Problems with my Private Catholic School

[Anonymous]

I’m a huge proponent of Catholic education, but unfortunately had an experience very similar to yours when we sent DC to the school I attended as a child. The 30 minute school sounds good, and I think it certainly is worth the drive if it is as good as it seems. I wonder if there is a better Catholic school that would meet your needs. That’s what we found for DC, and it was a great move.

If you do switch to private be prepared for a possibly very different philosophical environment, and to get your children’s religious education needs met outside school.

[Anonymous]

Why are you on a DMV board? Schools are detracking, not differentiating. Unless you’re in Florida…

[Anonymous]

I would move in your situation.

We moved from our parish school to a classical Catholic school with much higher expectations for the students. It is a better fit for us.

[Anonymous]

Are you in California? You sound like you are describing our former LA area Catholic school, with TK. Most Catholic schools are going to be a "one size fits all" with their approach to academics. They don't really do enrichment or supports at either end of the spectrum. The public that's 30 mins away sounds like a good bet.

[Anonymous]

RAMom wrote:This is a long post describing the problem and asking for some feedback. In a nutshell, I am wondering if folks would be willing to drive 30 minutes each way for a higher performing school with more resources and a more responsive school administration.

My kids have attended a Catholic school for the past 3 years. My youngest started in TK and the older one started in 3rd grade. I chose this school because the local public schools near our home do not have strong test scores and the Catholic school was open during Covid plus we are Catholic. They will be going into 2nd and 6th grade this Fall.

I am running into some challenges with the Catholic school. I think these challenges might be common to Catholic schools. The problems I have are:
1) No differentiated learning for advanced students or extra help for struggling students. One of my daughters scores in 99th percentile in reading and but the class is still reading simple books. She reads 3rd-5th grade books at home and can even read the New York Times! She is not challenged and the school will not do anything extra for her. My older daughter struggles and she is up and down. The school has grade inflation and gives her good grades so they do not think she has any problems.
2) There are no extracurriculars or enrichment opportunities. They do not have Spanish anymore because they lost their Spanish teacher and can’t find a new one. They were supposed to have a coding class and a chess club but both were canceled due to lack of interest.
3) The parents are very social and spend their time planning events and fundraisers. I am not sure what they use the funds for but it is definitely not to enhance academics, enrichment or extracurriculars. I am fine with the school being so social but it bugs me that the parents are not more academically focused.
4) Unresponsive Principal. I have tried to talk to her in person and I have emailed her. She rarely replies to emails. When I do get a response, she says she will look into it and does not follow up. On the topic of my daughter needing more challenge, I asked her 3 times and she never followed up. There was also a sexual incident in the classroom this year and the school never communicated to us what happened. I have just given up.

Option: High performing, resource-rich public school that is 30 minutes away (through an inter district transfer).
This will double our commute from 15 min each way to 30 min each way. The new school district offers everything that I feel is missing right now, like differentiated learning, accelerated classes, support for struggling students, staff for special services, art, choir, band, theater, STEM, languages, strong academic focus by teachers and parents, feeds into one of the top public high schools in our state, and more. The Principal at the new school was very welcoming and gave us an extensive, one hour tour of the school and let us observe all the 6th grade classes while they were in session. She has been very responsive by email. The office staff has proactively emailed and called me about registration issues. This is a public school and not a private school, believe it or not. I know the downside is being further away from where their friends would live and making it harder to do play dates and after school activities. There are some possible solutions like we could end up deciding to move but we do not want to move until we know it is a good fit. Plus we love our home and where we live.

Our other local options are:
-Local Waldorf school. I am fine with it being non-religious but worry that their non-traditional approach to reading might be a detriment. However, I have also read that Waldorf students become independent, creative thinkers and by middle school, they are performing at higher levels than some other types of schools.
-Local Public School. I like our local high school but I am unsure about our local elementary and middle schools. The reasons I am hesitant are that they have extremely local standardized test scores. I worry that perhaps they are not teaching at a high enough level since the students test low. I also worry it could be demotivating for my kids to be around other kids who are poor at reading and math.

Here are my questions:
-Would you do the drive to a higher performing school with many resources (30 min drive)?
-Would you keep them local (15 min drive)? (Note, we live in a semi-rural area so everything ”local” is at least 15 minutes away.)
-If we keep them local, would you keep them at the Catholic school or move them to either the local public school or the Waldorf school?

Yes to the 30 minute away school. If it doesn’t go well for some reason after the first year, you can try your local public, which sounds like it will lead to a good high school. No reason to keep paying for Catholic when it seems like you’re getting nothing good out of it, and there are better options.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

RAMom wrote:This is a long post describing the problem and asking for some feedback. In a nutshell, I am wondering if folks would be willing to drive 30 minutes each way for a higher performing school with more resources and a more responsive school administration.

My kids have attended a Catholic school for the past 3 years. My youngest started in TK and the older one started in 3rd grade. I chose this school because the local public schools near our home do not have strong test scores and the Catholic school was open during Covid plus we are Catholic. They will be going into 2nd and 6th grade this Fall.

I am running into some challenges with the Catholic school. I think these challenges might be common to Catholic schools. The problems I have are:
1) No differentiated learning for advanced students or extra help for struggling students. One of my daughters scores in 99th percentile in reading and but the class is still reading simple books. She reads 3rd-5th grade books at home and can even read the New York Times! She is not challenged and the school will not do anything extra for her. My older daughter struggles and she is up and down. The school has grade inflation and gives her good grades so they do not think she has any problems.
2) There are no extracurriculars or enrichment opportunities. They do not have Spanish anymore because they lost their Spanish teacher and can’t find a new one. They were supposed to have a coding class and a chess club but both were canceled due to lack of interest.
3) The parents are very social and spend their time planning events and fundraisers. I am not sure what they use the funds for but it is definitely not to enhance academics, enrichment or extracurriculars. I am fine with the school being so social but it bugs me that the parents are not more academically focused.
4) Unresponsive Principal. I have tried to talk to her in person and I have emailed her. She rarely replies to emails. When I do get a response, she says she will look into it and does not follow up. On the topic of my daughter needing more challenge, I asked her 3 times and she never followed up. There was also a sexual incident in the classroom this year and the school never communicated to us what happened. I have just given up.

Option: High performing, resource-rich public school that is 30 minutes away (through an inter district transfer).
This will double our commute from 15 min each way to 30 min each way. The new school district offers everything that I feel is missing right now, like differentiated learning, accelerated classes, support for struggling students, staff for special services, art, choir, band, theater, STEM, languages, strong academic focus by teachers and parents, feeds into one of the top public high schools in our state, and more. The Principal at the new school was very welcoming and gave us an extensive, one hour tour of the school and let us observe all the 6th grade classes while they were in session. She has been very responsive by email. The office staff has proactively emailed and called me about registration issues. This is a public school and not a private school, believe it or not. I know the downside is being further away from where their friends would live and making it harder to do play dates and after school activities. There are some possible solutions like we could end up deciding to move but we do not want to move until we know it is a good fit. Plus we love our home and where we live.

Our other local options are:
-Local Waldorf school. I am fine with it being non-religious but worry that their non-traditional approach to reading might be a detriment. However, I have also read that Waldorf students become independent, creative thinkers and by middle school, they are performing at higher levels than some other types of schools.
-Local Public School. I like our local high school but I am unsure about our local elementary and middle schools. The reasons I am hesitant are that they have extremely local standardized test scores. I worry that perhaps they are not teaching at a high enough level since the students test low. I also worry it could be demotivating for my kids to be around other kids who are poor at reading and math.

Here are my questions:
-Would you do the drive to a higher performing school with many resources (30 min drive)?
-Would you keep them local (15 min drive)? (Note, we live in a semi-rural area so everything ”local” is at least 15 minutes away.)
-If we keep them local, would you keep them at the Catholic school or move them to either the local public school or the Waldorf school?

Yes to the 30 minute away school. If it doesn’t go well for some reason after the first year, you can try your local public, which sounds like it will lead to a good high school. No reason to keep paying for Catholic when it seems like you’re getting nothing good out of it, and there are better options.[/quote

PP here. No to Waldorf. We have family at Waldorf, and it seems lovely but doesn’t match what you say you’re looking for, plus in my observations, the elementary years are where Waldorf really shines, and by high school, there are a lot of downsides as compared to good public high schools or other types of private schools ]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you in California? You sound like you are describing our former LA area Catholic school, with TK. Most Catholic schools are going to be a "one size fits all" with their approach to academics. They don't really do enrichment or supports at either end of the spectrum. The public that's 30 mins away sounds like a good bet.

This definitely sounds like CA. Most CA public schools test all kids for Gifted and Talented starting in 2nd/3rd grade, unless they're in a very rural area, so they at least acknowledge that there are some kids who are smarter than others, even if differentiation is minimal. Honestly OP should just enroll in local public and do enrichment on her own time and dime. This is what so many CA public school parents do. Our local catholic schools are nothing to brag about either. The diocese has really dropped the ball on education.

[Anonymous]

I would not go with Waldorf.

[Anonymous]

I would go with the local public. They usually have better STEM education than privates, and it doesn't sound like you are getting much by going private.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would go with the local public. They usually have better STEM education than privates, and it doesn't sound like you are getting much by going private.

I’m in California and I’d never say this.

[Anonymous]

I attended Catholic schools and am Catholic, but the reasons you outlined are why we attend public. I would personally move in bounds to the public school. My boys love their neighborhood public school. It does not have high test scores because there is a high concentration of poverty, but it does have differentiated learning, particularly accelerated learning and resources with kids with learning needs. DC had struggles in virtual schoo and was provided with after school tutoring. He is now testing 99% in math and language arts on standardized tests.

We also have after school clubs. My kids do art, engineering, science, chess and Spanish clubs. There are sports, art, STEM, dance, music. We also have onsite after care and before care.

My kids can walk to school and to most of their friends' houses or it is a short bus or bike ride. Catholic schools, kids live all over. There is often a social focus rather than academic focus. I love the sense of community from my Catholic school growing up, but people were not focused on academics, more on fun parties and friendships, which is good, but like you, I wondered what enrichments the funds were. My mom taught at a Catholic school. My dad was a lawyer.

[Anonymous]

RAMom wrote:

Here are my questions:
-Would you do the drive to a higher performing school with many resources (30 min drive)?
-Would you keep them local (15 min drive)? (Note, we live in a semi-rural area so everything ”local” is at least 15 minutes away.)
-If we keep them local, would you keep them at the Catholic school or move them to either the local public school or the Waldorf school?

Assuming you can manage the long commute to the higher performing public school, I would go there. It's free. It'll cost more money in gas and driving time. Try to find a carpool. Keep in mind things like, one kid sick and one is well... you'll still have to drive the well one. YOU are sick -- you still have to get the kids to school. That's a hassle. Look for options. But it sounds like your best choice.

You can still have neighborhood friends, scout troops in town, to have an in town social life. But your current private school just isn't working for you.

Given what you are looking for, and how you describe your children, I don't think the local public school and certainly not the Waldorf school.

[Anonymous]

Stay where you are. Every parent thinks their kid is a future Nobel winner. Hate to break it to you..

I've got 4 really smart kids. 3 in HS or college now and they graduated from an "easy" Catholic school. We sent them there to steer clear of the bureaucracy, the troublemakers, and the nutty Karens. And to avoid summer vacation starting in the middle of summer instead of the beginning of summer. School was not really a challenge for any of them. That doesn't mean it was easy, it means they were smart. So is your kid apparently. Be thankful and let them live their lives and enjoy some no-stress years. Mine that "weren't challenged" in grade school have done perfectly fine at private HSs. Got all As then, and get all As now.

[Anonymous]

Our small parochial is very accommodating to different learning levels to the extent that a class of 26 was split into 3 reading groups and 3 math groups. My daughter entered 9th grade doing Algebra II while some entered 9th doing Algebra I or Geometry. I think it depends on the school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would drive 30 minutes each way for a better school if it is possible for you to do so

+1
Better school, spend the money you going to save for extra tutoring and college savings.