Where can my 18-year old meet other Lesbians?

[Anonymous]

My 18 year old (they/them) identifies as a non-binary lesbian. They are neurodivergent and go to a private school one+ hours from us. They have a very small group of close friends at school (2 LGBTQ+ boys and another non-binary teen), but they all live far away and it is hard for them to get together outside of school. Also, the school is very small and my kid really wants to start dating. We live in Montgomery County. Any ideas of how they can meet similar aged girls or non-binary lesbians to hang out with and make new friends/connections? Most teens in our area go to neighborhood schools and have their own friend groups. We have done some social skills and/or LGBTQ+ teen groups but they tend to be much younger or primarily trans kids. Would love some ideas.

[Anonymous]

At college, which should be starting in a few months.

[Anonymous]

OP here: okay, oops, should have known better than to post on DCUM (I thought maybe this space would be better, although I have learned this lesson too many times and should not have posted. My kid is on the Autism spectrum, and explicitly asked me for suggestions to expand their social circle so that they can potentially meet new friends and start dating - I'm not asking for help with their SEX LIFE ffs (is this for real on the LGBTQIA+ board???). And no, they will NOT be going to college anytime soon. Some kids don't follow the typical trajectory.

[Anonymous]

I would look on Meetup. There are definitely some meetup groups targeted to younger LGBTQA people. They do hikes, meet to play board games, lots of things.
I will say that although there are a lot of neurodivergent young people in these groups, 18 and not in school or working could be difficult. No need to rush dating when they are still figuring out how to exist in the world.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would look on Meetup. There are definitely some meetup groups targeted to younger LGBTQA people. They do hikes, meet to play board games, lots of things.
I will say that although there are a lot of neurodivergent young people in these groups, 18 and not in school or working could be difficult. No need to rush dating when they are still figuring out how to exist in the world.

Thanks. They are in high school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would look on Meetup. There are definitely some meetup groups targeted to younger LGBTQA people. They do hikes, meet to play board games, lots of things.
I will say that although there are a lot of neurodivergent young people in these groups, 18 and not in school or working could be difficult. No need to rush dating when they are still figuring out how to exist in the world.

Thanks. They are in high school.

Sounds like homeschooling might be lonely. Most 17-18 year olds, even if neurodivergent, are in some sort of in-person school or program or activity and that seems to be where they meet other LGBTQ kids.

[Anonymous]

Is a bigger school possible next year? Classes at community college?

[Anonymous]

Theater groups?

[Anonymous]

I would just look for all ages female/sapphic friendly spaces. The Black Cat is all ages and frequently has queer friendly shows. Or As you are is all ages during the day — maybe she could watch an afternoon Spirit game there for example. Or maybe just join city girls who walk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would look on Meetup. There are definitely some meetup groups targeted to younger LGBTQA people. They do hikes, meet to play board games, lots of things.
I will say that although there are a lot of neurodivergent young people in these groups, 18 and not in school or working could be difficult. No need to rush dating when they are still figuring out how to exist in the world.

Thanks. They are in high school.

Sounds like homeschooling might be lonely. Most 17-18 year olds, even if neurodivergent, are in some sort of in-person school or program or activity and that seems to be where they meet other LGBTQ kids.

OMG. they are not homeschooled!! They are in a private, special ed school that they love but it is far away, fairly small, and they don't have friends they can see much outside of school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is a bigger school possible next year? Classes at community college?

A bigger school is not possible and they love their school and it has basically saved their life. But, yes - they will take classes at community college next year. So that's a good point, and they are a theater kid so maybe a large music/theater class would expand their pool of possible friends.

[Anonymous]

Start with interest groups, like there are pride alliance sports teams, musical groups, board game clubs, etc. Easier to bond over the interest. Go in hoping to make friends.

Once you meet more friends, your circle will expand, and then that's a better way to find dates, rather than dating within a small interest group.

[Anonymous]

MC TP/SS has queer tango weekly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is a bigger school possible next year? Classes at community college?

A bigger school is not possible and they love their school and it has basically saved their life. But, yes - they will take classes at community college next year. So that's a good point, and they are a theater kid so maybe a large music/theater class would expand their pool of possible friends.

Sounds like things are on a good track then.

[Anonymous]

There’s a Pride prom in MoCo coming up. My dd has gone for the past few years. It’s really welcoming and there are craft rooms and quiet rooms for kids who get overwhelmed and want to be there for the dance, but maybe not the whole time.!