Jeans as a turn-on

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do you hope to get by bringing this up OP? Do you want to get her to wear jeans to satisfy your own preferences? I have always strongly reacted to men trying to control what I wear - it’s a real trigger for me. So tread carefully. I would be really, really offput if you presented it as some kind of generic expectation for what “sexy women do”; and I would also be mighty annoyed if you started pawing at me every time I put on a freakin’ pair of jeans.

Most/all women wear jeans from time to time - that should be enough for you.

If you don’t want to be with a guy who has a preference on how you dress, then wouldn’t you rather he bring it up early, so you can both move on?

yes, but there are generally other tells that he has retrograde gender role ideas.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do you hope to get by bringing this up OP? Do you want to get her to wear jeans to satisfy your own preferences? I have always strongly reacted to men trying to control what I wear - it’s a real trigger for me. So tread carefully. I would be really, really offput if you presented it as some kind of generic expectation for what “sexy women do”; and I would also be mighty annoyed if you started pawing at me every time I put on a freakin’ pair of jeans.

Most/all women wear jeans from time to time - that should be enough for you.

He never mentioned anything about what " sexy women do". He finds women in jeans very sexy. These are too different things

It's okay though. If he met a woman like you, it won't work out, and that is fine. Isn't dating for finding someone compatible?

Generally women wouldn't mind having a partner who finds some pieces of clothing on them particularly hot. There is just a time and way to bring it up.

I love my DH's legs in jeans. I love him with a beard. He made sure to grow a beard for our wedding day.

hard to tell if OP feels he is entitled to women looking sexy in the way he wants, or just likes jeans. There is definitely a species of men who feel like women should look a certain way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would like it.

I have always kind of been attracted to guys who are a little narcissistic though. I mean, not “narcs” as described on this forum, so are really antisocial psychopaths, but guys who feel like they can achieve and get what they want in life. I would find it sexy to know that he thought I was sexy in jeans.

Words have meaning. That's nothing a little " narcissistic" about this.

Some of you wonder how you end up in dysfunctional relationships.

Okay, I guess I mean it clinically. I am generally attracted to men who have a narcissistic personality organization and a healthy or neurotic level of functioning.
I think it’s hot when men have dreams and believe they can achieve them. And I would find it sexy to be told what he likes about my clothes or my body. Even early in dating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do you hope to get by bringing this up OP? Do you want to get her to wear jeans to satisfy your own preferences? I have always strongly reacted to men trying to control what I wear - it’s a real trigger for me. So tread carefully. I would be really, really offput if you presented it as some kind of generic expectation for what “sexy women do”; and I would also be mighty annoyed if you started pawing at me every time I put on a freakin’ pair of jeans.

Most/all women wear jeans from time to time - that should be enough for you.

If you don’t want to be with a guy who has a preference on how you dress, then wouldn’t you rather he bring it up early, so you can both move on?

yes, but there are generally other tells that he has retrograde gender role ideas.

Yeah. Please leave the guys who start “pawing you every time you put on a freakin pair of jeans” to those of us who like to be pawed .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do you hope to get by bringing this up OP? Do you want to get her to wear jeans to satisfy your own preferences? I have always strongly reacted to men trying to control what I wear - it’s a real trigger for me. So tread carefully. I would be really, really offput if you presented it as some kind of generic expectation for what “sexy women do”; and I would also be mighty annoyed if you started pawing at me every time I put on a freakin’ pair of jeans.

Most/all women wear jeans from time to time - that should be enough for you.

He never mentioned anything about what " sexy women do". He finds women in jeans very sexy. These are too different things

It's okay though. If he met a woman like you, it won't work out, and that is fine. Isn't dating for finding someone compatible?

Generally women wouldn't mind having a partner who finds some pieces of clothing on them particularly hot. There is just a time and way to bring it up.

I love my DH's legs in jeans. I love him with a beard. He made sure to grow a beard for our wedding day.

hard to tell if OP feels he is entitled to women looking sexy in the way he wants, or just likes jeans. There is definitely a species of men who feel like women should look a certain way.

OP has not given any evidence that he falls into that group.

But I see why you are trying to emphasize so he can make sure he is not giving that kind of vibe.

[Anonymous]

Don't make this a discussion. It's fine to have preferences, but you have to let them be known in the right way.

When she is wearing jeans, you say, "you look amazing in those jeans."

You don't say - "I have a preference for women in jeans."

[Anonymous]

OP here; no feeling of entitlement at all how my partner should look! That’s ridiculous haha.

It’s just a personal preference I guess and something I find attractive. Would never be pushy about it at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here; no feeling of entitlement at all how my partner should look! That’s ridiculous haha.

It’s just a personal preference I guess and something I find attractive. Would never be pushy about it at all.

Then complementing her and gifting her jeans from time to time sounds like a good way to scratch that itch - as long as she's a woman who wears jeans. I wear jeans all. the. time. but I have friends who don't.

[Anonymous]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=53JQz0ON--o

WOO HOO !

[Anonymous]

I'm not a fan of anyone telling me what to wear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What do you hope to get by bringing this up OP? Do you want to get her to wear jeans to satisfy your own preferences? I have always strongly reacted to men trying to control what I wear - it’s a real trigger for me. So tread carefully. I would be really, really offput if you presented it as some kind of generic expectation for what “sexy women do”; and I would also be mighty annoyed if you started pawing at me every time I put on a freakin’ pair of jeans.

Most/all women wear jeans from time to time - that should be enough for you.

thanks for the input Karen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here; no feeling of entitlement at all how my partner should look! That’s ridiculous haha.

It’s just a personal preference I guess and something I find attractive. Would never be pushy about it at all.

Then complementing her and gifting her jeans from time to time sounds like a good way to scratch that itch - as long as she's a woman who wears jeans. I wear jeans all. the. time. but I have friends who don't.

What’s with the gifting?

Giving someone jeans as a gift seems a little off.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here; no feeling of entitlement at all how my partner should look! That’s ridiculous haha.

It’s just a personal preference I guess and something I find attractive. Would never be pushy about it at all.

Then complementing her and gifting her jeans from time to time sounds like a good way to scratch that itch - as long as she's a woman who wears jeans. I wear jeans all. the. time. but I have friends who don't.

What’s with the gifting?

Giving someone jeans as a gift seems a little off.

Yeah picturing a dude buying me skinny jeans while leering.

Why are men so dumb about sex?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Early-30s guy here. For some reason, have always had a bit of thing for women in blue jeans. Who knows, just usually what I find them the most attractive in (and jean shorts).

Is it something that’s fine to bring up to someone in earlier stages of dating or could someone think it’s odd?

Try to be an open communicator generally.

The. Do you mostly try to date women with really nice butts?

[Anonymous]

"You look beautiful tonight, but, whenever I see you wearing those jeans, I want to see you not wearing them."