College overload

[Anonymous]

Given the mental health concern, I'd absolutely give them permission to lighten their load.

While this might seem like I'm parsing words, I wouldn't necessarily offer my "opinion" about what they should do, but leave the decision to them. I'd want them to know we fully support them if they choose to lighten their load and that many students start with fewer units as they adapt to college life and workloads. But ultimately I'd let them decide, given your other goal of giving them more independece.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I blame the school system, they wanted to give everyone good grades and this happened

Sure blame everyone but the student.

Maybe OP should have sent her kid who has mental challenges that she seems worried about to community college and they could have lived at home.

This is not about covid.

If you all don' think your kids are ready for a four year school why do you send them? Sure set them up for failure great awesome parenting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I blame the school system, they wanted to give everyone good grades and this happened

Sure blame everyone but the student.

Maybe OP should have sent her kid who has mental challenges that she seems worried about to community college and they could have lived at home.

This is not about covid.

If you all don' think your kids are ready for a four year school why do you send them? Sure set them up for failure great awesome parenting.

Because it’s not that simple. If they get in and want to go it makes sense to let them try and then adjust.

[Anonymous]

OP - I would advise you to find out what the last date to drop a class is and also the last date to request an incomplete, which, if granted by a professor can often have criteria on what needs to be done to complete the course. I would personally not disregard the impact of Covid on young folks at this time at all. So, you can have this information and share it with DD to let her know that there are options AND most importantly that you fully support her decision-making. It is also appropriate to explain that it is her responsibility to her classes regularly, make it a priority to keep up with the demands and "due dates' of all assignments in her classes. Do a bit of research and see if there are tutors on campus, learning labs where one might go - in other words resources to help students.

Clearly, your teen's mental health is the number one thing to stay on top of in a positive way. If one is on medication, it needs to be taken as prescribed. If one has had a therapist, then it may be important to find a way to get one online or in the local area of the college. Most colleges provide short-term counseling, but they may also have a system of local referrals. i would be to encourage the student to see if there are student support groups on campus. Freshman year is a rough and major transition so you will need to be flexible in expectations on academic performance etc. Most importantly keep an open line on communication. It is good that you have a flexible outlook on the fact that there is no one way to get through college and taking longer is not necessarily wrong. We went through a high performing student dropping out for nine months sophomore year and again at Thanksgiving in her senior year for six weeks. It was very challenging all around, but the primary focus was always on her mental health before academics.