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pet peeve: Group gifts with no set amount...
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Anonymous
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Our preschool does 'group gifts' for the teacher. However, there is no suggested monetary amount. Also, not everyone does the group gift---some do their own gifts. I really hate this. I really like to be told in advance 'donate $X".
Last year, we ended up doing both an individual gift and a group gift because the whole thing was so confusing and I didn't feel enough ppl went in on the group gift to make it 'appreciative'. |
Anonymous
| I see the no set amount thing a lot. I also don't like it, but I don't want to look cheap but I also don't want to overdo it because we are on a budget. But, to be fair, it is a pain to be the person that organizes these things, and I'm glad that someone else takes the lead on it. |
Anonymous
| OP -- I hear you, but I am curious what amount would be appropriate to ask? I am the room mother for my son's daycare classroom and am currently coordinating a group gift. In the past there was never a set amount and that has always bothered me, but I am really hesitant to ask for an amount that may be inappropriately low or high. My sense is that some parents enjoy the group gift because it eliminates the embarassment of just handing the teacher cash and there are a wide variety of income levels (I'm guessing) in my son's class. The gift will be cash. |
Anonymous
The ambiguity with the 'group gift/no set amount' always stresses me out. For example, last year at our preschool some parents thought $10 was enough for the teachers group gifts (for 6 teachers!!) while others were contributing a few hundred dollars....and, of course, all signing the card. This was at a pricey NW preschool where everyone was of similar backgrounds....so then some of us ended up doing an individual and a group gift. It was a nightmare...with my friend that was in charge being yelled at by other parents. Ugh. Happy Holidays. |
Anonymous
OP here--- I have no idea!! Over the past 5 years we've been to different preschools, daycares, etc...all in the same 'area'...and I find the 'appropriate' amount varies GREATLY. At my firstborn's daycare--parents would do individual gifts around $150....but at second born's school the rate was around $25...then--my other son was in a situation where there were 6 rotating teachers (yet one more primary) and it was confusing what to do there. What I usually end up doing is chatting up the other parents about it and finding out the school's 'going rate'...and then if I think it is too low..I may do a little on the side. I usu. prefer VISA cards or cash because I think so many preschool and daycare teachers are underpaid to begin with. |
Anonymous
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This comes up frequently when getting a group to make donations.
Here is the solution: Tell people how much you hope to spend on the group present (and ideally what that present will be). Those who really care can divide by the number of students and see how much to contribute. Those who are on a budget can put in what they feel is a compromise between what they can afford and what is required. And generous people can give more. |
Anonymous
| We contribute $100 to each classroom (we have two kids in Pre-K), and then I give the teachers in each room a card signed by my kids and a plate of brownies or cookies. Each room has 3-4 teachers, so it comes to about $25-$30 for each. |
Anonymous
I like this. |
Anonymous
| I'm a room parent at DCs daycare. For teacher birthdays, we say we'd like to give each teacher $100. Divide that by the number of parents in the room and you get your suggested contribution. We have some parents who give $10 and some parents who give $100 on their own. But at least there's is a guide. |
Anonymous
| What do folks usually give to elementary school teachers? Assuming a group gift, what is the appropriate amount? I've seen folks kick in $10-20, which I think is too low (we usually give a $50 gift card to the classroom teacher and lesser amounts to the music, art, PE teachers). What do others do? |
Anonymous
| Our suggested group gift is $20 per child. The goal is to give each full time staff member (primary teachers, special teachers, etc) $100. Our family usually does something beyond the group gift. Some families do and others don't. |
Anonymous
| Put in what you can afford because no one knows your financial obligations and you should not be forced to put in more than you can afford. In any case, all donations should be confidential. |
Anonymous
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Just don't do group gifts. it's too hard to make it fair and, frankly, I resent being told i should be able to contribute a certain amount.
Everyone can go out and get a gift card if they can afford it, send in cookies if they can't, etc. |
Anonymous
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Room Mom here...this is such a difficult topic. If you put an amount...everyone has an opinion about it and if it is too large or too small. That is why I ask people to give what they want and that it is strictly voluntary.
It all usually works itself out. Frankly I am so busy collecting the money and getting the gifts I don't have time to focus on who gave what and whether I think it is the right amount and I would certainly never discuss with anyone how much another family gives. If you do not like how it is run in your school you can always volunteer to do it your own way next year! 
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