What’s with fitting rooms? What do I *actually* look like?

[Anonymous]

I was feeling really good about my body, until I visited some stores this weekend and was visually assaulted by my own reflection I the mirrors of the fitting rooms. It made me go to the internet in search of answers and I found this picture:



At home, I look like the “Gap” or “H&M” examples, but in fitting rooms, I’m always a “Topshop” or “John Lewis”. The consensus online is that the issue is mirror distortion due to cheap mirrors and harsh overhead lighting.

But this begs the question: Is this what I actually look like outside in the sun (harsh, overhead lighting) or in a house/building using overhead lights?

Do we ever really know what we actually look like?

[Anonymous]

Odds are good that whatever you try on will look better anywhere than in the dressing room mirror. The woman in the photos is wearing a form-fitting dress without foundational garments, so the effects of lighting that creates shadows from every bulge are emphasized. Most outfits are more forgiving. If you do choose more body conscious outfits from time to time, wear smoothing undergarments and consider that black and darker colors are usually more flattering because they conceal the shadows.

[Anonymous]

She should have taken some outdoor photos

[Anonymous]

All I know is that the Nordstrom dressing room mirrors are the worst

[Anonymous]

I take a pic of myself in my outfit before I leave the house in it to make sure what I look OK. What I see in the mirror can look differently than in a photo.

[Anonymous]

I don’t get why they cheap out on dressing rooms. This was the case before most shopping was online. How does that encourage people to buy their items?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I take a pic of myself in my outfit before I leave the house in it to make sure what I look OK. What I see in the mirror can look differently than in a photo.

You don’t look like what you see in photos of yourself, either. You’ll still look distorted because you’re seeing a 2D, static image of yourself, distorted by camera lens—look it up!

[Anonymous]

I mean, she looks like the same person (an attractive, slim, middle aged woman) in all the photos. Even the really unflattering ones, I'm not like "oh she's ugly and overweight." And in the very flattering ones, I don't magically think she's 22 or a size 0. Even in the "bad" photos, I can tell she's pretty and reasonably fit.

I get how you fee, though, OP. After a certain age, dressing room photos can feel really defeating. I'm not overweight but like this woman, I have a little bit of sag in my belly from pregnancy/childbirth. I also get bloated really easily now and actually have to pay attention to what I eat if I'm going to be wearing something form fitting, which I never had to think about before. My hair is a little coarser and though I cover my grays, sometimes I can still see them under the highlights, especially in very harsh lighting.

I've had shopping trips where I bought nothing, or conversely where I over spent, just because I found the mirror so defeating. But most of my life, I'm not under the level of scrutiny I put myself under in a dressing room mirror. Usually the light is more flattering (sunlight's almost always more flattering than a harsh dressing room unless it's midday and you standing right under it). And truthfully no one pays that much attention to how you look once you are over 40. Sad but true!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t get why they cheap out on dressing rooms. This was the case before most shopping was online. How does that encourage people to buy their items?

There’s actually a psychological reason for this: Insecurity Stimulus. “Some environments use poor, harsh lighting to create a "laboratory of insecurity," causing shoppers to feel desperate to fix their perceived flaws with new, flattering clothes.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t get why they cheap out on dressing rooms. This was the case before most shopping was online. How does that encourage people to buy their items?

That harsh overhead lighting is the worst. I'm sure it's cheap, and I understand it in like a Marshalls. But I get annoyed at places like Zara where the clothes can be pricier, often overpriced for what they are. Put in some directional lighting!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t get why they cheap out on dressing rooms. This was the case before most shopping was online. How does that encourage people to buy their items?

There’s actually a psychological reason for this: Insecurity Stimulus. “Some environments use poor, harsh lighting to create a "laboratory of insecurity," causing shoppers to feel desperate to fix their perceived flaws with new, flattering clothes.”

It doesn't work on me. I'll go into the dressing room full of optimism and then decided no, never mind, I might as well keep wearing my old clothes if that's how I look in something brand new. Why bother?

[Anonymous]

I think what I actually look like ranges a good amount. I can probably go from 5/10 to 9/10 over the course of 24 hours. Things like sleep, bloating, clothing, hair and makeup, and mood affect everything.

Give yourself some grace. I aim for "acceptable" when shopping, because I am so picky that if I tried to find things I loved, I would have no clothes.

I also don't mind accepting that I look less optimal sometimes because it motivates me to keep going through the rigamarole of maintaining my looks. After 40, I think most of it is putting in effort. On average, I probably look like a 7 to myself, a 9 to my loved ones, and a 5 at my worst.

[Anonymous]

I've said it once, I'll say it again. Everything in life is a fake illusion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All I know is that the Nordstrom dressing room mirrors are the worst

100%. And even more so with Nordstrom Rack. Totally off-putting. To the point where I have stopped shopping there....it's depressing.

[Anonymous]

Nordstrom is pure horror