How much is too much for kids sports?

[Anonymous]

My daughter does gymnastics. Forget family dinners. She is one of 3 and seems like everyone has something any night of the week. We get to the gym early, work on homework together, then I leave and pick her up at the end. She loves it. But one of her practice nights is Friday so it's not a school night which helps.

[Anonymous]

It’s gymnastics and I refuse to let my daughters join.

[Anonymous]

Yes, two of my three kids have pursued extracurriculars with this type of commitment from a young age. They love it. Third kid is much more chill and more of a homebody and would never want to.

[Anonymous]

This is definitely not swimming. No team would have a nine-year-old practicing for three hours at a time. It’s gymnastics. OP, I think you’re better off asking people whose kids have done gymnastics or have done gymnastics themselves. Sports like gymnastics and ice-skating seem unique in that they require long hours of practice to master the skills. They are also sports in which girls tend to peak at a young age. I don’t think anyone here can tell you whether your daughter is likely to be the one who ends up with a long and successful, competitive gymnastics career, or one who gets injured, and or burns out in a few years. You probably don’t know that either. I don’t think there’s a right or wrong answer here but I do think you should take your daughter’s goals and preferences into account. I did a different sport and remember arguing with my parents about the time commitment. They felt it was too much. I would’ve been devastated if they had made me quit. That being said, the sport was not one that has such a high injury potential.

[Anonymous]

I have a gymnast and it's a hard decision. I'm coming from the perspective of parenting a kid like my daughter who simply doesn't want to do any other sport even though she's been encouraged to try. Gymnastics is it for her, period. If yours is open to trying other things, I'd lean in on that.

If switching sports isn't a possibility, you could always delay competing for another year or two but you might not be able to delay at the same gym, depending on how full the pre-team is, coaches whims, etc. Also, ageism is a risk - your DD is the perfect age for Level 3 or 4 now, but some gyms are more welcoming to older beginners than others. So it might be worth having a conversation with her coach to see what your options are.

If the travel is a bigger problem than the hours, you could look around for another team that doesn't travel as much or as far, or consider doing Xcel (lower hours, less travel) instead of developmental.

Something else to consider is that some/many kids hit a mental wall around middle school age and start to be scared of skills they've done their entire lives. ex: For a period of time in 6th grade, my daughter refused to do any sort of backwards tumbling at all, just balked whenever she attempted anything, even a simple back handspring. She got over it eventually but she lost time where she should have been learning new skills so it set her back and she repeated the same level the next season. So as kids get older and heavier and taller, they can start to realize that what they're doing is scary. That's why coaches try to get kids through the lower levels as quickly as possible before the dreaded mental blocks start to kick in.

[Anonymous]

Gotta be gymnastics with that schedule. I let my child do it because they love it, but there isn’t time for any other sports.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My daughter has made the team for a sport that she has been doing for many years. She currently does 4 hours of practice a week right now. Practice will be 3 days a week for 3 hours at a time (Mon, Tues, Thursday from 5-8.) She is only 9, currently in 3rd grade. This would be for next school year. Skipping practice is highly discouraged plus travel competitions. This is going to put a strain on our family, miss family dinners, etc. She really wants to do it, and I am actually discouraging it - this isn't a parent living through their kid.

Would you let your kid do it for something they have worked very hard for?

Are most of the kids on the team homeschooled or online schooled? How is this schedule feasible for a child who goes to a traditional school?

[Anonymous]

I would allow it if you can afford it. You shouldn't have let her try out if you didnt intend to go through with it. But be realistic about what it means. She will have to sacrifice other activities. She may have weeks when she doesn't want to go but is committed so has to. Re evaluate after one year if its the right fit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter has made the team for a sport that she has been doing for many years. She currently does 4 hours of practice a week right now. Practice will be 3 days a week for 3 hours at a time (Mon, Tues, Thursday from 5-8.) She is only 9, currently in 3rd grade. This would be for next school year. Skipping practice is highly discouraged plus travel competitions. This is going to put a strain on our family, miss family dinners, etc. She really wants to do it, and I am actually discouraging it - this isn't a parent living through their kid.

Would you let your kid do it for something they have worked very hard for?

Are most of the kids on the team homeschooled or online schooled? How is this schedule feasible for a child who goes to a traditional school?

Huh? What kid is in school from 5 to 8pm in the evening? This doesn't interfere with school at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. We don't let our kids do team sports for this reason. A third grader doing 12 hours a week and traveling? No.

Ironically, the sports OP named were both individual sports. No team sports are pushing 9 year olds that hard

[Anonymous]

At 9 it's doubtful that she has worked very hard for anything.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn’t, not if it put a strain on our family. It’s not worth it. I am assuming it’s gymnastics- she’s about to go through puberty and have a totally different body. As someone who danced and watched friends go through the same thing for gymnastics, it is really painful to suddenly find yourself in a body that isn’t conducive to your beloved sport or suddenly needing to fight your body hard to make it possible. I gave up in middle school. It doesn’t happen to everyone but you don’t know yet if she’s going to be one of the girls who gets wise hips and big boobs and suddenly starts being given extra conditioning all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn’t, not if it put a strain on our family. It’s not worth it. I am assuming it’s gymnastics- she’s about to go through puberty and have a totally different body. As someone who danced and watched friends go through the same thing for gymnastics, it is really painful to suddenly find yourself in a body that isn’t conducive to your beloved sport or suddenly needing to fight your body hard to make it possible. I gave up in middle school. It doesn’t happen to everyone but you don’t know yet if she’s going to be one of the girls who gets wise hips and big boobs and suddenly starts being given extra conditioning all the time.

In which sport are big boobs and hips an asset? Nobody is sitting around waiting to see what type of body they end up with before trying out sports, and certainly being inactive will encourage that body type.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a gymnast and it's a hard decision. I'm coming from the perspective of parenting a kid like my daughter who simply doesn't want to do any other sport even though she's been encouraged to try. Gymnastics is it for her, period. If yours is open to trying other things, I'd lean in on that.

If switching sports isn't a possibility, you could always delay competing for another year or two but you might not be able to delay at the same gym, depending on how full the pre-team is, coaches whims, etc. Also, ageism is a risk - your DD is the perfect age for Level 3 or 4 now, but some gyms are more welcoming to older beginners than others. So it might be worth having a conversation with her coach to see what your options are.

If the travel is a bigger problem than the hours, you could look around for another team that doesn't travel as much or as far, or consider doing Xcel (lower hours, less travel) instead of developmental.

Something else to consider is that some/many kids hit a mental wall around middle school age and start to be scared of skills they've done their entire lives. ex: For a period of time in 6th grade, my daughter refused to do any sort of backwards tumbling at all, just balked whenever she attempted anything, even a simple back handspring. She got over it eventually but she lost time where she should have been learning new skills so it set her back and she repeated the same level the next season. So as kids get older and heavier and taller, they can start to realize that what they're doing is scary. That's why coaches try to get kids through the lower levels as quickly as possible before the dreaded mental blocks start to kick in.

OPs daughter may very well be in the Xcel program which is more recreational. All these downsides are less relevant.

[Anonymous]

Wow and I thought the 5 hours we put into hockey plus travel was a lot. 9 hours a week would kill my soul. Not to mention she wouldn’t be able to do anything else and neither could we. I’d hard pass unless she had possible Olympic potential.