Is it true that 90% of women aim for the top 5% of men?

[Anonymous]

Maybe but it goes both ways. 90% of men want the top 5% of women. In the reverse the top 5% of women is based largely on looks.

[Anonymous]

The only reason women don't believe this is that the bottom 80% of men are literally invisible to them.

Women see the men in the "bottom 80%" okay. Because they marry them.

Just read the pages of DCUM where women complain that "He is okay (the primary breadwinner, good father, etc.) but I want more (him to make more money while spending more time at home, etc.)"

The best part is that you read all the "hold out for you deserve" postings knowing full well that virtually all of these women are in the bottom 80%.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

The only reason women don't believe this is that the bottom 80% of men are literally invisible to them.

Women see the men in the "bottom 80%" okay. Because they marry them.

Just read the pages of DCUM where women complain that "He is okay (the primary breadwinner, good father, etc.) but I want more (him to make more money while spending more time at home, etc.)"

The best part is that you read all the "hold out for you deserve" postings knowing full well that virtually all of these women are in the bottom 80%.

They married that guy because he was their best option at the time but they soon become resentful that they "settled" because they think they actually deserved a top 20% guy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have heard this a lot from my adult daughter and her friends. Any truth to this?

An average woman may have crushes out of her league but she rarely aims for someone out of her league. How our society is conditioned (its changing but hasn't changed), an average woman is probably better off with men who sees her as his better half so aiming equally or 10% range is likely a better long term strategy.

Actually modern men aren't aiming as high as men historically did. They are skeptic and playing safer because relationship world can be a landmine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes. Top 5% being 6ft or taller and earning at least six figures.

Earn your own six figures and stop wearing heels.

[Anonymous]

They married that guy because he was their best option at the time but they soon become resentful that they "settled" because they think they actually deserved a top 20% guy.

Bingo.

While not in the top 20% themselves, they believe that they deserve the tall, wealthy, physical because (insert reason here.)

You see these women all over DCUM. Once they realize that their market value is such that they can only bag a top 20% for NSA sex (when the guy is desperate), they start posting things like: "I only date younger men (because my dirty legs only attract this type of man)" or "I do not need a man to happy (because no one is interested in seeing me in the daylight.)"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Smart women marry well. They are strategic about it. The bad news is that while in the past it was very feasible for a dumb blonde to marry a top 5% man, these days the top 5% men marry top 5% women.

If you're top 10, focus on the top 10, and so forth. People really do pair up with similar mates. Disparities is more myth than reality, life ain't a romance novel.

Maybe she wasn't so dumb after all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think more than 10% of women have poor self esteem. They go for bad boys or men they think they can fix.

Then in few years they complaint how their BFs or DHs have changed though they haven't, you just didn't pay attention on who they really are behind their six feet, six figures and six packs.

[Anonymous]

Yes.

Both women and men want to select the best possible mate. Dating is a matching game where the sexes try to maximize their chances of attracting a "top" mate.

The modern dating environment has facilitated people encountering each other and going on dates. But women are far pickier about sex - for biological reasons - than men. What this means in a practical sense is that just about any woman can sleep with a "top" guy- those in the top percentiles of looks/wealth/etc. Having slept with what they consider a top tier mate partner, these women then refuse to seriously engage with those men they view as inferior to the men they've slept with.

This gives rise to the so-called 80-20 rule which posits that 80 percent of the women are chasing after the top 20 percent of men. A mating strategy which makes sense from an individualistic perspective fails spectacularly when considering the group as a whole. You have a generation of women who refuse to "settle" - where settling simply means dating and marrying a guy at their level, and a generation of invisible men who have very little to no chance of being successful in the dating market.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Smart women marry well. They are strategic about it. The bad news is that while in the past it was very feasible for a dumb blonde to marry a top 5% man, these days the top 5% men marry top 5% women.

If you're top 10, focus on the top 10, and so forth. People really do pair up with similar mates. Disparities is more myth than reality, life ain't a romance novel.

This^. If pauper finds a prince, its likely a spare, mentally fragile, sees psychics, has an evil step mother, lives in a cottage and doesn't have the code for treasury department's account.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe but it goes both ways. 90% of men want the top 5% of women. In the reverse the top 5% of women is based largely on looks.

+1. I think it's probably even more true in the reverse. Every guy is trying to date the most attractive 5% of women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. Top 5% being 6ft or taller and earning at least six figures.

Earn your own six figures and stop wearing heels.

Women do earn six figures now in record numbers. They’re looking for equal partners.

The problem for the lowest % of men is that women no longer have to choose between marriage and legal ownership by their father. A lot of marriages that took place before the 70s would just never happen now. Men who were raised by the generation that grew up in the 70s or before don’t always understand they need to do more than just exist.

[Anonymous]

SIGH...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, most women don't do this, unless their family members have trained them to do so. Definitely a minority, probably more as you go up the income scale.

I have never even heard of this until I moved to the more expensive DC metro.

Much like guys, women go for the best looking and unlike guys, money makes some men look better. Doesn't seem to work that way for women with money.

Not true, custom altered designer clothing, high end make up, hair highlights and extensions, eyelash lift, high heels, personal trainer, orthodontist and plastic surgeon can make anyone look pretty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe but it goes both ways. 90% of men want the top 5% of women. In the reverse the top 5% of women is based largely on looks.

Not true. More men want partners who are as educated and accomplished as themselves. Women's looks play a lesser part than they used to.