Activities - finding the right balance

[Anonymous]

We are also high activity. DCPS with aftercare.

Weekends are: Gymnastics, piano, swim and soccer.

Even with 4 activities a weekend, that’s only 4 hours, plus maybe 2 hours of travel. My child doesn’t nap, so she still has 5+ hours of playing at home each day, 1 hour of tv and then errands/eating/birthday parties/etc.

I have an only child and we have a postage size yard. If we weren’t doing activities, she would want to sit inside and watch tv for about 3 hours every day (not that I would let her, but that is her preferred activity).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When people talk about "three nights a week" or whatever, what does that mean? After dinner?

My kids are both in afterschool/after care so at school until 5. My 4yo has never had a formal activity besides that but we just signed him up for a 45 minute soccer class on Saturdays, two blocks away. My 6yo does swim once a week as part of her afterschool. We really love having our weekends without anything structured, so the soccer thing for this winter was done with mixed feelings.

I feel this way about evening stuff too. With a school pickup, a day care pick up, two working parents, and a kid-appropriate bedtime, it feels like a lot. My 8 year old apparently feels the same way because when we were listing winter activities he could sign up for, he wanted one that was only one day a week after school.

He'd totally rather be at home playing Legos on Saturday than play soccer but he would DEFINITELY rather play soccer than be dragged hiking or to church with his parents. So we have different opinions on weekend priorities.

[Anonymous]

4yo in morning pre-k. Only child and enjoys activities. Takes year-round swim, ballet, and karate; seasonally adds in soccer and Tball, so four activities per week.

[Anonymous]

3 yo in full time pre school. She naps at school so she stays up until ridiculous hours at night. Two activities a week, would do more because she never wants to be home and is very outgoing and social.

[Anonymous]

3 year old in full time daycare/preschool, back home by 6:30pm on weekdays. On weekend, she takes a 1.5 hr foreign language class, art class and swim class.

The reason of the above busy schedule is due to her older sibling has same schedule, beforecare/aftercare plus school, back home by 6:30pm on weekdays. On weekend, he takes a 1.5 hr foreign language, art class and swim class.

They take most of the weekend together or in the same building or different time. It works well, and be fair to both kids. She tags along to sign up together.

[Anonymous]

My 3 year old does nothing. 6 year old does language class on weekends. We get home at 5/5:30 from aftercare/daycare and they play, we have family dinner etc. Oldest dos soccer on a weekday for a while and that was ok. We will do music lessons at home for both soon. I really dislike the rush around in the evening to activities and like my weekends for grandparent time, hikes, playgrounds, playdates and rest. Seems like we are bigger homebodies than many here. Little one still naps and if we do a lot of am running around the older one will too (and so will mom and dad).

[Anonymous]

At that age, ours took swimming lessons and that's it. Kids that age don't need organized activities. If you SAH and need something to structure the day or get out of the house or whatever, fine, but that's really for you. Your kid doesn't care. We worked, so we prioritized family time and family outings or activities.

[Anonymous]

We don’t do organized activities with our young kids. Swim lessons at the most, but that’s a necessity. We want a relaxing home life and our oldest is 5, which is too young to be calling the shots on how to spend time

[Anonymous]

Another low-activity family here. We did swimming at that age and that was it.

[Anonymous]

I have an almost-3yo and 1yo. I would like to put the 3yo in swimming (for safety) or gymnastics (for fun) on the weekends but until she's 3, there aren't dropoff classes so we're holding off now. We don't feel the lack of activities. Playground time and chores and just hanging out keeps us plenty busy on the weekends and kids are in daycare during the week.

If I was a SAHM, we would probably do library story time and 1-2 activities per week and/or a play group during the day on weekdays.

[Anonymous]

For us, we’ve held off on activities until kindergarten, aside from swim lessons. Preschool is enough. We go to storytime at the library and family nature programs, but those are occasional, free, and for the whole family.

[Anonymous]

We don't do anything except swim lessons during summer and sometimes fall. We're probably on the lower end of the spectrum in this area but we really savor that family time and flexibility on the weekends and both work full time, so all day with peers feels sufficient. But I totally understand, I've questioned it sometimes because when you see others doing it you're going to question but most of what I've read is that unstructured time is really good for kids. And I just remind myself there is a lot of time. I realize it's just an hour here and there, but it's the getting ready, schlepping there, not having our schedule free that is unappealing. I know that will come as the kids get older so for now, I'd rather be able to just go on a hike in the morning as a family etc. I would PREFER my kids not end up in travel soccer (because again, family time) so I'm not really worried about missing the boat in that way. My oldest is getting close to 5 and we may try soccer in the spring for the first time because he explicitly expressed interest in it. So we'll start trying things here and there but I'm still hoping to go really slow til 7.

Just because it's available doesn't mean it's best for your family (might be best for another family!)

[Anonymous]

My 3 yr old does ballet, gymnastics, and swim on the weekend plus soccer depending on the season. It’s a lot, I know, but she loves each activity and I like having structure to the day. We feel like we still have plenty of downtime and we don’t have a problem with having to miss a class for a party or something. She’s also an only, so that may factor into our schedule.

[Anonymous]

Our 3 year old did an 8 week swimming class last winter (Saturday mornings with a parent) and will do the same this winter. He doesn’t do anything else formal. He and his little sister are home with a nanny and go to the playground or library story time everyday, but that’s very unstructured and I don’t think counts.

We may sign him up for 8 weeks of kiddie soccer or something this summer just so he has a little exposure to group care, since he starts PK-3 in the fall and I assume most kids are coming from day care. But it would be a one time thing.

We don’t plan on doing anything else formal besides swimming (which is a safety issue/life skill) for years. Why rush, let them be kids! Free play is better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At that age, ours took swimming lessons and that's it. Kids that age don't need organized activities. If you SAH and need something to structure the day or get out of the house or whatever, fine, but that's really for you. Your kid doesn't care. We worked, so we prioritized family time and family outings or activities.

NP here. This makes me feel much better! I don’t know how people have so much time/energy to do these structured activities/classes when you work full time and Kids are in daycare all day. I’m exhausted at the end of the day and just getting the kids dinner and preparing for the next day then bed time is enough. Our weekends are fun though with at least one activity and then family time.