Thank you cards for kid birthdays

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If someone takes the time to bring you a gift, you take the time to thank them. In writing. That's the rule in our home

As someone who grew up with a mother who read Emily Post Etiquette for fun, I love you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids do not, only because it impossible to give them to the other kid without mailing them or without giving them out in school and possibly making any uninvited kids feel bad.

I email or text the parent a thank you with a photo of our kids at the party or a photo of my kid with their gift as he opened it.

If it's an unsolicited gift (not given at a birthday party), then yes, my kid does a thank you card.

Why can't you mail them?

[Anonymous]

Yes - I had the kids write them (or helped them) when they were little and they did it themselves when they were older. They still write them as young adults for gifts and nice gestures. I personally feel it's a good habit to encourage - expressing gratitude makes all parties feel good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids do not, only because it impossible to give them to the other kid without mailing them or without giving them out in school and possibly making any uninvited kids feel bad.

I email or text the parent a thank you with a photo of our kids at the party or a photo of my kid with their gift as he opened it.

If it's an unsolicited gift (not given at a birthday party), then yes, my kid does a thank you card.

Why can't you mail them?

NP. I don’t have the mailing address for any of my kids’ classmates, only phone numbers at best. I had my kid give thank you cards during pickup/drop off chaos so it wasn’t disruptive.

[Anonymous]

OMG. This gets posted all the darn time.

If the child opens the presents at the birthday party, and says "thank you" right then to the person who gave the gift, you don't need to do written thank-you cards.

Written thank you cards serve two purposes. They acknowledge the gift -- if the person wasn't there to see you open it, they now know you got it. And they thank the person. If the gift is opened in person, the first purpose isn't necessary, they literally watched you open the gift, and the second isn't either -- you already said thank you. So it makes little sense to send thank you cards to people who watched you receive a gift and who already heard you say "thank you."

Think of the classic example of the gift thank you card ... it's for wedding gifts. Wedding gifts are either mailed to the bride, or, if brought to the wedding, put on a gift table and then opened by the bride and groom later, after the party. Under those circumstances the bride and groom need to let the person who gave the gift know that they actually got it, and they need to thank the person.

Kids sending thank you cards for gifts they opened right in front of the person is pretentious and generally reflects a parental lack of understanding with regard to etiquette. If the child doesn't open the gifts at the party and say thank you in person, then that is another story. But usually they do open them.

[Anonymous]

I’m impressed with the parents who still do thank you notes. My daughter wouldn’t do them in middle school because she said nobody did them and she would just make people feel bad. She’s right about no one doing them in middle school but I still wanted to do them anyway. I did worry about embarrassing some mothers. I don’t know.

[Anonymous]

A lot of times the favor bag at the party has a Thank You For Coming to My Party note. Most people do not send a thank you note after the fact. Over the past 2 years of parties, we have received only 2 thank you notes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OMG. This gets posted all the darn time.

If the child opens the presents at the birthday party, and says "thank you" right then to the person who gave the gift, you don't need to do written thank-you cards.

Written thank you cards serve two purposes. They acknowledge the gift -- if the person wasn't there to see you open it, they now know you got it. And they thank the person. If the gift is opened in person, the first purpose isn't necessary, they literally watched you open the gift, and the second isn't either -- you already said thank you. So it makes little sense to send thank you cards to people who watched you receive a gift and who already heard you say "thank you."

Think of the classic example of the gift thank you card ... it's for wedding gifts. Wedding gifts are either mailed to the bride, or, if brought to the wedding, put on a gift table and then opened by the bride and groom later, after the party. Under those circumstances the bride and groom need to let the person who gave the gift know that they actually got it, and they need to thank the person.

Kids sending thank you cards for gifts they opened right in front of the person is pretentious and generally reflects a parental lack of understanding with regard to etiquette. If the child doesn't open the gifts at the party and say thank you in person, then that is another story. But usually they do open them.

First, kids do not open presents at parties for so many reasons (boring for attendees, attendees who are children can become jealous of presents, attendees who give less expensive gifts can be made to feel bad bday party kid could have a less than stellar reaction to a gift, did I mention how awful and boring for attendees, and on and on).

Second, you were clearly raised in a barn, because this is NOT the rule (according to all kinds of etiquette). You are just wrong

[Anonymous]

My kid is little but I write them for her and sometimes he scribbles something on the note. Occasionally something has shown up and I'm not sure who gave it, and I feel badly about that, but I just hope people aren't offended. We only receive thank yous about half the time, and I don't really worry about it.

When my kid is old enough, I do plan to teach him to write his own notes.

[Anonymous]

Yes, I sent them for her first two birthdays.

Then for her third and fourth birthdays, I wrote the cards and she signed her name.

For her 5th last year, she wrote all the cards herself with help from me on spelling. "Birthday party" and "thank you" were some of the first words she could read and write.

[Anonymous]

This post is going to attract people who send them. My experience is for big parties, people don’t. I’ve probably gone to 20 or so kid birthday parties in the last year between my two kids and gotten one thank you card from a friend who is a self proclaimed stationary and mail lover who did them herself for her four year old. If it’s something you enjoy, go for it, but it’s not needed and not expected. I do make my kids send them to grandma, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A lot of times the favor bag at the party has a Thank You For Coming to My Party note. Most people do not send a thank you note after the fact. Over the past 2 years of parties, we have received only 2 thank you notes.

That is not a thank you note for the gift!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OMG. This gets posted all the darn time.

If the child opens the presents at the birthday party, and says "thank you" right then to the person who gave the gift, you don't need to do written thank-you cards.

Written thank you cards serve two purposes. They acknowledge the gift -- if the person wasn't there to see you open it, they now know you got it. And they thank the person. If the gift is opened in person, the first purpose isn't necessary, they literally watched you open the gift, and the second isn't either -- you already said thank you. So it makes little sense to send thank you cards to people who watched you receive a gift and who already heard you say "thank you."

Think of the classic example of the gift thank you card ... it's for wedding gifts. Wedding gifts are either mailed to the bride, or, if brought to the wedding, put on a gift table and then opened by the bride and groom later, after the party. Under those circumstances the bride and groom need to let the person who gave the gift know that they actually got it, and they need to thank the person.

Kids sending thank you cards for gifts they opened right in front of the person is pretentious and generally reflects a parental lack of understanding with regard to etiquette. If the child doesn't open the gifts at the party and say thank you in person, then that is another story. But usually they do open them.

Well. Next time I'll send a photo of the gift we were going to give since no one needs to write a thank you for an actual gift.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids do not, only because it impossible to give them to the other kid without mailing them or without giving them out in school and possibly making any uninvited kids feel bad.

I email or text the parent a thank you with a photo of our kids at the party or a photo of my kid with their gift as he opened it.

If it's an unsolicited gift (not given at a birthday party), then yes, my kid does a thank you card.

Then mail them.

[Anonymous]

Yes, my kids do.