Why does this make you paranoid of your social standing/appearance - because she’s implying you would know about financial struggle? It could be a power play - trying to put you down by addressing you as though you have financial stress. Or, she’s play-acting as a “normal” person? In any case, a bit odd |
Lots of people like this have an inheritance that makes then not have to save for retirement or college and then live off their salaries while never touching principal. So they sort of play at being paycheck to paycheck but really the safety angle is covered. |
I think it’s really this. She is odd. I’ve widened my social circle and can put her behavior towards me in perspective, in a good way for me. |
I had a "friend" slight me like this on and off and I let it go for a long time just chalking it up to insecurity but when the slights and vicious comments outweigh the good times, it's time to move on. |
It sounds like she isn't actually rich and is confiding in you. |
Then she's either 1) trying to get you to divulge your own financial struggles so she can feel superior or 2) in a really weird way, she's trying to relate to "regular people." I'd drop her for the catty, gossipy stuff though. Gossiping about suspicions of the paternity is really awful. |
I wish people like this would shut up. I know someone in this situation, and I hate hearing her complain about money because her husband's family is extremely wealthy so they don't have to save for college for their kids or retirement for themselves. They've made some extremely stupid financial decisions and spend a lot, then complain about stupid little costs. They'll be fine no matter what they do due to his eventual inheritance even though they're living on their salaries for now (plus some gifts here and there). |
It’s clear you don’t like her. Why do you maintain the friendship? Surely not her famous last name! |
"We're dining with the Carters tonight. You know, of the GRAYDON Carters. Perhaps you've heard of them." |
I have friends across the economic spectrum and the only people I know who talk like this are broke because they spend too much on the wrong stuff. The ones who are just barely eking it out by cutting every corner possible aren’t the ones who make these comments. I don’t know why there’s a difference, but there is. And it doesn’t seem to matter if they’re UMC strivers who stretched themselves too thin vs blue collar or hourly folks. If this woman is legit wealthy and making comments like this, it’s weird no matter the cause. Have a little self-awareness. |
I do the same at my workplace. Our house is paid off, we have no debt, we have additional side hustles bringing income, substantial retirement savings. But whenever my older coworkers start complaining about money, I nod in agreement. Little they know that I could afford to quit my job at anytime and be fine. They think they I have mortgage just like they do. |
I’m like this at work also. I don’t wear my diamonds or designers clothes bc it can only hurt you for people to think you don’t need the money. |
That’s different. You were listening and acknowledging their struggles. OP’s wealthy friend is initiating the conversation topic. That’s weird - it’s like she wants to bait OP into admitting similar struggles. If not, it’s a really tone deaf and awkward version of trying to be “down to earth”. It’s patronizing and weird. |
I'm a huge believer in Stealth Wealth. Don't let people know you have money. When you are away from your neighborhood, then spend away (but don't post about it on social media). |
Trust me, there are a lot of people who are in the same situation as you and just nodding in agreement. In fact, you are probably nodding in agreement to people who could quit their job any time as well. |