AITA? Teen at Bar

[Anonymous]

Why would you sit at a bar with a kid that age? Were the tables full? Were you trying to avoid conversation? Wanted her to learn about bartending?

If the restaurant was full, and you were in a hurry, I can see it. But it sounds like you took your time?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe it was the bottle of wine (I would be concerned if I saw one adult, one teen, and a bottle of wine and hoped that the bartenders had it under control and wouldn't let you get wasted and drive).

This was probably the reason

Yeah, it might not make me blink an eye in a city where everyone walks, but if it's in a place where most people drive, it might concern me to see the only adult with a minor drinking a bottle of wine since no one knows how much of that bottle you're drinking.

Also to me it's a worrying sign that someone doesn't skip alcohol when the other person you're with can't drink. I'm not a teatotaller but I don't drink when I'm one-on-one with a child because it seems rude, among other things. After growing up with a parent with an alcohol problem, I empathize that it can feel uncomfortable for a kid to be with a parent drinking.

You pay way too much attention to what other people do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe it was the bottle of wine (I would be concerned if I saw one adult, one teen, and a bottle of wine and hoped that the bartenders had it under control and wouldn't let you get wasted and drive).

This was probably the reason

Yeah, it might not make me blink an eye in a city where everyone walks, but if it's in a place where most people drive, it might concern me to see the only adult with a minor drinking a bottle of wine since no one knows how much of that bottle you're drinking.

Also to me it's a worrying sign that someone doesn't skip alcohol when the other person you're with can't drink. I'm not a teatotaller but I don't drink when I'm one-on-one with a child because it seems rude, among other things. After growing up with a parent with an alcohol problem, I empathize that it can feel uncomfortable for a kid to be with a parent drinking.

Do you also skip eating meat when with a vegetarian? All dairy when you’re with a vegan?

[Anonymous]

Did you need to reinforce the negative stereotypes of the name Karen? Was that necessary? Could you have just said “a nosy patron”?

No, it was none of her business and there was nothing wrong with your teenaged child sitting at the bar eating. You just didn’t need to make it into a gendered comment on here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe it was the bottle of wine (I would be concerned if I saw one adult, one teen, and a bottle of wine and hoped that the bartenders had it under control and wouldn't let you get wasted and drive).

This was probably the reason

Yeah, it might not make me blink an eye in a city where everyone walks, but if it's in a place where most people drive, it might concern me to see the only adult with a minor drinking a bottle of wine since no one knows how much of that bottle you're drinking.

Also to me it's a worrying sign that someone doesn't skip alcohol when the other person you're with can't drink. I'm not a teatotaller but I don't drink when I'm one-on-one with a child because it seems rude, among other things. After growing up with a parent with an alcohol problem, I empathize that it can feel uncomfortable for a kid to be with a parent drinking.

Do you also skip eating meat when with a vegetarian? All dairy when you’re with a vegan?

Sometimes. I certainly wouldn't order a rare steak when it to eat with a vegan friend who chose that diet for ethical reasons, the same way I'd skip the wine if I was out to dinner just me and a pregnant friend. I have a friend with celiac and recently also is dealing with lactose intolerance who misses pizza terribly, so I worked never order that when we go out together.

In a big group at a table all bets are off, but if there's just me and one other person, I try not to order anything that they couldn't or wouldn't have.

[Anonymous]

OP, why do you point out the 'expensive appetizers', bill total and tip?

It's either ok for a 15 year old to sit at a bar with a parent or it's not ok, but that doesn't depend on $ spent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe it was the bottle of wine (I would be concerned if I saw one adult, one teen, and a bottle of wine and hoped that the bartenders had it under control and wouldn't let you get wasted and drive).

This was probably the reason

Yeah, it might not make me blink an eye in a city where everyone walks, but if it's in a place where most people drive, it might concern me to see the only adult with a minor drinking a bottle of wine since no one knows how much of that bottle you're drinking.

Also to me it's a worrying sign that someone doesn't skip alcohol when the other person you're with can't drink. I'm not a teatotaller but I don't drink when I'm one-on-one with a child because it seems rude, among other things. After growing up with a parent with an alcohol problem, I empathize that it can feel uncomfortable for a kid to be with a parent drinking.

Do you also skip eating meat when with a vegetarian? All dairy when you’re with a vegan?

Sometimes. I certainly wouldn't order a rare steak when it to eat with a vegan friend who chose that diet for ethical reasons, the same way I'd skip the wine if I was out to dinner just me and a pregnant friend. I have a friend with celiac and recently also is dealing with lactose intolerance who misses pizza terribly, so I worked never order that when we go out together.

In a big group at a table all bets are off, but if there's just me and one other person, I try not to order anything that they couldn't or wouldn't have.

That’s fine, but none of it is necessary. None of my friends who are vegetarian or halal bat an eye if I order a pork dish. They know they are in the minority, and don’t seek to impose their restrictions on me. They would feel uncomfortable if I forwent food that I wanted to assimilate to their eating habits. And all my friends drank when I was pregnant and vice versa!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why would you sit at a bar with a kid that age? Were the tables full? Were you trying to avoid conversation? Wanted her to learn about bartending?

If the restaurant was full, and you were in a hurry, I can see it. But it sounds like you took your time?

What does it matter? Alcohol is served to everyone 21+ regardless of where they are sitting. The bar serves a full menu of food.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe it was the bottle of wine (I would be concerned if I saw one adult, one teen, and a bottle of wine and hoped that the bartenders had it under control and wouldn't let you get wasted and drive).

This was probably the reason

Yeah, it might not make me blink an eye in a city where everyone walks, but if it's in a place where most people drive, it might concern me to see the only adult with a minor drinking a bottle of wine since no one knows how much of that bottle you're drinking.

Also to me it's a worrying sign that someone doesn't skip alcohol when the other person you're with can't drink. I'm not a teatotaller but I don't drink when I'm one-on-one with a child because it seems rude, among other things. After growing up with a parent with an alcohol problem, I empathize that it can feel uncomfortable for a kid to be with a parent drinking.

When we go out, the adults get to have wine or beer and the kids get to have soda. It’s a treat for everyone.