The deflated grading is just exhausting.

[Anonymous]

I'm convinced the point is: to learn to handle pressure. Intense pressure because this is how, this echelon of students, will advance in the adult world of work. Making hard choices, working at maximum efficiency, managing stress at the highest professional levels. I don't believe it's generally about the mastery of subject matter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't think this person is humble bragging. And I think it's reasonable to expect that if your kid gets in for 9th grade, they are not going to spend junior year battling against 65s and 75s. I have the sinking feeling my kid goes to this school, and it makes me sad to think what's ahead, but like you, no one telegraphed this to me. I guess it's a lesson in finding balance in life, but it's too bad it has to come so early, and with the potential threat of a demoralizing grade after a mere 3, instead of 4, hours of work.

I knew this about your school when my child - and OP’s - applied. OP didn’t do their research.

Now you know. You actually know. Yet you look forward to complaining about it a few years down the road instead of changing schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid goes to a Big3. Junior year.
The deflated grading feels worse than ever this year and is just exhausting. My kid does homework for 4 hours per night. Some nights it's even more.
Goes in and takes exams. Averages on a recent math exam: 70. Average on a recent science exam: 65. Average on a recent history exam: 85.
Doing well just seems impossible, stress is so high. There are no retakes, no curving, etc. We know from experience that a few kids will end eek their way up to a 90% with lab reports, quizzes, perhaps a better second test. My kid is among these. But many won't. They'll get a straight B or B- in the class even with maximum effort. And then a 5 on the AP exam.
In some classes only 1 or 2 kids will end up above a 90. There is just so much stress and I don't understand why it has to be this hard.
Why take a cohort of very bright, very hardworking kids and then give a straight B as the average (and a tiny handful of low A's across the grade?) It's just exhausting.
I'm not sure what the point it. College admissions aren't even that great--colleges are no longer buying this "a 3.5 is a good GPA!" line.
It's just too far out of the norm of what every other type of school is doing.

I don’t think your kid may be a good fit at a Big 3. It doesn’t mean they are not smart but Big 3s are not for everyone. 65 and 75s are very low. I get it it is a lot of work and not enough time with other commitments. Please don’t add stress to your kid and reassure them it is okay and that Bs are okay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid goes to a Big3. Junior year.
The deflated grading feels worse than ever this year and is just exhausting. My kid does homework for 4 hours per night. Some nights it's even more.
Goes in and takes exams. Averages on a recent math exam: 70. Average on a recent science exam: 65. Average on a recent history exam: 85.
Doing well just seems impossible, stress is so high. There are no retakes, no curving, etc. We know from experience that a few kids will end eek their way up to a 90% with lab reports, quizzes, perhaps a better second test. My kid is among these. But many won't. They'll get a straight B or B- in the class even with maximum effort. And then a 5 on the AP exam.
In some classes only 1 or 2 kids will end up above a 90. There is just so much stress and I don't understand why it has to be this hard.
Why take a cohort of very bright, very hardworking kids and then give a straight B as the average (and a tiny handful of low A's across the grade?) It's just exhausting.
I'm not sure what the point it. College admissions aren't even that great--colleges are no longer buying this "a 3.5 is a good GPA!" line.
It's just too far out of the norm of what every other type of school is doing.

I don’t think your kid may be a good fit at a Big 3. It doesn’t mean they are not smart but Big 3s are not for everyone. 65 and 75s are very low. I get it it is a lot of work and not enough time with other commitments. Please don’t add stress to your kid and reassure them it is okay and that Bs are okay.

Those are the averages for the class, not my kid's scores.

[Anonymous]

NCS?

[Anonymous]

OP - I hear you. It makes for an awful HS experience.

[Anonymous]

Why is he there OP? If you live near decent public schools, send him there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is he there OP? If you live near decent public schools, send him there.

Public is worse. Our public AP class 90% quizzes and no retakes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is he there OP? If you live near decent public schools, send him there.

Public is worse. Our public AP class 90% quizzes and no retakes.

how is a 90% grade (an A) worse?

[Anonymous]

GDS

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is he there OP? If you live near decent public schools, send him there.

OP here. We had some long and complex conversations about this. Kid ultimately decided to stay as she (student is a girl) has been there for 5 years and all friends are there. It's not socially ideal to transfer for the last 2 years of high school plus the curriculums don't align all that well. Plus the private transcript is all wonky with limited APs and honors, imperfect grades, etc. it seemed better to keep going (again, mainly because that is what the kid wants for friendship reasons). If kid was younger and I knew what I know now I would transfer her. I actually regret sending her there and consider it a pretty big parenting misstep--it was her idea but I agreed to it, helped her apply, etc. Our younger kid has stuck with public.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is he there OP? If you live near decent public schools, send him there.

Public is worse. Our public AP class 90% quizzes and no retakes.

how is a 90% grade (an A) worse?

90% of the grade is quizzes and tests. No make up. Class work and homework is 10% of grade and you can have retakes on that only. Quizzes are sometimes two questions so if you miss one you fail.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is he there OP? If you live near decent public schools, send him there.

OP here. We had some long and complex conversations about this. Kid ultimately decided to stay as she (student is a girl) has been there for 5 years and all friends are there. It's not socially ideal to transfer for the last 2 years of high school plus the curriculums don't align all that well. Plus the private transcript is all wonky with limited APs and honors, imperfect grades, etc. it seemed better to keep going (again, mainly because that is what the kid wants for friendship reasons). If kid was younger and I knew what I know now I would transfer her. I actually regret sending her there and consider it a pretty big parenting misstep--it was her idea but I agreed to it, helped her apply, etc. Our younger kid has stuck with public.

I agree that it is too late. However, I suffered through this school, too, and that was when the toll was just on your mental health, not on your college results, too. My hope is that parents read these posts and take it all in before placing their daughters in this context. I'm sorry, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
The point of going to a top 3 school is to get a demanding, rigorous education.

If you’re not happy with it, switch to public or Maret or field or someplace like that.

Was your child admitted early, like in kindergarten or elementary? Maybe it’s not the right fit.

Bs are one thing by getting multiple scores like 75 or 65 could be a sign your kid shouldn’t be of the school.

I tire The people who get their kids into super progress schools and then complain that they are too rigorous.

OP here. No, kid was admitted in 9th. Has straight As (some version of them) so far but at such a high cost.
The 65s and 75s are class averages. My kids is above average but still below an A. Will probably eek out As again with a little luck and an immense amount of work.
But the stress getting to that point is so, so high and most peers are not getting As. Playing this game is getting old. Studying for hours and hours
and still getting a B or C on every exam because that is how things are written. When essay exams are graded so that the average is an 82 and only 2 kids get above a 90 (had one of these recently). I guess I get it if a math exam an 82 average. But why grade an essay exam to an 82?
(when your entire cohort can write and has read ALL the material and discussed it in class for weeks, etc).

The problem is that you are expecting your kid to get a public school gpa, probably because he was in public school through eighth. Stop putting that pressure on him. It is fine to get As and Bs at a big three. Aiming for straight As at a big three is unrealistic and ridiculous for most kids. Get over that goal.

yes, but a couple of Bs and a GPA quickly trends down to a 3.5 or thereabouts...
and kids at the 75th percentile or below in the class are increasingly having a hard time getting into decent colleges.

what i don't understand is why the schools don't help out their own kids. They are in charge of the grading. They don't have to grade an essay to an average of an 82 and give half the class a final grade of a straight B or lower And then turn around and wonder why their kids with under a 3.5 can't get into Penn State.

You didn’t understand when you sit your kid to a big three that they have higher academic standards than a public school?

You just seem to want the name of the private school in the education of the private school but without actually having the education record of the private school. The point of the schools is do you have to work really hard and that they are very rigorous. If you didn’t want that for your kid, you should’ve stayed in public. These are hard schools. That’s the point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is he there OP? If you live near decent public schools, send him there.

OP here. We had some long and complex conversations about this. Kid ultimately decided to stay as she (student is a girl) has been there for 5 years and all friends are there. It's not socially ideal to transfer for the last 2 years of high school plus the curriculums don't align all that well. Plus the private transcript is all wonky with limited APs and honors, imperfect grades, etc. it seemed better to keep going (again, mainly because that is what the kid wants for friendship reasons). If kid was younger and I knew what I know now I would transfer her. I actually regret sending her there and consider it a pretty big parenting misstep--it was her idea but I agreed to it, helped her apply, etc. Our younger kid has stuck with public.

How could she have been there for 5 years if she was admitted at ninth?