Forgive me, but why do people who are in their mid-30s and beyond stay at companies and firms known

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Inertia. Leaving a job is scary. Doubly so if you're looking at a salary cut.

It's this. I have a number of friends in this situation. They've complained about these jobs for years (in some cases, two decades), their spouses hate their jobs, plus the company has a name that would help them get any number of very well-paying jobs with better work-life balance. But they are afraid of trying something else, discovering they don't like it or can't deal with the paycut (there's pretty much always a paycut), and then having the option of returning to their current company foreclosed.

The longer it goes on the worse it gets because they become really entrenched at their current company. They mostly just talk to colleagues who have also been there forever and it confirms what they already fear. Even when it's obvious that they should not be listening to these people. They also create lifestyles that are reliant upon that income.

They can always go back to the big 4. Have a few friends that have gone back 2 or 3 times and hopped between the big 4. No big deal.

I'm in law and am talking about people at elite law firms. It's not unheard of to go back but it's harder because of the partnership system. Basically the ways back in would be: (1) be a partner at another firm with pretty much the same work-life balance and come back with your book, (2) very high lever government position and come back via revolving door, or (3) GC at a client or potential client and then return with client. All assume you were successful in whatever it is you did -- they aren't bringing you back in after you wash up somewhere else. And if you move to a lower ranked firm with better WLB, you are unlikely to maintain the clients and clout needed to be of value.

I don't think it's tragic that it's hard to return to partnership at these firms, but it is a major reason that even people who are burned out and miserable don't always hope on the life raft out. Also a reason why mental health, alcohol and drug abuse, and divorce are so common in this group.

[Anonymous]

Not a GS alumni, but I loved my biglaw job. I only left because I had kids. If I hadn’t had a child I’d still be there billing 3k a year. It was really fun writing the briefs for cases worth $4B.

But I wanted to see my kids. If I waited until 38 to have a baby like most, I would have been 15 years in.

I still miss my biglaw job sometimes. My current job is totally mail it in for half and Flex Time. I am way smarter than my job, but I have such freedom it is worth it.

It is telling that autocorrect has capitalized Flex Time now 5 times when I tried to fix it. That seems to be not that common.

[Anonymous]

Massive amounts of money

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not a GS alumni, but I loved my biglaw job. I only left because I had kids. If I hadn’t had a child I’d still be there billing 3k a year. It was really fun writing the briefs for cases worth $4B.

But I wanted to see my kids. If I waited until 38 to have a baby like most, I would have been 15 years in.

I still miss my biglaw job sometimes. My current job is totally mail it in for half and Flex Time. I am way smarter than my job, but I have such freedom it is worth it.

It is telling that autocorrect has capitalized Flex Time now 5 times when I tried to fix it. That seems to be not that common.

This is my buddies wife. She’s a gs15, stepped out. No direct reports, works 10ish hours a week. Came from being chief counsel at a bank & was burnt when they had kids. They’re killing it and seem really happy with QOL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Golden handcuffs

This

[Anonymous]

They stay because they get angry at life and buy luxury cars and a big house that requires outsourced services.

[Anonymous]

Generally they adapt to the WLB and don’t know of anything else. Some people like to work 10+ hours a day and with wfh it makes being there at home easier. And the money is good.

[Anonymous]

More people than you would think put golden handcuffs on themselves intentionally. Start making $300k and all the sudden you want a $1mm home which is now a $6k mortgage

[Anonymous]

I agree with inertia.

I had my pry my DH away with the jaws of life from his last company. He slowly seeped into working 12-15 hour days, was depressed, overstressed, gained 20lbs.

Now he works 9-5, got a SIXTY PERCENT raise, and 2x the pto. It is worse/more expensive insurance but worth it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:More people than you would think put golden handcuffs on themselves intentionally. Start making $300k and all the sudden you want a $1mm home which is now a $6k mortgage

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More people than you would think put golden handcuffs on themselves intentionally. Start making $300k and all the sudden you want a $1mm home which is now a $6k mortgage

+1

Indeed. Just drive the Beltway and look at all the late model luxury sedans. Many of them are leased and traded in every 3-4 years. Add in private schools, a big house in a well-respected neighborhood with good schools, etc... and the cuffs go on very, very easily.

[Anonymous]

I know someone who is a senior manager in big 4 tax and will be up for director soon. She’s in her 30s and has never worked anywhere else full-time. The hours are still long for her but she says she doesn’t know where else she’d go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More people than you would think put golden handcuffs on themselves intentionally. Start making $300k and all the sudden you want a $1mm home which is now a $6k mortgage

+1

Indeed. Just drive the Beltway and look at all the late model luxury sedans. Many of them are leased and traded in every 3-4 years. Add in private schools, a big house in a well-respected neighborhood with good schools, etc... and the cuffs go on very, very easily.

+1 most people aren't willing to downsize their lives for better WLB.

We did, but at a financial cost. For us, though, it was worth it because we aren't materialistic people.

[Anonymous]

My DD worked for ten years as a trader at GS for 900K+ per year salary. She made 1.7M at GS in her last year there. After ten years at GS and saving almost all of her GS's earnings, she left and became a HS physics teacher. She is making 1/18th less as a HS teacher but she is very happy that she is making a difference in people's lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DD worked for ten years as a trader at GS for 900K+ per year salary. She made 1.7M at GS in her last year there. After ten years at GS and saving almost all of her GS's earnings, she left and became a HS physics teacher. She is making 1/18th less as a HS teacher but she is very happy that she is making a difference in people's lives.

The pay is nowhere near that high.