Independent Schools to Accommodate Medical Issues?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You won’t get that in private. You need an IEP or just homeschool.

I would think that would be very hard in a traditional private. How about virtual?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would lawyer up OP. They are still required to follow the ADA. My guess is that they don’t believe his illness is impacting his school work. It’s not acceptable for them to say they make no accomodations for mental illness. That’s a different kind of discrimination too — “regarded as” — if they are treating him poorly because they think he has ADHD or whatever.

At a minimum, you need a lawyer to lay the ground work to get out of the contract this year.

And yeah, do explore publics with an IEP.

An IEP wouldn't be the avenue you'd take in public school. The kid would need a 504.

[Anonymous]

I have a similar kid to OP just older. First, please fill out the forms and get a 504. ( I am assuming the OP has a child in middle school, so is looking for a very challenging high school. ) My child has a disability and is senior is a Thomas Jefferson School for Science and Technology (TJ). Most of the teachers were happy to accommodate my kid’s 504, and the principal is supportive so that helped when my kid got one who flat out refused. If your child is very bright, can they apply to TJ or another local stem magnet school? Often stem magnet schools have classes past AP level and labs that even the best privates don’t have.

I would be careful which high school you put your kid in and make sure the teachers are happy to support a 504. It only takes one or two teachers not willing to follow the 504 to cause a lot of grief, ruin grades, and make getting into colleges difficult.
Collage admissions are cut throat, and not at all like it was 30 years ago when I went. I can understand why your nervous. My kid found out the hard way that admitting you have a disability, can get you denied admission at selective collages (even though I’m sure they would never admit it.)
The good news if you know ahead of time: College admissions won’t be able to find out if your kid had accommodations unless your kid or someone who writes their recommendation tells them.: Colleges won’t know if your kid had accommodations on the SAT/ACT/AP tests. Your kid may not use all the accommodations all the time, but it’s difficult the get say SAT accommodations through College Board halfway through junior year if your kid hasn’t had a 504 with the high school for a few years. If your kid may want 504 accommodations in college, some universities make it very difficult to get them if you didn’t have them in high school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry OP. My advice is time consuming and not fail proof but I would appeal to individual teachers by meeting with them at the beginning of the year and then reminding them periodically about your child's situation.

Teachers can't make accommodations for kid without documented disabilities. It's a policy that protects the school, protects the child, and protects their peers from unfair advantages. In this case it sounds like there is a clear cut need for accommodations, but OP is refusing to use the structure that's in place because of ableism.

Asking a teacher to cheat the system because of her own hang ups isn't reasonable. It's not fair to the teachers, and it's teaching her disabled child that their disability is something to be ashamed of.

I suspect you don't have a child at a private school. You really don't know what you are talking about. Yes, teachers can give any kind of accommodations they want to give and even in public school they can do this at their own discretion.
It's not cheating the system to ask a teacher to have empathy.
There are all kinds of circumstances when a teacher might be more lenient with deadlines like when a child's home situation is not stable, or in modifying curriculum when a child is slow in learning how to read. Teachers do this kind of stuff every single day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry OP. My advice is time consuming and not fail proof but I would appeal to individual teachers by meeting with them at the beginning of the year and then reminding them periodically about your child's situation.

Teachers can't make accommodations for kid without documented disabilities. It's a policy that protects the school, protects the child, and protects their peers from unfair advantages. In this case it sounds like there is a clear cut need for accommodations, but OP is refusing to use the structure that's in place because of ableism.

Asking a teacher to cheat the system because of her own hang ups isn't reasonable. It's not fair to the teachers, and it's teaching her disabled child that their disability is something to be ashamed of.

I suspect you don't have a child at a private school. You really don't know what you are talking about. Yes, teachers can give any kind of accommodations they want to give and even in public school they can do this at their own discretion.
It's not cheating the system to ask a teacher to have empathy.
There are all kinds of circumstances when a teacher might be more lenient with deadlines like when a child's home situation is not stable, or in modifying curriculum when a child is slow in learning how to read. Teachers do this kind of stuff every single day.

I'm the PP and I teach in a private school.

If a parent came to me and said that they wanted accommodations, but they were denying their kid an accommodation plan, I would say no. Because the kid deserves to learn how to advocate for himself and work within the system, and to have his issues documented so they can be taken seriously in the future. I wouldn't help a parent avoid helping their child. It's not "having empathy" to help parents hurt their child, which is what OP is doing.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thank you everyone. In terms of "not wanting to go down that road," what I mean is that I don't want to lawyer up and force the issue. We have a letter on file from a medical specialist that explains the condition and requests certain accommodations (pretty common accommodations that other kids have in place (e.g., extra time for hand-written tests). We learned that the accommodations weren't in place, and then we went teacher by teacher. Though it takes some persistence, the school ultimately will go by the letter, but what I want is some compassion. My kid is more than capable of the academic load, and he welcomes it, on a good day. I'm trying to find a place, however, that will let me say "you know what, today was a bad day" and let him turn in homework a day late. Maybe that doesn't exist? He works so hard and he does his best to get work done in advance in case he has a bad day, but it isn't always possible. Because he doesn't look sick, the school doesn't get that when he has a bad day, there is nothing he can do but go to sleep.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry OP. My advice is time consuming and not fail proof but I would appeal to individual teachers by meeting with them at the beginning of the year and then reminding them periodically about your child's situation.

Teachers can't make accommodations for kid without documented disabilities. It's a policy that protects the school, protects the child, and protects their peers from unfair advantages. In this case it sounds like there is a clear cut need for accommodations, but OP is refusing to use the structure that's in place because of ableism.

Asking a teacher to cheat the system because of her own hang ups isn't reasonable. It's not fair to the teachers, and it's teaching her disabled child that their disability is something to be ashamed of.

I suspect you don't have a child at a private school. You really don't know what you are talking about. Yes, teachers can give any kind of accommodations they want to give and even in public school they can do this at their own discretion.
It's not cheating the system to ask a teacher to have empathy.
There are all kinds of circumstances when a teacher might be more lenient with deadlines like when a child's home situation is not stable, or in modifying curriculum when a child is slow in learning how to read. Teachers do this kind of stuff every single day.

I'm the PP and I teach in a private school.

If a parent came to me and said that they wanted accommodations, but they were denying their kid an accommodation plan, I would say no. Because the kid deserves to learn how to advocate for himself and work within the system, and to have his issues documented so they can be taken seriously in the future. I wouldn't help a parent avoid helping their child. It's not "having empathy" to help parents hurt their child, which is what OP is doing.

OP again here. I am in no way denying my child anything. My DS is in a private school. He has medical letters on file. It's a constant fight. The school doesn't understand his illness, keeps telling us it must be something else. After many, many years of testing, research, experts, we know what's wrong with our kid. It's extremely rare, and not well known, but we know what it is and how to manage it. I feel like I am constantly losing at the school. So what I am looking for is a strong school that has experience dealing with medical issues and is willing to work with us. That's all I'm asking for. I've gone by the book. It's not working. My son deserves a great education and compassion. It's really that simple.