Job description of parent of adult child

[Anonymous]

Your primary job is to get them to launch, if they’re capable of launching.

Oh, and to love them despite bad decisions etc

[Anonymous]

I was living on a different continent by that age with zero support from my family. Only talked to them for 10 minutes twice a month.

I have a 14 year old who has special needs and I expect he will need me beyond 21 in various ways.

Both of those scenarios are ok.

[Anonymous]

I just had this discussion with my almost 30 year old.

He is launched. Lives with his GF, decent job etc.

I am one of those mothers who sometimes doesn't realize my kids want to vent but not advice. I am working on it.

My DS has a school loan for graduate school. We paid all undergrad expenses. He doesn't want any help paying it back. However it kills me he is prob only making the min payment and will sell his car to afford other stuff like dog training for his crazy dog. And not pay down that loan. UGH

He never asks us for money. He has worked two jobs many times, hard worker. But sometimes I want to just scream what are you doing.....

And he is a great son he calls us all the time just to chat. If we needed him he would be there in a heart beat. Yet when he calls I have PTSD from some dumb short sided decison he has made....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your primary job is to get them to launch, if they’re capable of launching.

Oh, and to love them despite bad decisions etc

This is so hard....
I have ptsd from some of those bad decisions and in the scheme of things we are supper lucky money that we could easily afford could fix most of them

Bud sometimes those dumb decisions make me so mad..... UGH.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just had this discussion with my almost 30 year old.

He is launched. Lives with his GF, decent job etc.

I am one of those mothers who sometimes doesn't realize my kids want to vent but not advice. I am working on it.

My DS has a school loan for graduate school. We paid all undergrad expenses. He doesn't want any help paying it back. However it kills me he is prob only making the min payment and will sell his car to afford other stuff like dog training for his crazy dog. And not pay down that loan. UGH

He never asks us for money. He has worked two jobs many times, hard worker. But sometimes I want to just scream what are you doing.....

And he is a great son he calls us all the time just to chat. If we needed him he would be there in a heart beat. Yet when he calls I have PTSD from some dumb short sided decison he has made....

I'd pick my dog over my car too Don't worry about him. If he loves the dog that much, the dog will encourage him to strive for more when he would normally be settled and complacent. He'll want to make more money to get a fenced yard, to get a bigger place, and own instead of rent so he won't need to worry about pets being allowed.

[Anonymous]

23 and 21. 23 year old graduated college early and took a job out of state . He’s recently moved back locally. Youngest will be graduating at the end of the year.

We are here to guide them and help them figure things out as best we can. If they need to move back with us for a time to get back on their feet after a set back, save up to buy a house, etc they will be welcomed to. We really enjoy them both. They’re good kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounding board

Emergency help

Watch the grandkids in a pickle

Help plan and fund the wedding

Any mental health interventions

I like this one.