Is this common now? Preschooler projects done by the parents?
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Anonymous
| My kid is not artistic and hates that stuff. In middle school now. Yup, I do most of it. I hate those projects. |
Anonymous
| I don't help my k and pk kids with theirs beyond making sure they do it and supervising. They're not graded so I don't really care how it turns out. I just want them to engage and put in the effort and practice the physical skills involved. |
Anonymous
No, OP, you were right the first time. I don't take a hard line on almost anything parenting related but the only people doing their kids an actual (if minor) disservice are parents who help preschoolers and schools that expect them to help. Scaffolding is great, helping your 4th grader learn PowerPoint is useful. Doing any percentage of a *preschool art project* for your kid is not that. Think of it this way... If the expectations are developmentally inappropriate, then parents helping kids to meet inappropriate expectations does what for the children? It doesn't teach them anything, because they're not developmentally able to internalize "how to do X." It might tell them that their product (art! For preschool!) is more important than their process. And sure, that's the crappy way of the world, too often, but it doesn't help to beat it into them when they're four. What it is NOT is "enrichment" or "acceleration." Tell me how doing things (that basically none of them are able to do at that age) FOR a child accelerates the pace at which they are learning? People learn best by doing, not as well by direct instruction, and very little by someone else doing the thing for them. I'd like to believe that the school didn't actually expect the level of work you saw, but maybe these insecure or striving parents just took this on themselves. But this isn't for a grade. It isn't or shouldn't be to impress other adults. So what were they doing this (imo counterproductive) work for? You did AWESOME. Your kid learned new skills and I'm sure took pride in her work. Luckily at this age they don't necessarily notice that the other projects look more polished. Keep doing what you're doing, OP. Parents who do too much of this... it's not that they're helicopters per se, but yes, they're doing their kids a disservice. I've seen way too many toddlers get injured on playground equipment that their parents put them on, or "helped" them use. One day their parent is less involved or distracted, and these kids-- who never learned what it felt like for their actual bodies to do the monkey bars or whatever-- get on the equipment believing they can do things they never actually learned to do under their own power. Other kids internalize the message that they can't do things on their own, or at least not with confidence. Don't let that be your kid, literally or metaphorically. And let me be clear, again-- of course you can help your kids in life. I'm not a hardass! But to do things for them that are expected of them but inappropriate to expect? That's not helping anyone. Especially when the child is not even asking for this help. |
Anonymous
Do they like to brush their teeth? |
Anonymous
| Still doing projects in 8 th grade here |
Anonymous
My kid will get a big fat F in red with a circle around it before I do a project for them in 8th grade. |
Anonymous
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It's not like they get grades in preschool. And even if they do, I'd hope it's not based on the quality of take-home projects. I think the best thing is to let them do as much of it as possible, depending on their skill level, so they can practice and learn.
The only "homework" our preschool ever gave was an "About me" page at the beginning of the year for each kid. In the PreK3 class we asked our kid each question and wrote down their answer for them so that was like 90% done by us. In the PreK4 class, our kid was already able to write letters (and liked doing so), so we read the directions and spelled out any words they wanted to use so that's more like 50% us. But based on our later visit to the classroom, there were plenty of parents still doing 80% or more of the work and that was fine too, teacher did not care either way at all. |
Anonymous
| I’m still pretty proud of the nature diorama I did for my 5th grader 10 years ago. My otters were super realistic. Just get through it OP. Whatever is easier. |
Anonymous
I was pretty proud of my last science project I did earlier this year. Kid had to tell me what I was making and help me label it but given my lack of artistic ability it was pretty nice. I was pissed they only got a 14/15. |
Anonymous
| My parents wouldn't help me with school projects and I always resented tat my projects looked like an elementary aged kid did them vs. my classmates |
Anonymous
| my kids are. in publlc c schools and older, but they did their own projects and always have. We laugh at the kids whose parents did their HW for them. One mom didn't believe in HW so she would do the math homework for her daughter. Another friend did the 5th grade science fair project for her daughter. They won, while my daughter did her own project and lots of research and got honorable mention. Well, it is truly honorable to do your own work. These days hard work and merit hardly matters, beginning in preschool. |
Anonymous
LOL I wonder if it skips generations. The kid who didn't get help resents their kid project competing against adults. The kid who got help thinks it is ridiculous and doesn't help their kid. |
Anonymous
DP. There’s a middle ground. |
Anonymous
| I think the problem here is a preschooler with a "homework project". |
Anonymous
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Gotta love all the people chiming in with their stories of upper elementary kids and middle schoolers.
We’re discussing preschool projects. And yes, I did need to assist my 3-year-old in ordering photo prints from Walgreens for his family tree project. Quelle horreur. |