Surprised at ultrasound

[Anonymous]

Found out I am having a boy-feel pretty selfish because I wanted a girl and all the more so because I know things are healthy. I can't help but feeling sad as I think this maybe my last shot. Did this happen with anyone else and any advice?

[Anonymous]

I was surprised when I found out it was a boy b/c everyone kept telling me they thought I would have a girl.... but, after two miscarriages in a row, I didn't care WHAT it was as long as it was one or the other....

[Anonymous]

I wanted a girl, and the ultrasound revealed a little penis. I was disappointed, and then COMPLETELY FORGOT I EVER HAD A PREFERENCE! I didn't even remember I'd cared once until he was about a year old and a friend brought it up.

My advice - don't waste energy beating yourself up for being a bit sad. Be a bit sad. Then start thinking about the wonderful little boy. As you adjust your expectations, the sad part will go away.

[Anonymous]

I had a similar experience. I thought for sure this one was a girl...and when we went in and saw his penis, I was a bit sad/disappointed. Like the PP, I've had miscarriages and I'm thrilled its healthy and stuck around.

I have another DS, and BOYS are great...very fun and easy. Mine's a momma's boy, and it's too sweet (he's 2.5).

I'm happy that I'm having another boy now, so that my sons can be best friends!

Enjoy your pregnancy, and you'll have a great time once he's born!!

[Anonymous]

I didn't find out the sex during ultrasound, but I was convinced I was having a certain gendered baby (positive, in fact). I know - very silly. I was semi-shocked when we got the other "flavor"! I seriously had a few moments of feeling disappointed and I felt very guilty, but after holding the baby, I quickly forgot about it and now my husband and I laugh about it!

You will love your baby so much and he will be such a joy to you! (But you are not alone and people who try to say that they never had similar feelings are probably lying!)

[Anonymous]

Our ultrasound tech told us BY MISTAKE we were having a boy. We really didn't want to find out the gender (hadn't for our other kids). Once I knew, I also felt a little sad it was a boy - partly because of external comments "Oh, you must be disappointed your daughter is getting another brother", etc. I didn't dwell on it too much and was so thankful all looked healthy on the u/s, but I really wish I hadn't known ahead of time. And - like the PPs have said - once he was born, I couldn't have imagined it any other way - he's perfect! Congrats on your little guy!

[Anonymous]

Our u/s technician told us by mistake as well! We didn't care either way if it was a boy or girl, but I was just upset to lose the delivery room announcement.

[Anonymous]

I had a very similar reaction and also felt very selfish. It all becomes relative. Of course, we all want healthy children and once you get through all the scary testing you begin to favor one sex over the other. I actually cried when I found out, but then it resonated and I was thrilled about having a little boy!!! Just give yourself some time.

[Anonymous]

Pick a name and start bonding -- I promise you'll start to get excited about the boy you're about to welcome. We went into our ultrasounds armed with names for a boy and a girl both times (we have two boys). It really helped to walk out of the room talking about our baby by name and immediately starting to brainstorm on plans for his nursery, etc. I was convinced that my second one would be a girl. Turns out he is the most adorable baby with a fabulous disposition and I couldn't imagine life without him. He is healthy and happy, and that's all that matters. Being a mom to boys is a wonderful gift. Boys are curious and rambunctious and tons of fun. Congratulations!

PS - my sister is pregnant with baby boy #2. When she met with her doc after the ultrasound I think he could sense that she and her husband were a little disappointed that it wasn't a girl. The doc went into great detail about how difficult teenage girls are (apparently he has a few) and told them to thank their lucky stars they were having a boy

[Anonymous]

Poor boys! Seems like we all want girls!

I can totally relate - after we found it was a boy, I suddenly felt so sad I wasn't going to have a daughter (this time around, at least). That feeling really surprised me because I didn't realize I had a preference until that moment. But it didn't last long - pretty soon I adjusted to the thought of having a boy and now, a month away from the due date, I can't wait to meet the little guy!

I too felt SO guilty about having this total random feeling. What really didn't help was people asking me what the sex was, and I would tell them in a happy, friendly manner, and then a few people actually had the nerve to ask whether I was disappointed. Honestly! The truth is I WAS disappointed at first, but I don't really want to admit that to people or talk about it! I chalk that up to yet another inappropriate thing to say to pregnant ladies.

[Anonymous]

When we found out it was a girl, I was thrilled and my husband was clearly a bit disappointed...although he tried to hide it (not very well). He felt terribly guilty about his reaction. Once we started referring to "her" and "our little girl", he's thrilled with excitement. There is nothing wrong with having a bit of a preference before....it's just natural.

[Anonymous]

The funny thing is how life has changed. When I was pregnant with number 1, I longed for a boy (had visions of a little one with the strength and character of my hubby and little league) and was so upset when I was told it was a girl that I literally stayed in bed for a week. My husband was a rock-he truly was just happy and that made me even more mortified. So I had the little girl and she is the sunshine of our lives. I think my worries were over my complicated feelings about mother daughter relationships and hearing that little girls were dificult. Now that I am used to my little girl, the opposite happened when I found out I was having a little boy-this time though I am sort of laughing at the irony.

[Anonymous]

Same experience as so many others here--always always wanted a girl. Found it it was a boy and was surprised, and sad. Tried to embrace this during pregnancy but was always a tad tinged with the wish for a girl. Don;t know when--maybe some time in the few months after he was born--all changed. And now that he is almost 2, with his own special personality, sweet face, loving heart--I cannot even recall what wanting a girl felt like. I would never trade my DS--EVER! he is the light of my life and what I live for. You will feel this way, too.

A little story for you: we were hanging out with some friends in their yard recently and the kids were running around. DS--out of the blue--comes right up to me, hands me a dandelion he picked, and says, "Here mommy." I said, "You're giving mommy a flower?" He just smiled. One of the nicest moments of my life.

[Anonymous]

My husband didn't want to find out the sex in advance, so I went through my entire pregnancy praying it was a girl. I needed a c-section, and (I'm embarrassed to say) I remember lying on the table as surgery started thinking "What if its not a girl? What will I do with a boy?" Well, it was a boy, and as soon as I saw him I fell in love. I absolutely adore our son and got over my desire for a girl immediately. I think most people do have some preference, but once the baby arrives its impossible to wish you'd had something different.