Teen excessive screen (social media) time

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I would love to hear why some think limiting child's screen time is an easy solution that hurts in the long run. (And I'm not being sarcastic -- I really want to know your rationale.)

For older teens (not younger kids so much) it usually creates the following: 1. Massive power struggle 2. Motivation to sneak around/lie (which all kids do to a degree but kids who constantly get their phone taken/restricted I’ve noticed become almost pathological with it, it’s basically cutting them off from friends) and 3. Leads to parent as enemy in their minds, which often takes years into adulthood to unravel and 4. Unless you can get your kid to see that phone use makes them feel worse they will go right back to high use as soon as they aren’t being restricted, sometimes going overboard in response.

This would be the likely scenario since the girl is so close to moving out for college with all the access she could want and no more chance for mom to be around to physically keep her off. Addicts will go all in and most are addicted to their phone if they're already having issues and need limitations (which is the problem with most of them/us)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The phone is paid for by you not her.

Suspend the phone service turn it off.

This is not hard.

A phone is a privilege not a right.

You can let her have it on the weekends if you don't want it too harsh. However you raised an entitled twat who will fail out of college.

Awww, a parent of a toddler has entered the chat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We give two hours a day to the kids in our family who need help.

I like how you put this. Some 17 years olds don't need the help and it sounds like OP's does.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Screen diet is best done either by getting their buy in, or some sort of event like camping with no cell service or overnight camp where it is circumstances rather than parental restriction. Once you break the cycle you can help them see how much better they feel. Hopefully?

That said, for teens, the solution to this long term is a rich in person life. Lots of activities and lots of friend time. Everyone says “kids don’t hang out in person anymore!!” But that’s totally BS bc both of mine do and so do all the kids in their social circles. A kid who spends that much time glued to social media isn’t going to suddenly replace that time with reading or painting or creative writing while sitting alone in their room…or suddenly spending a ton of time w their parents (which is what some parents seem to think is going to happen if they break the phone addiction), they want connections with peers. That is the replacement that satisfies the same urge to scroll insta

This is the best post so far. Lots and lots of activities. Job if they don't already have one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Screen diet is best done either by getting their buy in, or some sort of event like camping with no cell service or overnight camp where it is circumstances rather than parental restriction. Once you break the cycle you can help them see how much better they feel. Hopefully?

That said, for teens, the solution to this long term is a rich in person life. Lots of activities and lots of friend time. Everyone says “kids don’t hang out in person anymore!!” But that’s totally BS bc both of mine do and so do all the kids in their social circles. A kid who spends that much time glued to social media isn’t going to suddenly replace that time with reading or painting or creative writing while sitting alone in their room…or suddenly spending a ton of time w their parents (which is what some parents seem to think is going to happen if they break the phone addiction), they want connections with peers. That is the replacement that satisfies the same urge to scroll insta

This is the best post so far. Lots and lots of activities. Job if they don't already have one.

Agreed! What does she do after school? She should either be playing a sport or working. Fill that time with something else

[Anonymous]

Can you help her recognize that this much social media time is a problem?

Perhaps you can start modeling as a family no-electronic time and helping her get involved in more activities? Job or volunteering.

[Anonymous]

Replace one addiction with another, like booze

[Anonymous]

I am always interested as to why kids do something. I would have a talk as to why she is spending that much time on SM. I would wonder if she was depressed or avoiding things. I would talk about why grades are low. It would concern me that this behavior points to a larger problem. Taking the phone away solves the issue in the immediate but what about long term? Once the phone is returned, the problem will resurface. What is the underlying issue causing that much phone use and how can she better regulate her time??

[Anonymous]

Don’t you have family sharing screen time set up? It’s such an easy fix