When it comes to your baby, what are you most obsessive about?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The education obsession is a little over the top. I grew up in the country, went to the local state school (there were no other schools and no one had a choice!) A good number of us ended up at top colleges and ended up working as lawyers, doctors, bankers etc (not that that is any measure of 'success'). Schooling (certainly under the age of 10) just isn't worth being obsessed about - waste of energy!

I don't find planning ahead a waste. I surely haven't picked out his college-but have chosen his pre-school and elementary school. We'll be SOL if we wait until he's 3 to start doing our homework.

[Anonymous]

Safety/choking is a major worry. And being a good enough mom to my kids. And helping them develop a healthy self esteem. I'm not so worried about education. The public schools in my county are great and I know my kids will get a good education. I don't care where they go to college, as long as they're fulfilling their own personal goals and have something in their lives that they feel passionate about.

[Anonymous]

I tend to worry a lot, so it's hard to pick one thing!

As far as now, the constant concerns seem to be sleeping and eating. Is it enough, too much, the right kind? Am I doing what I can so that he will have good sleeping and eating habits?

Longer term, I worry about his safety, education and being able to have a happy childhood. I stress when I read about the amount of testing and homework in schools today. I worry when I hear that arts, gym, recess and music are being cut back or eliminated. I worry when I hear about gangs in the area and guns in school. It seems so much scarier than when I grew up. I also hope that DH and I stay healthy to see our little boy grow up (since we had him in our late 30's, more the norm today, but still a concern).

[Anonymous]

Sadly, I obsess about how many hours I spend every day with DD. Unfortunately for me, I work full-time and at the end of each day I count the amount of waking hours down to the half hour that I spent with DD in comparison to how many waking hours the nanny spent with her. At the end of each week I tally up again for myself vs. the nanny. Some weeks I come out ahead of the nanny (due to weekends) and some weeks it's pathetic. I know that sounds weird, but my heart is constantly breaking every time I think about the fact that I pay another woman to do what I wish were my job....well, what IS my job but I can't do.

[Anonymous]

Mostly health and happiness. I also worry about whether he will like and respect me as an individual, not just love me as a mom, when he gets older. Because my husband and I are somewhat older (37), I wonder if he's going to think we're a couple of old farts he can't relate to. I don't think that's the case, since we are both young at heart and active, but I still worry about it.

[Anonymous]

Under my husband's "conservation of worry" theory, one can only worry so much at once. I used to obsess over the fact that DS #1 was not talking, did he need speech therapy, what should I do? Then he started talking in paragraphs. I vowed then and there to focus my worry at work. I honestly can't think of anything substantial (you know, the lie awake in bed thinking about it type) I've worried about with either of my kids now in months. I know my husband appreciates this, and I suspect it has a positive influence on the kids too, because I'm more relaxed with them.

[Anonymous]

I worry about drugs. It may sound silly because my children are so young, but I have seen what drugs can do to a family and the child using. It really scares me. Wish I could go live on a desolated island during the danger years. (middle school).

[Anonymous]

I worry so very much that no matter how much I teach him to be a good, kind, giving and honest human being (to everyone, everywhere) that someone is going to hurt him...hurt him badly and I will not be able to repair his body or mind. In short, that someone will take away his sense of trust and innocence.

[Anonymous]

My children are grown - thank goodness - but I just wanted to say to all of you that I find all of your worries and guilt trips to be perfectly normal and acceptable. The only thing that is not acceptable is the passing along of these adult concerns to your children. And also - it does get easier as they get older. I'm at the point now where instead of worrying about their driving, I'm worrying about them criticising MY driving!

[Anonymous]

I am obsessed about giving them their childhood, and not caving to the societal pressures of over-scheduling their days.

[Anonymous]

I truly obsess over how I'm going to maintain a fun and healthy relationship with my DD as she gets older. She is world to us right now and she adores us..but we know all too well that changes when they become older. I want to have a great relationship with her and want her to want me in her life forever.

[Anonymous]

I have daughters and worry so much about "Mean Girls" at school. I remember all too well how cruel girls can be, and to make things worse, I work near an elementary school that uses a city block for recess so I watch it happen all the time. I hope my daughters aren't the one that gets excluded and I hope they can help to make sure it doesn't happen to anyone else in their classes.

[Anonymous]

Autism; vaccines; does he watch too much TV? Why doesn't he eat more? (He's 2, btw).