| Because when the parents and/or both sets of grandparents are multi-millionaires, the (grand)kids can go literally anywhere they want. And when you're rich, it's a status thing to send your kids to private or an out-of-state public because it signals you're rich and couldn't care less about the extra $100k or whatever you just blew. And it makes bitter broke middle class people like OP jealous. And of course you'd like your kid to broaden their horizons, social circle and dating (marital) pool versus just hanging out with the same handful of peers from the same exact region they grew up in. And I think rich kids are generally "over" the area they grew up in, they're well traveled and when money is no object, they are more likely to seek out new exciting adventures. I think if you told the average middle class kid they could go anywhere, 90% of them would still choose the in-state school, they're just happy to get out of their parents' house. A rich kid is exponentially more likely to capitalize and head off to Colorado, California, New England, Texas, whatever. |
| In VA, we've got state schools that are "away" from home (DC area). But UMD is right here at home (DC area). I think your son just wants to not be right here at home! |
So much about this post rubs me wrong. |
| We live in DC and have no viable state flagship, so with DC-TAG, places like Michigan and Cal are the same general cost as UMD with a far better academic and cultural experience. |
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The program. For example, Berkeley and Ann Arbor have amazing humanities undergrad programs. I'm in Richmond and VCU attracts a ton of students from all states and countries for the art program. A lot of people have money. My FIL is a boomer who did very well with investments and real estate. He sold one of his properties, made 300K profit and paid our kids' undergrad tuition with it. Boomers are swimming in money.
"Older Americans Stockpiled a Record $35 Trillion. " https://www.wsj.com/articles/older-americans-35-trillion-wealth-giving-away-heirs-philanthropy-11625234216 "Boomers, however, are 10 times wealthier. They hold 53.2%, or $59.96 trillion, of US wealth. That's also twice the $28.5 trillion of US wealth that Gen X holds." https://www.businessinsider.com/millennials-versus-boomers-wealth-gap-2020-10 "The typical boomer has a median net worth of $206,700." "Meanwhile, households of younger Americans saw their average net worth decline from $103,400 to $100,800 over those 20 years." https://www.businessinsider.com/typical-baby-boomer-net-worth-debt-real-estate-retirement-2021-12#the-typical-boomer-has-a-median-net-worth-of-206700-6 |
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1) to get out of the state
2) many OOS flagships give good merit aid. WVU for example was cheaper than UMCP |
Hahaha! My kids all hated UVA. We thought it was pretentious and full of itself. They ended up at private universities but I loved my time at Maryland. It has some amazing majors and opportunities. It's big but I was in a limited enrollment major and, honestly, it was a good school for me. I wish I would have pushed my youngest to attend instead of the private university where he attended. |
This is the challenge for MD residents. Similarly, NoVA kids often don't want to consider George Mason because it's close to home. I grew up in LA and refused to apply to UCLA. But VA and CA both have lots of excellent in-state/away from home options. If UMD is the best and most affordable option and it's just the "away" piece that is a problem, I agree with PP to look into options to get some of that away experience in other ways. Could be a year of study abroad, summer programs, encourage them to apply for summer internships in other cities. Do they have housing options where you might be put with more OOS/international students so you can meet a wider range of people? Agree that you will not visit them or ask them to come home for family events. |
| Most of the OOS public attendance is driven by the inability to get into a coveted private or highly ranked in-state public. Major also plays an important role. There are a ton of DMV kids who want CS or engineering and the top schools don’t have sufficient room for all of them. So, students spread their bets more widely, which oftentimes means big OOS publics that welcome OOS tuition dollars and have large tech programs (which may have less interest from in-state students). Finally, if the parents have the money, they just do what they have to do. |
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OP here.
I wrote that off the cuff, and am surprised it offended people. I was in the midst of sticker shock at the cost of some of the state schools. People who know me would be entertained seeing this directed at me: "I love these posts where the OP is so confident and wants to make sure by making other people prover her wrong." I'm NEVER sure of my choices or that I'm right. Actually I'd love to be persuaded against pressuring my kid to attend in-state. I get it, Maryland is boring if you grew up here. I was very eager to get away to the east coast for college when I was in high school. But I just can't see how it makes sense if it's double to quadruple the cost for a similar educational option. And it's not because I am (as another PP suggested) broke and bitter. It's because I'm frugal and practical. I meant to qualify the question by saying this is assuming the kid gets in to their state flagship. Personally, I think every state should prioritize in-state kids more. It sucks that so many kids were getting rejected from UMD despite good stats. Definitely makes me want to make sure my second DS applies to more of the in-state schools. |
NP. Dear Lord, I didn't sense that all. Asked a question, posted an opinion. |
| People, especially older Americans, are rich and don't think twice on spending money on grandkids' college. There is no more noble or feel-good thing to spend your money on, especially when you have more money than you can spend before dying. Everyone knows college is the time of your life and the education and connections set you up for life. It's indulgent and a privilege, of course, but it brings great joy to the grandkids. |
this is helpful. We also have not yet visited UMD (because of Covid). Perhaps a visit will spark enthusiasm. |
In some states, there aren't enough in-state kids who want to attend, and in others, the state legislators have cut state funding so much, there is little incentive not to grab the heftier OOS tuition money. |
I didn't get offended by your post. But I think there are many good reasons to consider OOS publics. A lot of them are excellent schools; it's nice to go to college in a different geographic area; a lot of the state schools have fun, social vibes; you can sometimes get them to give your kid an in-state tuition as merit aid. |