Stroller + Escalator = Accident

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't believe you can really judge other people's parenting skills when you don't even have a child yet! Everything that I thought I'd NEVER do (like really YELL at my child, plop them in front of the TV so I could do something, etc) I have done, and I am still a really good parent. I am smiling, confident in the knowledge that you too will experience Karma.

Agreed -and the fact that OP seems to revel in her judgmental attitudes makes me wonder what kind of an example she will be to her own children.

[Anonymous]

I bet your husband can't wait for you to start judging his every move too!

Yes, strollers on escalators are not a good idea. But sometimes there are not better options. Pointing out things quietly to 'educate' your husband is your prerogative, but chastising others in public is really annoying.

btw, once my husband helped a mom with a baby and toddler carry the stroller and kids up the extremely long metro exit stairs because the elevator was broken. There are options besides public criticism.

[Anonymous]

We all judge. It's how you do it and whether you express it (and how you express it). Anyone of the Pollyannas on here who are criticizing OP are hypocrites. I guarantee you judge people on a daily basis.

In this case, who cares? It IS dangerous to take a stroller up an escalator. Everyone knows this. And, while there are instances where maybe it cannot be avoided, those instances are very few and far between. Metro and malls all have elevators. Because of the ADA and other laws, elevators or some other way to accommodate wheelchairs (and other types of things for mobility impaired people) are mostly required - this would accommodate a stroller.

[Anonymous]

I've only taken a stroller on an escalator once and that was because I couldn't find a working elevator at Metro Center and I didn't see another way to get above-ground. I carried my daughter in one arm and the (maclaren triumph) stroller in the other and stood instead of walked, for extra safety. I think if both parents are present and they lift all 4 wheels up in the air, it's marginally safer. I'm still not a big fan. (that said, I've never actually seen a stroller get stuck, and it seems a little too convenient to me that it happened to the person you confronted about it, right in front of you. I feel like you embellished this story to prove a point.)

It's great that you're concerned about safety and all, but I agree with other PP's that you really should wait till you're an actual parent to start judging other parents. It's easy to think you know everything when you're pregnant and you've read a bunch of baby books, but parenting involves daily gut checks and judgment calls. It's easy to say what's ideal, but ideal does not always equal practical, and I think parenting is more about "what actually works" and less about "what should (in theory) work." (In theory, the Metro Center elevators work. In practice, if I'd waited for a working elevator, I might still be in that metro station, waiting.) Karma also has a nasty way of biting you in the ass - I know one woman who was extremely judgmental about women who didn't breast-feed and then when she had her own baby, she wasn't able to breast feed, and she had to eat her words. (And I thought i'd be one of those women who gained only the recommended weight, and kind of internally judged other women for excess pregnancy gaining - and I gained 54 lbs. Karma's a bitch.)

[Anonymous]

PP 8:59 is exactly right, esp about karma and how you have to adapt to the situation using a gut check. Also, anyone who rides the Metro on a daily basis should be aware that usually 1/2 the elevators are out of service.

Op, there are less shrill ways of making a point

[Anonymous]

I bet had you not unnerved this woman with your judgmental comment she would have gotten the stroller on the escalator smoothly. You will soon find out how sensitive a mother can be about unsolicited comments on their parenting.

[Anonymous]

OP, do you really walk around making loud comments to your husband in praise or criticism of other people's parenting skills to "educate" him? Despite the fact that you don't yet have children so you don't really have any first-hand experience with parenting? That's obnoxious on so many level it makes my head ache.

BTW, I'm an escalator nazi thanks to twice witnessing random accidents that left people badly injured (neither involved kids however.) But I'm sure I do lots of other things that some self-righteous know-it-all childless fool would judge as imperfect or inappropriate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We're expecting #1. DH has never held a baby and I'm doing a "baby boot camp" with him wherever we go.
As we walk through the mall, grocery, park, whatever I point at all the parents with young babies and children and get to judge their parenting as much as I can showing him what I think is safe, nice, bad, ugly, not nice, rude and so on.
We've been doing a lot of reading together so he'll get a chance to learn about other POVs and make up his own mind.
One thing that really bothers me in this area is the amount of parents with strollers going up/down escalators.
Today, as we were walking towards an escalator a lady with an infant on a stroller sped up to go in front of us and I said (louder than I should - shame on me) "Babe, this is a NO NO. You NEVER EVER EVER go down/up a escalator with a stroller. NEVER! It's very dangerous!"
The lady looked back and said "No it's not!" with a mad face.
I blushed, apologized for being loud and whispered at DH's ear "You can hurt your baby, yourself and everybody behind you. Please, never do this"

I don't use my stroller on the escalator. If an elevator is out I carry my child and put the stroller on my back. But I don't commute regularly with my child and can see that there would be certain situations which would make it really difficult not to use the stroller. When I see parents in public I tend to give them the benefit of the doubt since we all have tough days and struggle through as best we can. If I overheard you in public, however, I would be judging you like a fiend for 1. telling your husband something is a "NO NO" as if he were a simple child, I am sure he loves that. 2. judging people loudly in public rather than offering your assistance. 3. referring to your husband to your husband as "babe." I think my eyes would be rolling so far out of my head I wouldn't be able to see straight. Soon you will have a child of your own and hopefully will lose some of that smug self-satisfaction. good luck with that.

[Anonymous]

I agree that it's dangerous. That said, I hope you never have to spend a lot of time riding metro with your DC. I commute by it everyday. To get to my side of the red line I have to take 3 separate elevators at metro center. It adds 15-20 minutes to my commute, particularly when tourists are heavy and are stuffing their suitcases on and I have to wait for a few runs before boarding an elevator... not to mention how frequently the elevators are just plain out. I've walked to Gallery Place and found those elevators out as well. Sometimes, we have to do what we have to do to get home in the evening.

[Anonymous]

Wow, OP, it sounds like you are a really great mom...to your husband. Do you really talk to him that way??? Tell him something is a "NO NO"?? Try to "educate him"? Especially about something you yourself have never even done? (Regardless of how much babysitting blah blah, it's not even close to the experience of being a parent.) I would never allow someone to talk to me that way. Unless your husband is a total doormat, this sounds like a recipe for serious marital issues down the road.

Or you are just a troll, b/c nobody really acts like this. Right?

[Anonymous]

We go up the escalator with the stroller all the time, but only when DH is pushing it as he is tall and can maneuver it up and down without problems. The wheels on our stroller are huge so we have never had a problem with them getting stuck in the two years we have been doing this.

[Anonymous]

LOL I'm amazed at your ability to not stick to the point! Among 25 people very few really answered OP's question. That said, did you frequent metro riders know that Metro advises you to stop at the next stop with an elevator and take a (gasp) free shuttle they offer to your stop?

[Anonymous]

OP, I'll give you a pass due to pregnancy hormones, etc. But I do recommend that you tone it down a lot. I know a number of first time parents - men AND women - who had never held a baby before becoming parents (or at least before they were expecting and figured that they needed to start to learn!). You and DH both have to learn as you go, because you have no idea what type of baby is going to come your way and how you'll need to parent him/her. You are going to cause yourself big problems if you try to micro-manage DH - frustration and anger from him because he feels like he is being treated like a baby and not trusted by you, frustration and anger by you because you get a large proportion of parenting duties because you can't trust DH to "do things right." Trust me - I've seen this.

My advice is to keep an open mind about your DH - just because he hasn't been around babies doesn't mean he won't have some great parenting qualities, and you'll probably find that he is BETTER at some parenting duties that you are. It may take him longer to get into the groove of parenting, but give him a chance and you'll likely be pleasantly be surprised at how great a father he can be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:LOL I'm amazed at your ability to not stick to the point! Among 25 people very few really answered OP's question. That said, did you frequent metro riders know that Metro advises you to stop at the next stop with an elevator and take a (gasp) free shuttle they offer to your stop?

Oh, yes, those super convenient shuttles manned by drivers who have been known to, you know, accidentally KILL pedestrians, etc..

[Anonymous]

OP, you could just have offered to help her up the escalator.
When I was 5, I got lost at the zoo and I was standing on the side and crying. One woman walked by me with her children and said loud enough for me to hear "you see what happens when bad girls don't hold their mom's hand?" Is that the kind of person you want to be?