent, I don't really have a lot to offer my kid's counselor as a foundation for a counselor's LOR. My DS isn't really "involved" in things. What do you think? Can we just skip this for GMU?

I would say just skip it and see what happens. Why bother?

[Anonymous]

If he’s not concerned about honors college, I he should be fine with no LORs.

[Anonymous]

Don’t half ass any applications.
Do it or don’t.

What kind of attitudes are you transmitting to your kid?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

GMU is the only place DS plans to apply.

I think some of the PPs missed my comment about how DS is not involved in anything. I don't need to hear how this is stupid/short-sighted/my failure as the parent/etc./etc. The reality is, as a student finishing junior year, he was not inclined to "join" anything. He is not in band/chorus/orchestra. He goes to school, and he comes home and codes for his video game, or he plays video games. It is what it is.

So, now that we are looking toward the fall and he intends only to apply to GMU (for com sci), I have very, very little to put on the parent's version of the form that goes to the counselor (to support the LOR). I am aware of the parent's form and the student's form. I did this once before for an older kid who also was not a joiner, but had a somewhat unique interest that was related to her major, plus she had a couple of jobs and volunteer thing that was not related to school. So, I fed the counselor some nuggets to use for the LOR.

But, with DS -- I have very very little. He hasn't had a job. Isn't involved in any extra curriculars. He did a few computer gaming competitions (but ,that's not really something to brag about). OTher than that, he codes. He's pretty smart, but also not ambitious.

So, is it fine to not submit LORs for GMU.

Why did you ask if you literally just told yourself what you wanted to hear?

Counselors are probably better at doing this part of their job than you are. Trust them to come up with something.

I feel bad that you have so little enthusiasm for your own kid. (Maybe that is why he does not have the confidence or curiosity to join things?) Would you wife do a better go with the form?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A lot of the things required for college applications are good developmental pushes for kids anyway. Recognizing that you should be making enough of a connection/impression to ask for a letter of recommendation is a good thing to learn in HS because you'll need to be aware of it during college and beyond too. Pushing yourself to make that somewhat awkward request of a teacher is also good. Likewise writing essays where you communicate who you are and what your goals are. When your kid is planning to go to a fairly easy admit school for their own goals, you're actually in a great position to support their learning--push them to do all the application things on their own because the stakes of having them be slightly sub-optimal doesn't matter.

You sound like a good parent.

[Anonymous]

It’s still probably a good idea to submit an LOR. You can lean hard into the coding and gaming (which are related to comp sci) as his outside interest. You could explain the situation and candidly ask the counselor if they think a LOR would be helpful or even possibly hurtful, but teachers and counselors are very good at using what they have to the best advantage for the student in their LORs.

[Anonymous]

GMU has like 90% acceptance rate. You can probably skip it.

[Anonymous]

So, your kid is going to put all their eggs in one basket and you don’t think it’s worth bothering with a LOR? Okay…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So, your kid is going to put all their eggs in one basket and you don’t think it’s worth bothering with a LOR? Okay…

But it’s GMU.

[Anonymous]

Doesn't matter then (only college applying to) unless he is interested in honors program.

[Anonymous]

There’s only ten spaces in the common app to briefly describe activities. Surely over the past three years your kid has done at least ten things. Break out the time he spends gaming and coding and spin it as relevant toward developing knowledge and expertise in being a computer science major Then itemize individual competitions he has done, the volunteer days, the teaching other kids how to code and game etc. I think you can even list work he did to support the family, like babysitting younger children or chores. The key is to show a portrait of a person passionate about developing knowledge and skills, and sharing that knowledge, in the area of computer science. Given his 3.8 gpa he might be eligible and chosen for scholarships if the school likes his application.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand posters like this. You ask for opinions, get them, and then complain that you don’t want to hear opinions.

It sounds like you’ve already made up your mind, OP, and were looking for validation. Sorry you didn’t hear what you were hoping for.

Well, PPs were giving advice that wasn't applicable. I already know that the counselor needs info from the parent...that's why I put in the original post that I have nothing to provide to the counselor.

He's not applying to other universities, so getting LORs because he'll need them for OTHER universities doesn't answer the question of whether it's OK to skip LORs for GMU when GMU "suggests" 2 LORs.

So if you are going to answer my question, please read it first.

[Anonymous]

If he has a 3.8, there is surely a teacher that would be happy to write him a letter of recommendation.