Involve kids in dog choice or surprise?

[Anonymous]

Our daughter was very decided on certain dog looks (vaguely wolfish), and when we explained that it also needed to be hypo-allergenic for her brother - which means less allergens, not none -she did some research and narrowed it down to one breed. And it worked, DS has not had symptoms in the 4 years we've had the dog.

We're not the "surprise" sort of family. Personally, I hate surprises.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Whether or not it’s a surprise I would get a hard commitment from them before you get the dog about what their involvement would be in the care of dog. We got our kids to promise they would each share equally in walks. Once you have the dog you have no leverage and they will refuse to do anything they aren’t in the mood for. Right now you have leverage.

You should only get a dog when you as adults are ready for that full commitment. Be the adult

[Anonymous]

The dog will be under the care of the adults and is a long term (potentially over 15 year) commitment. It should be an adult decision, I think. Just because a child falls in love with a dog, it might not be the best fit whether because of breed or future size or temperament. I’d rather not find myself in a position to have to say no for solid reasons to a child’s choice. I say surprise!

[Anonymous]

I have done both. When my kids were young, they did not have a choice. We told them we were getting a dog, but we chose the breed. We chose the dog. It was still a great bonding activity, and we had an amazing puppy. When my kids were teenagers, they were very involved in the process. We researched breeders and dog temperaments, etc.. We all went to the breeder and help select the puppy and name. I think it’s up to your family and your families dynamics.

[Anonymous]

We would narrow down to a few then let kids choose. It’s cruel if you need to surrender the dog if it turns out the pet don’t get along with the kids for whatever reason just because you don’t get kids involved at first.

[Anonymous]

Any dog we get will be the choice of DH and I. I need to love and enjoy any dog that comes because it will be a lot of extra work on me and I need to be fully invested. I don't like big dogs and small, fluffy dogs have been my favorites for decades.

That being said, I'd pick with the kids in mind. My kids will love any dog. We're getting a dog later this year and I've always dreamed of a puppy coming out of a box on Christmas morning. Hopefully the timing works out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We would narrow down to a few then let kids choose. It’s cruel if you need to surrender the dog if it turns out the pet don’t get along with the kids for whatever reason just because you don’t get kids involved at first.

I'd get a puppy instead because then you'd train it to fit your family instead of the opposite.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We would narrow down to a few then let kids choose. It’s cruel if you need to surrender the dog if it turns out the pet don’t get along with the kids for whatever reason just because you don’t get kids involved at first.

I'd get a puppy instead because then you'd train it to fit your family instead of the opposite.

Actually a lot of rescue dogs come trained and have known quantities eg good with kids, good with cats, needs a single dog or multiple dog home etc..

[Anonymous]

Involve them. Dog affects their lives too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Surprise. Kids are kids, not equal members of the family - they are not the ones who will be taking care of the dog, feeding it, walking it, training it, taking it to the vet, making decisions about treatment, etc

Hi Mom.

[Anonymous]

NO surprise. Let them be involved and a part of it it's a good learning experience for them so don't take that away from them.

[Anonymous]

We found the breeder and let the kids pick the actual puppy. It was amazing to surprise them that they were getting a puppy.

Our previous dog was a rescue and I would be leery about giving them the choice.. so many health, behavioral issues and you run the risk of them being divided on the dog they wanted and being upset by the final choice.

We were however, clear, that everyone in our family wanted a dog and would commit.

[Anonymous]

Depends on your kid.

My 10 yr old enjoyed the process. Picking the puppy. Meeting. Prepping for it. Learning the decision making process: need for hypoallergenic, size, cost, availability, crating and most important educating about dog safety and training before dog came home so child knew the process.

[Anonymous]

We chose the dog and told our kids we were going to get it that weekend. One kid complained the whole way and back and took weeks to warm up to the dog. Other kid likes another dog at the breeder better than that we were getting. If Id left it up to the kids, we would have no dog.

[Anonymous]

If it were me I'd surprise them.