Since people are now redshirting spring bday kids

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My nephew is currently an 18 year old junior (November birthday). He will graduate at 19 1/2. My SIL is having issues with him, and we mentioned this would be an issue when she decided to redshirt him. They live in Florida, so rules must be different. He was very shy, but still bright as a young child.

My son is also a junior, but is 13 months younger. He has mentioned that D (nephew) is embarrassed, and D prefaces conversations about graduation/grade level with, "I should be a senior, but...".

It's difficult for him, and SIL came to the realization and corrected it with her younger son.

I'm not anti redshirting for summer birthdays, but beyond that for NT kids? Yes, there should be a limit.

I think your nephew's problems likely result from the fact that he has rude and judgmental jerks in his family. You should teach your child not to gossip about his cousin, for heaven's sake. Such appalling behavior!

Okay crazy lady.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My nephew is currently an 18 year old junior (November birthday). He will graduate at 19 1/2. My SIL is having issues with him, and we mentioned this would be an issue when she decided to redshirt him. They live in Florida, so rules must be different. He was very shy, but still bright as a young child.

My son is also a junior, but is 13 months younger. He has mentioned that D (nephew) is embarrassed, and D prefaces conversations about graduation/grade level with, "I should be a senior, but...".

It's difficult for him, and SIL came to the realization and corrected it with her younger son.

I'm not anti redshirting for summer birthdays, but beyond that for NT kids? Yes, there should be a limit.

I think your nephew's problems likely result from the fact that he has rude and judgmental jerks in his family. You should teach your child not to gossip about his cousin, for heaven's sake. Such appalling behavior!

Okay crazy lady.

Poor kid. What a crappy, mean family your nephew has.

[Anonymous]

We are horrible, horrible people. Noted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are horrible, horrible people. Noted.

If you don't want to be thought of as horrible, you shouldn't post about how horribly you act.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Best countries don't even begin to teach reading until 7. Holding back preschoolers is a GOOD practice under today's high pressure environment.

Because kindergarten is all about READING?

I think what bugsme is that parents are holding children back based on one metric. Isn’t that what these years of school are about?

Everyone wants their children to be perfect, and to never face failure. But that’s not the way the real world works, is it? Most of these redshirted children are FINE. Their parents really just don’t whey them to ever face adversity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are horrible, horrible people. Noted.

If you don't want to be thought of as horrible, you shouldn't post about how horribly you act.

You are really insane. How dare I discuss parenting/school issues with my son or sister in law? JC lady it wasn't about you. My SIL is open to discussing it.

To be honest, I DGAF what you think of me. It actually amuses me that my post upset you to such a degree.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My nephew is currently an 18 year old junior (November birthday). He will graduate at 19 1/2. My SIL is having issues with him, and we mentioned this would be an issue when she decided to redshirt him. They live in Florida, so rules must be different. He was very shy, but still bright as a young child.

My son is also a junior, but is 13 months younger. He has mentioned that D (nephew) is embarrassed, and D prefaces conversations about graduation/grade level with, "I should be a senior, but...".

It's difficult for him, and SIL came to the realization and corrected it with her younger son.

I'm not anti redshirting for summer birthdays, but beyond that for NT kids? Yes, there should be a limit.

I think your nephew's problems likely result from the fact that he has rude and judgmental jerks in his family. You should teach your child not to gossip about his cousin, for heaven's sake. Such appalling behavior!

Poor boy... I hope you and your son are being nice about it, support him and tell him that it makes no difference when one graduates


Okay crazy lady.

Poor kid. What a crappy, mean family your nephew has.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Best countries don't even begin to teach reading until 7. Holding back preschoolers is a GOOD practice under today's high pressure environment.

Because kindergarten is all about READING?

I think what bugs me is that parents are holding children back based on one metric. Isn’t that what these years of school are about?

Everyone wants their children to be perfect, and to never face failure. But that’s not the way the real world works, is it? Most of these redshirted children are FINE. Their parents really just don’t whey them to ever face adversity.

Agree, and kids face adversity either way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are horrible, horrible people. Noted.

If you don't want to be thought of as horrible, you shouldn't post about how horribly you act.

You are really insane. How dare I discuss parenting/school issues with my son or sister in law? JC lady it wasn't about you. My SIL is open to discussing it.

To be honest, I DGAF what you think of me. It actually amuses me that my post upset you to such a degree.

You seem triggered.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Best countries don't even begin to teach reading until 7. Holding back preschoolers is a GOOD practice under today's high pressure environment.

Because kindergarten is all about READING?

I think what bugsme is that parents are holding children back based on one metric. Isn’t that what these years of school are about?

Everyone wants their children to be perfect, and to never face failure. But that’s not the way the real world works, is it? Most of these redshirted children are FINE. Their parents really just don’t whey them to ever face adversity.

Wow, amazing you know so much about everyone else's children! PS: in the so-called real world, groupings based strictly on age don't happen. If you're petrified your child will be disadvantaged because another kid redshirted, maybe you should look in the mirror about unrealistic expectations for your kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Best countries don't even begin to teach reading until 7. Holding back preschoolers is a GOOD practice under today's high pressure environment.

Because kindergarten is all about READING?

I think what bugsme is that parents are holding children back based on one metric. Isn’t that what these years of school are about?

Everyone wants their children to be perfect, and to never face failure. But that’s not the way the real world works, is it? Most of these redshirted children are FINE. Their parents really just don’t whey them to ever face adversity.

Wow, amazing you know so much about everyone else's children! PS: in the so-called real world, groupings based strictly on age don't happen. If you're petrified your child will be disadvantaged because another kid redshirted, maybe you should look in the mirror about unrealistic expectations for your kid.

DP. Down, girl. You keep attacking people. Why are you so vicious?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Best countries don't even begin to teach reading until 7. Holding back preschoolers is a GOOD practice under today's high pressure environment.

Because kindergarten is all about READING?

I think what bugsme is that parents are holding children back based on one metric. Isn’t that what these years of school are about?

Everyone wants their children to be perfect, and to never face failure. But that’s not the way the real world works, is it? Most of these redshirted children are FINE. Their parents really just don’t whey them to ever face adversity.

Wow, amazing you know so much about everyone else's children! PS: in the so-called real world, groupings based strictly on age don't happen. If you're petrified your child will be disadvantaged because another kid redshirted, maybe you should look in the mirror about unrealistic expectations for your kid.

DP. Down, girl. You keep attacking people. Why are you so vicious?

DP. It's so funny how the nasty anti-redshirt posters react when given a taste of their own medicine. Such delicate flowers.

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people I take issue with are those who redshirt in order to give their kid the "advantage" of being the oldest/biggest/most mature/etc kid in class. Those are the people in a race to the bottom, in my opinion.

That's different from the argument that all kids should start K at, say, 6, instead of 5. Assuming you're working within an annual grade framework, you're still always going to have an oldest kid and a youngest kid in class, and all of the challenges associated with having kids nearly a full year apart operating under the same curriculum. But at least you could argue here that even the youngest kid was "ready" to start K at the start of the school year.

One is wanting to redshirt because you want your kid to rule over all of the others; the other is in favor of redshirting everyone for the sake of community.

What is your issue with the first family? They want their kid to be the most mature in the class. So? What does it have to do with you or your kid?

My issue is that it's an arms race that ultimately widens the developmental range within the classroom. I'm not arguing that there's no benefit to being the most mature in the class, but you realize that when everyone skirts the "rules" (recognizing that it sounds like most of the schools in question are soft on the rules) you're just left with a bunch of older kids -- only one of whom will still be the "most" mature in class -- and a bunch of kids who are much much younger. The system starts to break down. Certainly other factors influence the classroom dynamics, including teaching styles, curriculum, and different family values (some prioritizing sports prowess, or wanting school to be a platform for excellence rather than a place where one can learn about failure and resilience, and excellence), but I strongly believe that redshirting contributes to an environment that I think is ultimately destructive to the community.

I'm the PP from several pages ago with a kid in the NYC public school system, where red shirting is not an option. I will not hold the NYC public school system up as the gold standard, but I will defend its prohibition on red shirting. FWIW, DD has a November birthday; grade cutoffs are Dec 31, so she's certainly among the youngest in her class. But there are kids ranging from Jan 1 to Dec 31 in her grade.

Exactly. This also reminds me of anti-vaxxers--sure, if just one family makes a decision outside the norm for their particular child, no biggie, right? But what happens is that when more and more people do it, it creates issues. In the case of redshirters, when enough people do it, it changes class dynamics, creates challenges for teachers, etc. For anti-vaxxers, when enough people do it, it compromises herd immunity. What's fine for an individual doesn't serve the greater good.

New poster to this part of the thread and I agree with you both. I am another mom literally in the same position as New Yorker mom PP - public, absolute cutoff of 12/31, and a child born on late November. I feel the same about the impacts and the pro-redshirt PP who torqued her little antivaxxer analogy got the parties swapped.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Best countries don't even begin to teach reading until 7. Holding back preschoolers is a GOOD practice under today's high pressure environment.

Because kindergarten is all about READING?

I think what bugsme is that parents are holding children back based on one metric. Isn’t that what these years of school are about?

Everyone wants their children to be perfect, and to never face failure. But that’s not the way the real world works, is it? Most of these redshirted children are FINE. Their parents really just don’t whey them to ever face adversity.

Wow, amazing you know so much about everyone else's children! PS: in the so-called real world, groupings based strictly on age don't happen. If you're petrified your child will be disadvantaged because another kid redshirted, maybe you should look in the mirror about unrealistic expectations for your kid.

DP. Down, girl. You keep attacking people. Why are you so vicious?

DP. It's so funny how the nasty anti-redshirt posters react when given a taste of their own medicine. Such delicate flowers.

Are you for real? Who has attacked you IRL for redshirting? I’m curious. I can’t imagine that ever happened.