struggling with decision. Any kind advise is appreciated

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Went to William and Mary (after transferring from UVA) and I will say William and Mary attracts a very specific kind of kid. If you are that type, it’s an amazing place because you feel very at-home. If not, you may find the College kind of hard to fit in.

Most W&M kids are academically-strong yes, but also the type who like being leaders and enjoy volunteering. Class President, leader of a club, frequent volunteer, etc. There is a drinking and frat culture just like anywhere. But weekends aren’t spent tailgating and going to the big game. Instead, it’s things like dropping by the club fundraiser, playing frisbee in the sunken gardens or going to a fraternity social event.

The kids who really struggled were the ones who transferred from big sports schools, hippie/artsy types and people from places like NYC who were bored by Williamsburg. The kids who were really happy were the ones who found an outlet for their many, many interests and enjoyed the security of being around other smart/good kids, while getting to do adult independence. It’s also a place full of normal kids, but also where it’s okay to be a little nerdy or unusual.

My point being: William and Mary tends to be one of those places where kids quickly feel at home - or don’t at all. I’d do everything possible to visit, do an overnight with a current student, etc. With enough exposure, he should get a good feel for the place and string yes/no.

[Anonymous]

Also, keep in mind OP that, at this point, any concerns you or your kid many have are x10 magnified. At the end of the day, I am sure you kid will be fine at either school. Kids learn to like their school because they make new friends.

[Anonymous]

Has he toured umd? Talked to a Scholars student? He may feel like he knows it, but the tour and events will bring out different facets. Mine got much more excited about umd after touring. It's a lovely campus with excellent academics and tons of diverse people and interests. One of our tour guides was in scholars and loved her experience there.

Is there a big cost difference?

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

DD is making a similar decision, W&M vs. large state school. Seriously leaning towards W&M after attending admitted students day and talking to students and faculty.
She really liked that professors are very accessible to students.
Not sure if it is true, but I was told that this year all freshman's dorms are going to have ACs. I also feel there is a ton of school spirit there.

[Anonymous]

My DD having a hard time choosing between two schools (different ones) but here are some of the things we did to help with that decision. Some have already been mentioned.

1. We looked really closely at the program at both - for her major requirements and for the gen ed requirements - to make sure there weren’t any surprises or potential complications.

2. We went to visit both for admitted student days/open houses so she could revisit facilities, interact with faculty from her major, and get a sense of the atmosphere.

3. We also looked closely at campus life aspects for both - she’s interested in study abroad and intramural/club sports so made sure schools offered what she’s looking for.

4. We mapped out cost - actual cost of attendance to make sure there weren’t any surprises.

5. This one may sound silly but my DD started looking at the Instagram account for admitted students. These are usually informal/not run by the university but kids send in a photo and some info about where they are from, what they plan to study etc. Honestly this may end up being the tie breaker for her. Both schools were very even but she feels strongly that the kids for one school look more interesting and diverse than the others.

I told her many times that there is no wrong choice, both are great schools and she (and your son) will find their place at either. Best of luck! He has two great options and should feel very proud.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Son is struggling between University of Maryland and William & Mary.

Major = economics
Straight A student in high school
accepted in Scholars at Umd and James Madison scholars at W&M

Worried that there is little school spirit at W&M and there will be little to do other than studying with the high academic rigor often spoke about at W&M.

First impression of UMD was that it was "so big....I'm going to get lost"....but has school spirit. He knows that he will find his way if he went there.

University of Md is our state school but was given some aid to attend W&M.

He needs to make the decision but is struggling. First of many struggles in life, I know. I would love to hear from any parents or students in the same situation. He will make the best of either situation, I"m sure. As his parent, I see him feeling "stuck". Not sure what else we can offer to help him make the decision.

Your kid won't get lost at UMD. While its campus is physically large, it won't matter. He will have classes with same kids over the 4 years.

Not to hijack the thread but can you explain this? Is it just because OP’s kid is in honors? What about kids who aren’t? I went to a school half as big as Maryland and only had the same classmates in a couple of my major classes.

DP, but I went to a different state flagship. While there are tens of thousands of students, there are only so many in the "school" and eventually the "department" that your id will be taking classes with. So, if your kid is doing social sciences,they won't have much intereaction with the nursing school, the engineering school etc. So instead of a 25,000 student school, think of it more like a 6,000 student school.

[Anonymous]

Re: looking at Instagram accounts, W&M has a "Life at WM" account which each week a different student takes over and posts about their life at WM.

https://www.instagram.com/lifeatwm/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Went to William and Mary (after transferring from UVA) and I will say William and Mary attracts a very specific kind of kid. If you are that type, it’s an amazing place because you feel very at-home. If not, you may find the College kind of hard to fit in.

Most W&M kids are academically-strong yes, but also the type who like being leaders and enjoy volunteering. Class President, leader of a club, frequent volunteer, etc. There is a drinking and frat culture just like anywhere. But weekends aren’t spent tailgating and going to the big game. Instead, it’s things like dropping by the club fundraiser, playing frisbee in the sunken gardens or going to a fraternity social event.

The kids who really struggled were the ones who transferred from big sports schools, hippie/artsy types and people from places like NYC who were bored by Williamsburg. The kids who were really happy were the ones who found an outlet for their many, many interests and enjoyed the security of being around other smart/good kids, while getting to do adult independence. It’s also a place full of normal kids, but also where it’s okay to be a little nerdy or unusual.

My point being: William and Mary tends to be one of those places where kids quickly feel at home - or don’t at all. I’d do everything possible to visit, do an overnight with a current student, etc. With enough exposure, he should get a good feel for the place and string yes/no.

I think your account sounds pretty accurate--like you say the dominant type at W&M actually strikes me as a very smart and purposeful leader type rather than nerdy (though there are niches for everyone).My own kid there is a fairly straightforward 'leader-type' who grew up in big cities and has an artsy bent and has really grown to love W&M--but I would agree he's happy to come back to city-life during breaks. But he was never big into watching sports--likes to play them and is athletic, but went to an urban high school that wasn't very sports-centric and wasn't looking for that from school.

So the school has a lot of fun and spirit but it doesn't fit the mold of either a big sports school or a school with a big artsy/alternative vibe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DC is in the same situation OP. Different schools, but the same dynamic. Very difficult decision when it all comes down to fit and the fit isn't ideal at either. No advice, but good luck. I'm sure it will work out.

We are having the same issue here. Programs fit my DC’s interests. That is the easy part to figure out. School culture is harder.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Not sure if it is true, but I was told that this year all freshman's dorms are going to have ACs. I also feel there is a ton of school spirit there.

Curious who told you that? Unfortunately I don't think it's accurate, though I know the College is working hard to update facilities. That said, my DC will be going to W&M and has a medical condition that makes AC pretty essential. I've been in touch with them about applying for an AC dorm room as an accommodation and I would think they would have told me if it was an unnecessary request. FWIW, the dorms all have AC in common areas, but not all have it in the rooms. My understanding is that upperclass dorm rooms all have AC, so really only a concern freshman year.

Don't want to discourage your DD as I think W&M is a great school otherwise!! Good luck with her decision.

[Anonymous]

2 years ago my DS was deciding between UMD and W&M. He ultimately decided to go to W&M and it has been a great choice for him. Speaking with his friends at UMD - yes, there is more of a big sports tailgate opportunity there than W&M, but what he has traded that for at W&M is smaller classes, taught by professors, who are very accessible and know their students. (Compared to his friends’ experiences)

Both schools are great and will serve him well. Pick the one where he feels most comfortable.

[Anonymous]

My very math-driven younger cousin went to William & Mary.
Had a great experience over all.

His sibling went to another state school that was the size and vibe of U-MD. He and his friends would visit often b/c W&M was more like a small liberal arts college, and he was interested in things like fraternity parties and the college experience you see in the movies.

No regrets, but remind your child that part of the college experience is taking road trips to other colleges.

How do they spend their social time now?

Good luck. Two great choices!!!

[Anonymous]

Drop him off for two hours at each school during the busy part of the day. Have him pretend he a student. Walk into buildings, classrooms, cafeteria (have lunch by himself). He can get a feel for what it’s like while there. And you should wait in the car!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Not sure if it is true, but I was told that this year all freshman's dorms are going to have ACs. I also feel there is a ton of school spirit there.

Curious who told you that? Unfortunately I don't think it's accurate, though I know the College is working hard to update facilities. That said, my DC will be going to W&M and has a medical condition that makes AC pretty essential. I've been in touch with them about applying for an AC dorm room as an accommodation and I would think they would have told me if it was an unnecessary request. FWIW, the dorms all have AC in common areas, but not all have it in the rooms. My understanding is that upperclass dorm rooms all have AC, so really only a concern freshman year.

Don't want to discourage your DD as I think W&M is a great school otherwise!! Good luck with her decision.

A tour guide. I knew it is too good to be true! Hope you child gets an AC.

DD doesn't care about this as much as I do The same about the food. Chicken is still pink inside - "oh, well, I will eat less and get skinnier".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Went to William and Mary (after transferring from UVA) and I will say William and Mary attracts a very specific kind of kid. If you are that type, it’s an amazing place because you feel very at-home. If not, you may find the College kind of hard to fit in.

Most W&M kids are academically-strong yes, but also the type who like being leaders and enjoy volunteering. Class President, leader of a club, frequent volunteer, etc. There is a drinking and frat culture just like anywhere. But weekends aren’t spent tailgating and going to the big game. Instead, it’s things like dropping by the club fundraiser, playing frisbee in the sunken gardens or going to a fraternity social event.

The kids who really struggled were the ones who transferred from big sports schools, hippie/artsy types and people from places like NYC who were bored by Williamsburg. The kids who were really happy were the ones who found an outlet for their many, many interests and enjoyed the security of being around other smart/good kids, while getting to do adult independence. It’s also a place full of normal kids, but also where it’s okay to be a little nerdy or unusual.

My point being: William and Mary tends to be one of those places where kids quickly feel at home - or don’t at all. I’d do everything possible to visit, do an overnight with a current student, etc. With enough exposure, he should get a good feel for the place and string yes/no.

I think your account sounds pretty accurate--like you say the dominant type at W&M actually strikes me as a very smart and purposeful leader type rather than nerdy (though there are niches for everyone).My own kid there is a fairly straightforward 'leader-type' who grew up in big cities and has an artsy bent and has really grown to love W&M--but I would agree he's happy to come back to city-life during breaks. But he was never big into watching sports--likes to play them and is athletic, but went to an urban high school that wasn't very sports-centric and wasn't looking for that from school.

So the school has a lot of fun and spirit but it doesn't fit the mold of either a big sports school or a school with a big artsy/alternative vibe.

Yes exactly. I’ve never understood the nerdy label. It’s much more of a “being a leader is fun” vibe. Want to start a club? Organize a fundraising event? Spend a semester abroad? Go for it. It’s a campus of “enthusiasts” and everyone has something they are into.