School psychologist called me...

[Anonymous]

Of course. Lunch bunches are great and all schools should have smaller, quieter spaces for the kids who don’t like the hustle and bustle of lunchtime.

[Anonymous]

All the kids think lunch bunch is fun, OP.

[Anonymous]

Yes! My third grader is in a lunch bunch as both a role model and a learner. The kids have no idea that any “work” is happening and everyone wants in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I got the exact same call 15 years ago. So funny.

Anyway, let him do it once; but honestly, the other kids start to figure this out, and the super savvy girls start to ostracize these kids by 3rd or 4th grade. It is great for the kids who need it, but if yours doesn't, there is no good reason to create the impression among classmates that they do. For my kid it became sort of a self-fulfilling prophecy. Suddenly, he was being bullied and did need it.

The appropriate response to kids ostracizing others is not to get the victim to act differently. The bullies should be taught to be kind or else face consequences.

[Anonymous]

The kids LoVE 💕 lunch bunches. The 6th grade teachers are offering them this year and it’s a real prize to be selected. Everyone is scrambling to get out of that smelly, loud lunch room and into a quiet room with friends. They even get to play a game together over lunch. It’s quite the special lunch. Kids are begging to be invited.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I got the exact same call 15 years ago. So funny.

Anyway, let him do it once; but honestly, the other kids start to figure this out, and the super savvy girls start to ostracize these kids by 3rd or 4th grade. It is great for the kids who need it, but if yours doesn't, there is no good reason to create the impression among classmates that they do. For my kid it became sort of a self-fulfilling prophecy. Suddenly, he was being bullied and did need it.

The appropriate response to kids ostracizing others is not to get the victim to act differently. The bullies should be taught to be kind or else face consequences.

+1000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The kids LoVE 💕 lunch bunches. The 6th grade teachers are offering them this year and it’s a real prize to be selected. Everyone is scrambling to get out of that smelly, loud lunch room and into a quiet room with friends. They even get to play a game together over lunch. It’s quite the special lunch. Kids are begging to be invited.

The main goal for these lunches is to help children who have difficulty with social issues. It’s a therapeutic half hour that helps relieve the stress that these children feel about being on the outside looking in.

I only hope that kids looking for fun aren’t taking away from the children who need it. If a quiet lunch room would help the kids who hate the noise but are ok socially they should start a petition to get a quiet room or at least a partitioned area of the room.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes. I think it is lovely.

He just saw other kids getting to do something, and he is curious and wants to do it. Probably a sign of intelligence and openness and an admirable level of engagement with people.

??? More like these kids think they are missing out on something. They can just quit when no longer interested unlike the kids struggling with social skills.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, of course. What are you worried about?

Plus 1

[Anonymous]

I think it’s a sign of reasonably good social skills because he was advocating for himself with an adult. I asked for a lunch bunch recently because my daughter was reporting negative interactions and feelings about herself. The interesting thing about it was her teacher hadn’t noticed anything - it made me wonder if I was reinforcing something more negative with my questions and sympathetic responses at home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I got the exact same call 15 years ago. So funny.

Anyway, let him do it once; but honestly, the other kids start to figure this out, and the super savvy girls start to ostracize these kids by 3rd or 4th grade. It is great for the kids who need it, but if yours doesn't, there is no good reason to create the impression among classmates that they do. For my kid it became sort of a self-fulfilling prophecy. Suddenly, he was being bullied and did need it.

This wasn’t our experience at all. My kid did lunch bunch stuff through 5th grade. I’m pretty sure she was included to be there as a nice person for other kids who struggled a bit, but if the counselor thought my kid was the struggling one then it is great she was included. All the girls who were invited loved it. They loved the counselor. They loved not being in the cafeteria. And I never, ever heard of anyone being made fun over it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Of course. I agree kids see lunch bunches as a treat. There’s no problem with letting him do it. And please don’t tell him it’s just for kids who need help.

Yes, my super social DD loved the counselor lunch bunches when she was in ES. In her mind those were the gold standard lunch bunches and she went as often as she could. She has zero social issues, other than she could stand to be less social!

[Anonymous]

You are reading too much into it OP. Not a big deal and lunch bunches are a fun treat for kids.

[Anonymous]

My kids did some of these. They often attended as a “guest” of a classmate who was going. They basically had no social struggles except for DD at the very end of 5th due to a bully. There was never a stigma because at some point in time most students attended. Like your son, the kids would often approach the counselor to participate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s a sign of reasonably good social skills because he was advocating for himself with an adult. I asked for a lunch bunch recently because my daughter was reporting negative interactions and feelings about herself. The interesting thing about it was her teacher hadn’t noticed anything - it made me wonder if I was reinforcing something more negative with my questions and sympathetic responses at home.

This is one of the reasons lunch bunch was created. My daughter had lunch bunch because she was new in second grade. She met her best friend there who was also new.