Protecting assets for end of life care in context of a second marriage

[Anonymous]

Does your parent want to do this, or do you want to do this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your parent has spent all of their assets, unless you live in a jurisdiction that has and enforced filial responsibility, you wouldn’t be footing the bill for anything unless you want to offer the new spouse an “upgrade” from whatever Medicaid has to offer.

Right. My parent has enough for a comfortable retirement and end of life care. My goal is to help them preserve that and not spend down their assets on their new spouse. For what it's worth, new spouse also has means, as do their kids. Just looking for ideas on how to help, but recognizing my help may not be wanted. If my parent is open to going with me or one of my siblings to talk to an elder law specialist, should we be asking about a certain kind of trust, for example (I doubt an irrevocable one is going to be well received)? And can an already married person put assets in a trust without the consent of their spouse?

Marriage is a commitment to do just that though. It's joining two people to become one. If your parent wants to get married, this is what they are choosing to do. Is your parent mentally competent to make this choice? If yes, then back off. If no, then get them declared mentally incompetent and they will not be allowed to enter a legally binding contract like marriage, and their money will be safe.

If your parent starts spending their money on a spouse's care, you can make it clear that you won't be able to support for parent should they spend all their money (this would be fine to do if your parents were still married too).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your parent has spent all of their assets, unless you live in a jurisdiction that has and enforced filial responsibility, you wouldn’t be footing the bill for anything unless you want to offer the new spouse an “upgrade” from whatever Medicaid has to offer.

Right. My parent has enough for a comfortable retirement and end of life care. My goal is to help them preserve that and not spend down their assets on their new spouse. For what it's worth, new spouse also has means, as do their kids. Just looking for ideas on how to help, but recognizing my help may not be wanted. If my parent is open to going with me or one of my siblings to talk to an elder law specialist, should we be asking about a certain kind of trust, for example (I doubt an irrevocable one is going to be well received)? And can an already married person put assets in a trust without the consent of their spouse?

Marriage is a commitment to do just that though. It's joining two people to become one. If your parent wants to get married, this is what they are choosing to do. Is your parent mentally competent to make this choice? If yes, then back off. If no, then get them declared mentally incompetent and they will not be allowed to enter a legally binding contract like marriage, and their money will be safe.

If your parent starts spending their money on a spouse's care, you can make it clear that you won't be able to support for parent should they spend all their money (this would be fine to do if your parents were still married too).

Of course. The point is, if the parent is married they have the OBLIGATION to pay for their spouse's care, whether that spouse is the parent of their children or not.
Maybe their are some legal loopholes like the OP wants, but seeking them out makes them a garbage person.

[Anonymous]

They can’t take your house. So you can tie money up in a house.

Look into Life Estate and an irrevocable trust.