Walking dates complaints

[Anonymous]

I don't expect someone to spend a lot of money, but I would prefer a first date to involve getting coffee or similar prior to walking. Happy to pay for my own, but I wouldn't meet with a friend to just walk around and not grab something to drink or snack, so don't see why a date would be different.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a woman, I would want to know a guy is interested in me. Not putting something out there (whether its a thoughtful gesture or spending some money on a date-doesn't have to be a lot) bothers me. Going on walks is cheap in many ways. He can be taking multiple walks a day, multiple days a week...

I mean, if he’s going on this many dates, you can see his viewpoint about not wanting to spend money every time, right?

The point is the they need to filter online options out better BEFORE meeting. No one (save someone with zero social life) should be going on so many first dates that they can’t afford it. One might ask why they don’t get beyond the first date so often…

It’s not really for you to tell someone else how to date or spend their money. Accept the date or don’t.

DP and I agree with this, but at the same time, it’s not for guys to tell women what kind of dates they should accept. If he doesn’t want to take a woman to dinner on a first date, by all means, don’t! Just don’t be mad if she declines a walk date.

Some people are just willing to accept less. I don’t know if it low self esteem or lack of options.

I’m always surprised at how bad women are willing to be treated including a man not putting in any effort for a first date.

Plenty of women on this thread have provided reasons why the would accept or prefer first walking dates. Not a single one has to do with low self esteem or lack of options.

I pity you. You equate money with effort and a measure of treatment. You, and those like you, are examples of people I've advised my kids to avoid dating.

Effort does not require money. Attraction and interest are not amplified by food. A 'walking date' does not mean there are no options or opportunities for refreshments only that you get to know each other while walking rather than seated. I, and many people I know, are nervous on first dates. Movement helps reduce the intensity.

[Anonymous]

I think it’s really cute that women are complaining about these types of dates.

You’re single, and there’s a reason for that. If you’re weeding people out because they don’t want to lavish money on someone they’ve never met, then have you co sides that some of the issue is you and your perceived “worth”?

Assuming you catch a good guy, how would you feel
Knowing he had to spend $10k ($200/ week) to apparently find you? You’d think he was an idiot and that money would be better spent on a house, a ring for you, etc.

[Anonymous]

I would much rather take a walk in a pretty park or along a river than sit in a crowded Starbucks with some dude on his laptop to my right, a harried mother doling out cakepops to my left. This does not exactly set the stage for romance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a woman, I would want to know a guy is interested in me. Not putting something out there (whether its a thoughtful gesture or spending some money on a date-doesn't have to be a lot) bothers me. Going on walks is cheap in many ways. He can be taking multiple walks a day, multiple days a week...

I mean, if he’s going on this many dates, you can see his viewpoint about not wanting to spend money every time, right?

The point is the they need to filter online options out better BEFORE meeting. No one (save someone with zero social life) should be going on so many first dates that they can’t afford it. One might ask why they don’t get beyond the first date so often…

It’s not really for you to tell someone else how to date or spend their money. Accept the date or don’t.

DP and I agree with this, but at the same time, it’s not for guys to tell women what kind of dates they should accept. If he doesn’t want to take a woman to dinner on a first date, by all means, don’t! Just don’t be mad if she declines a walk date.

Some people are just willing to accept less. I don’t know if it low self esteem or lack of options.

I’m always surprised at how bad women are willing to be treated including a man not putting in any effort for a first date.

Plenty of women on this thread have provided reasons why the would accept or prefer first walking dates. Not a single one has to do with low self esteem or lack of options.

I pity you. You equate money with effort and a measure of treatment. You, and those like you, are examples of people I've advised my kids to avoid dating.

Effort does not require money. Attraction and interest are not amplified by food. A 'walking date' does not mean there are no options or opportunities for refreshments only that you get to know each other while walking rather than seated. I, and many people I know, are nervous on first dates. Movement helps reduce the intensity.

My comment was less about a first date and more about how bad a woman is willing to be treated. There are many women who are treated less than well and they stay in bad relationships or marriages. It has nothing to do with money. I met Dh when he was a poor grad student. He gave me his all from the very beginning. He wasn’t trying to meet and date multiple women at once. He was only trying to date me. While he earns a seven figure income now, he had no income when he was in graduate school.

[Anonymous]

One of my favorite dates with my now DH was a walking date. This was back around 2009 when we both lived in Clarendon. We grabbed a coffee and then just walked around talking for a couple hours. It was a really nice way to enjoy a pretty day outside and get to know each other better. To this day we love taking walks and talking to each other.

I didn’t meet him through online dating, but I did use it to meet guys back in the day and found myself roped into dinners with guys I could tell I wasn’t interested in within a few minutes. I think coffee and a walk is a great way to dip your toe into getting to know someone without the formality of dinner and potentially giving up hours of your life.

[Anonymous]

I realize my opinions are dated since I have never done online dating. I guess it is about how you meet and hang out also. Almost all meetings with my friends include a coffee, meal or bar meet up. Sure, we may go for a walk or run or do an activity together but it begins or ends with some sort of food or drink.

Even when I was a student, I ate out a lot and still do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I realize my opinions are dated since I have never done online dating. I guess it is about how you meet and hang out also. Almost all meetings with my friends include a coffee, meal or bar meet up. Sure, we may go for a walk or run or do an activity together but it begins or ends with some sort of food or drink.

Even when I was a student, I ate out a lot and still do.

I agree that it’s better to sit down with tea or coffee. Walking dates raise bathroom concern to me; also wind blowing my hair so I won’t look presentable to him.

[Anonymous]

I think for women who don't like walking dates, it's a perceived value thing. Everybody knows if a dude matched with, say, Sydney Sweeney, he ain't asking her to take a walk or anything else low effort/low investment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think for women who don't like walking dates, it's a perceived value thing. Everybody knows if a dude matched with, say, Sydney Sweeney, he ain't asking her to take a walk or anything else low effort/low investment.

These women need to adjust their perceptions of themselves and their expectations. And I say that as a woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think for women who don't like walking dates, it's a perceived value thing. Everybody knows if a dude matched with, say, Sydney Sweeney, he ain't asking her to take a walk or anything else low effort/low investment.

These women need to adjust their perceptions of themselves and their expectations. And I say that as a woman.

I look better than her and indeed, men always invite me for restaurants as first intro. I always decline and offer a coffee date

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One of my favorite dates with my now DH was a walking date. This was back around 2009 when we both lived in Clarendon. We grabbed a coffee and then just walked around talking for a couple hours. It was a really nice way to enjoy a pretty day outside and get to know each other better. To this day we love taking walks and talking to each other.

I didn’t meet him through online dating, but I did use it to meet guys back in the day and found myself roped into dinners with guys I could tell I wasn’t interested in within a few minutes. I think coffee and a walk is a great way to dip your toe into getting to know someone without the formality of dinner and potentially giving up hours of your life.

My first date with my now DH was a walking date, too. 28 years later, we still talk about that walk; it went on forever because neither of us wanted it to end.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think for women who don't like walking dates, it's a perceived value thing. Everybody knows if a dude matched with, say, Sydney Sweeney, he ain't asking her to take a walk or anything else low effort/low investment.

These women need to adjust their perceptions of themselves and their expectations. And I say that as a woman.

That actress is not naturally attractive even!
https://www.reddit.com/r/euphoria/comments/17ve2v3/second_time_watching_reality_with_sydney_sweeney/?rdt=64115

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think for women who don't like walking dates, it's a perceived value thing. Everybody knows if a dude matched with, say, Sydney Sweeney, he ain't asking her to take a walk or anything else low effort/low investment.

These women need to adjust their perceptions of themselves and their expectations. And I say that as a woman.

That actress is not naturally attractive even!
https://www.reddit.com/r/euphoria/comments/17ve2v3/second_time_watching_reality_with_sydney_sweeney/?rdt=64115

Yep, and she’s being offered non walking dates. So, maybe time to adjust your self assessment parameters if that’s what you’re being approached with. Or, you can remain single on principle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think for women who don't like walking dates, it's a perceived value thing. Everybody knows if a dude matched with, say, Sydney Sweeney, he ain't asking her to take a walk or anything else low effort/low investment.

I’m the pp who said women are willing to accept not being treated well.

I’m pretty if a guy matched with someone who looked like Kendall Jenner, he is not taking her on some walking date. It is the girl who is borderline that he may or may not think will be worth sitting with and spending that $20 or $50 or $100 would be a waste of money.