Dad rides in first while two young daughters ride in coach.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I took a flight to Orlando today and there was a dad who sat in first class while his two daughters, around ages 11-13 and 7-9 sat midway back in coach. I can’t help but judge this dad harshly, and thought that you might want to join in.

May be dad got an upgrade, has a bad back or girls wanted to sit together. I wouldn't assume anything. If spouse gets an upgrade, kid or I get it if its a pleasure flight and he gets it if we are accompanying him on a work trip and he has to go to a meeting after arrival. If all things equal, whichever one of us is tiered or sleepy, that person gets the upgraded seat. I don't get why man has to be sacrificial goat every time. Be fair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not cool. I would not leave young kids and/or tween/teen girls on their own on a plane.

Here's a more heart-warming story: I was on a flight from CA yesterday. Across the aisle, the husband in an older South Asian couple was offered an upgrade to first class. He said no and tried to get his wife to take the seat. She said no too. They both wound up staying in their window/middle seats in economy.

Waaaat they sound like martyrs. Older so no young kids to take care of and presumably married for a while… they should not need to be attached at the hip!!

As a South Asian myself, what they did does not surprise me at all. It’s a cultural thing.

I am South Asian as well and have no idea what cultural thing you are talking about. After 14 years of marriage I would definitely take the upgrade. After 45 years of marriage my parents would as well!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Smart dad. They’re not toddlers.

Smart dad because he outsourced his kids’ needs to the people flying in economy? I don’t want to sit next to someone else’s kids. It’s going to make me feel responsible for them and I resent that.

Look, this thread is about whether people would judge. Yes, I’m going to judge.

Your feeling responsible despite not actually BEING responsible is your own issue. Nobody's fault but your own.

Oh god, I know the type. They feel like no one is taking care of things and interject where they are not needed or wanted.

These are the same mothers that show up to their adult children's job interviews or call their college professors demanding a grade change for their snowflake.

I’m the PP who is resentful that I may have to step in and parent your “perfect” children.

I’ve been in this situation. The “perfect” child next to me repeatedly got up/down to the bathroom, kept dropping things I had to retrieve, needed to go talk to mom, needed help with headphones, etc. I had to step in several times and help because real Mom was too busy ignoring her own responsibilities, probably assuming her “perfect” child wasn’t bothering anyone.

Look, you do you. If you’re comfortable throwing your children on other people so you can fly in peace, then just own it and know people judge.

Your judgement means nothing. You really think other people care what you think? We don’t.

Eh. Clearly you do care. If you didn’t, you wouldn’t bother replying.

There are plenty of us on this thread who can’t fathom “demoting” (one poster’s word) our children to another part of the plane so other passengers have to deal with them. If the idea of our judgment doesn’t bother you, then just keep doing it. It’s not like some DCUM post is going to stop you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not cool. I would not leave young kids and/or tween/teen girls on their own on a plane.

Here's a more heart-warming story: I was on a flight from CA yesterday. Across the aisle, the husband in an older South Asian couple was offered an upgrade to first class. He said no and tried to get his wife to take the seat. She said no too. They both wound up staying in their window/middle seats in economy.

Waaaat they sound like martyrs. Older so no young kids to take care of and presumably married for a while… they should not need to be attached at the hip!!

Feel sad for your marriage/relationship. You should too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would anyone take issue with this? The kids aren’t infants. They’re 40 feet away at most, in an enclosed space.

We have our kids fly First/Business with us when we can, but often (particularly on domestic flights) there won’t be enough seats available. Kids get demoted first. They’re small, know how to fly/behave, and again—not infants who need a parent nearby.

It’s awkward for the adults who have to ride next to your young children. We end up stepping in for you when all we want is a quiet ride to our destination.

Of course I’m going to think of you as selfish and detached. It’s hard not to as I’m helping your child open a snack, etc.

My 10 year old knows how to open a bag of pretzels, thanks.

If you spoke to or otherwise interacted with him beyond maybe an initial head nod or “hello” when first sitting down, he’d have his guard up about you being a weirdo.

Your ten year old still can need help. It's not just snacks. If you cannot sit with your 10 year old, leave them home with the nanny who actually raises them.

Some of us have 10 year olds who are independent and we raised them ourselves. For example I personally put the time in to teach them to cook, do their own laundry, and do basic chores around the house starting when they were 6. No nanny! Now, at 10, they can fly by themselves, go to the store, they even have their own investment accounts. Perhaps your kids aren't very bright, mine have demonstrated responsibility and I don't give them tasks they cannot handle. Watching a movie and eating m&ms a few steps away from me? They can handle that.

No 10 year old is independent. If you cannot be bothered with a 10 year old on vacation, leave them home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not cool. I would not leave young kids and/or tween/teen girls on their own on a plane.

Here's a more heart-warming story: I was on a flight from CA yesterday. Across the aisle, the husband in an older South Asian couple was offered an upgrade to first class. He said no and tried to get his wife to take the seat. She said no too. They both wound up staying in their window/middle seats in economy.

Waaaat they sound like martyrs. Older so no young kids to take care of and presumably married for a while… they should not need to be attached at the hip!!

Why not? DP here, and I think it's lovely that an older couple still wants to sit together.

+1. It's about being with your best friend, not comfort.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents in first are separated from their children in coach so how do they know how their children are behaving?

Uh, they check on them periodically? duh. you know we’ve got these things called legs. We can stand on them walk back ask if everything is ok and walk back again. It even helps prevent deep vein thrombosis.

Then you become a nuisance to the flight attendants and to the people stuck sitting next to your kids.

[Anonymous]

I would not do that to girls, especially that age, as you could be asking for trouble from male passengers. But that's just me. Apparently this dad didn't care or think about anything happening, like most men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents in first are separated from their children in coach so how do they know how their children are behaving?

Uh, they check on them periodically? duh. you know we’ve got these things called legs. We can stand on them walk back ask if everything is ok and walk back again. It even helps prevent deep vein thrombosis.

Then you become a nuisance to the flight attendants and to the people stuck sitting next to your kids.

I’m ok with that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As the older sibling in this scenario, I hated it when I had to be in charge of my younger siblings. It affected my relationship with my parents for a long time and impacted my choice of when and if I was going to be a parent myself.

Good to see that you kept everything in proportion.

We don't tell our oldest they are in charge of the younger ones. Each kid is in charge of themselves in our family. Sorry your parents put you in a position you felt was difficult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I definitely judge. And I wouldn't take an upgrade if it meant leaving my husband in coach (and vice versa). Why? Because I'm not that desperate to have more comfort without my family! I prefer their company.

None of my friends would do any of these things either.

so you are short and petite and all your friends are too?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents in first are separated from their children in coach so how do they know how their children are behaving?

Uh, they check on them periodically? duh. you know we’ve got these things called legs. We can stand on them walk back ask if everything is ok and walk back again. It even helps prevent deep vein thrombosis.

Then you become a nuisance to the flight attendants and to the people stuck sitting next to your kids.

I’m ok with that.

I’m hoping you’re a troll trying to stir things up. The idea I might actually share space on this Earth with someone who actually is okay with that… yuck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents in first are separated from their children in coach so how do they know how their children are behaving?

Uh, they check on them periodically? duh. you know we’ve got these things called legs. We can stand on them walk back ask if everything is ok and walk back again. It even helps prevent deep vein thrombosis.

Then you become a nuisance to the flight attendants and to the people stuck sitting next to your kids.

I’m ok with that.

I’m hoping you’re a troll trying to stir things up. The idea I might actually share space on this Earth with someone who actually is okay with that… yuck.

There are lots of us. The horror!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents in first are separated from their children in coach so how do they know how their children are behaving?

Uh, they check on them periodically? duh. you know we’ve got these things called legs. We can stand on them walk back ask if everything is ok and walk back again. It even helps prevent deep vein thrombosis.

Then you become a nuisance to the flight attendants and to the people stuck sitting next to your kids.

I’m ok with that.

I’m hoping you’re a troll trying to stir things up. The idea I might actually share space on this Earth with someone who actually is okay with that… yuck.

There are lots of us. The horror!

Yeah, it is rather horrific when people ignore their own obligations and responsibilities, thereby inconveniencing others. We agree.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As the older sibling in this scenario, I hated it when I had to be in charge of my younger siblings. It affected my relationship with my parents for a long time and impacted my choice of when and if I was going to be a parent myself.

Good to see that you kept everything in proportion.

We don't tell our oldest they are in charge of the younger ones. Each kid is in charge of themselves in our family. Sorry your parents put you in a position you felt was difficult.

Wow, just wow.