False Accusations

[Anonymous]

Has anyone ever dealt with false accusations against their child (under 10 years old) on a sports team? I am specifically pertaining to false accusations of bullying/racism/harassment? How did you handle it? How did the coach/club handle it?

[Anonymous]

Wut

[Anonymous]

introspection and eyes wide open

[Anonymous]

If you’re really convinced it didn’t happen, see if you can come up with next steps that are positive and make everyone happy while not requiring consensus about what happened.

[Anonymous]

Yes. A crazy blue haired mom accused my dd of making anti trans comments to her 12 year old “trans” daughter. Nobody even knew the kid was trans. (Since then the kid shifted over to boys sports, but now identifies as a girl again and plays girls sports in high school). We denied it, called her out on it, and reported it to the association. The coach knew the lady (he said does this every year and just ignore it) and wanted no part of it. Not sure what the association actually did but she calmed down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes. A crazy blue haired mom accused my dd of making anti trans comments to her 12 year old “trans” daughter. Nobody even knew the kid was trans. (Since then the kid shifted over to boys sports, but now identifies as a girl again and plays girls sports in high school). We denied it, called her out on it, and reported it to the association. The coach knew the lady (he said does this every year and just ignore it) and wanted no part of it. Not sure what the association actually did but she calmed down.

How was a 12 year old playing in high school? How was a ten year old playing with a high school player? This was a natural born girl playing girls sports?

[Anonymous]

And how did racism factor in?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. A crazy blue haired mom accused my dd of making anti trans comments to her 12 year old “trans” daughter. Nobody even knew the kid was trans. (Since then the kid shifted over to boys sports, but now identifies as a girl again and plays girls sports in high school). We denied it, called her out on it, and reported it to the association. The coach knew the lady (he said does this every year and just ignore it) and wanted no part of it. Not sure what the association actually did but she calmed down.

How was a 12 year old playing in high school? How was a ten year old playing with a high school player? This was a natural born girl playing girls sports?

Sorry I was unclear on the timeline. This happened when my daughter was 12, but she’s out of high school now. A couple years after the event the accuser played coed for a season (club), then boys freshman year of high school, then back to girls for the rest of high school. I don’t know if she ever started the transition process.

[Anonymous]

So did your kid make a racist comment or what? Are you thinking It’s not bullying because they only “did it one time“? It’s not harassment because it’s not repeated behavior? You need to explain more about what’s going on because it sounds like you’ll defend your kid no matter what.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Has anyone ever dealt with false accusations against their child (under 10 years old) on a sports team? I am specifically pertaining to false accusations of bullying/racism/harassment? How did you handle it? How did the coach/club handle it?

People don’t just throw accusations.

Whatever they said he did, he did that sh!t

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Has anyone ever dealt with false accusations against their child (under 10 years old) on a sports team? I am specifically pertaining to false accusations of bullying/racism/harassment? How did you handle it? How did the coach/club handle it?

People don’t just throw accusations.

Whatever they said he did, he did that sh!t

I think this is worth considering- but tween boys absolutely do just "throw accusations." I have absolutely seen two kids getting into it, going back and forth, and when one of them decides he is done, he goes and tattles on the other kid. Even though they were both being total asses. This is pretty standard ES behavior (I'm a teacher). So parent should absolutely have eyes wide open, and have some frank conversations with parents of the kids' friends, in addition to their own kid. But...it could be nothing

[Anonymous]

OP—it’s involving two girls. My child said why is your hair so curly and the other parent ran with it. I did file a complain with the association. Both children are under 10 years old.

[Anonymous]

You’re child has no filter

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP—it’s involving two girls. My child said why is your hair so curly and the other parent ran with it. I did file a complain with the association. Both children are under 10 years old.

When you say "under 10" do you mean 9 or 6... If the former, she is old enough for you to discuss and her to understand why asking that type of question could make someone uncomfortable unintentionally (why are you so fat? why is your skin so light/dark/freckled? why do you only have one eyebrow?); if the latter, I wouldn't make a big deal out of it personally, think I think it would be difficult to explain in a helpful way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You’re child has no filter

You are on the spectrum.