| My 8 year with the same diagnosis had a really good night. But I was braced for the worst and can totally sympathize. Its OK OP! Youre not alone. |
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OP I was ready to cry last night because my kid with the same diagnosis and just a little younger was so wild, yelling and running into the street and I was way too harsh with them. They get hyped up every year and I just wish I could enjoy how cute they are. Our NT (as far as I know) neighbor was also on behavior I didn’t like so it’s hard to say what is attributable to a diagnosis. My NT child is sweet and cute on Halloween and it’s hard to stop the comparisons (though I do try).
And I’ve been there where your kids meltdown is being seen and you want to cry. My kid is always embarrassed afterwards and it’s definitely not typical at this age. I’m mostly upset with myself for not accepting my kid and getting frustrated and not as kind as I want to be. I want my kids to have a good holiday. Halloween and Christmas are the worst in terms of bad behavior and expectations not being met. I guess I’ll start working now on my plan for Christmas |
| My now YA, anxious adhd/asd kid had a lot of Halloween meltdowns. The worst were the two times in their tween years they were abandoned by their group several blocks from home. Really soured them on going out. |
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Hugs OP! I give you our collective permission to hate Halloween from here on out!! (It’s also how I feel about Thanksgiving with the extended family expectations.) It’s making a neurodivergent kid perform, in a high pressure situation with a huge audience. The day(s) after continue to be hard for you because it’s NOT fun and then people everywhere want to ask you how much fun it was, and talk about how much fun they had, blah blah blah.
For me, the favorite family days are the chill ones… holidays rank so far below… feel free to snap pics and feel joyful instead on like, Nov 5 or whatever day your family’s next great day is! Wishing a happy and normal November 2nd to all who celebrate 🤪🤪🤪 |
| Sorry OP, I see you. Sometimes "social stories" about events help, if you want to try something different in prepping DC for events. And sometimes one has to just sit it out... Good vibes to you. |
This x 100. My DD has had wonderful Halloweens and really bad ones. Last night was a net positive, with a LOT of anxiety (mostly absorbed by us parents) but she managed to pull herself together enough to get through all the activities. |
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As kids get older, Halloween can be very stressful or anxiety producing for kids, special needs or not. This year it was my NT kid crying at the end of the night. Luckily after friends left, but I would not put pressure on this to be a "favorite holiday" anymore.
Halloween is over stimulating, lots of sugar, lots of social interaction, and then as they get older all the drama of who they are trick or treating with, kids feeling left out, running around all night, eating candy, all after a long school day, the talk of Halloween at school, stress over what to dress up as. Now that my kids are tweens/teens, I can say Halloween has become one of my LEAST favorite holidays. More years than not, at least one kid has a meltdown either leading up to it or the night of. |