I know collelge process is hard...
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Anonymous
| But I just feel incredibly sad since the top school of my DC said deferred. We've already followed with pertinent steps, and are waiting a decision. Also have other options. I know there are worse problems in the world and should consider myself lucky that this is our problem. Still, can't get out of this negative spiral. Feel totally bummed. Yes, maybe I'm also a snowflake. |
Anonymous
| It’s totally normal. |
Anonymous
| Don't beat yourself up! You're allowed to feel bad if your DC is sad or disappointed. As the parent, though, you can be the one to ground your kid with a wider perspective. If it helps, sometimes the second and third choice work out better than the dream school in the end. Maybe focus on the pluses of the options DC has. |
Anonymous
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Trust that it will work out as it's meant to, if your kid got deferred then clearly they have a good app and will have lots of other options. But I hear you, it's heartbreaking. Hey at least it's not a solid rejection, that is worse!
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Anonymous
| Deferral is not rejection. You still have a chance getting in RD |
Anonymous
| Thank you all! |
Anonymous
| Nobody gets everything they want. If kiddo has not learned that yet then this is a good life lesson. |
Anonymous
It often is. Admission rates after deferral at top30 schools are usually low single digits. I don't say this to be a jerk but rather I found it helpful to be realistic. |
Anonymous
| Ten years from now your child will not care about this one bit. They'll go where they'll go, and hopefully they will be happy with the decision. |
Anonymous
| The day my son got deferred from his dream school (which we correctly interpreted as a rejection), he was also admitted to several targets. We were all disappointed for about 15 minutes... and then we were fine with it. I suppose it depends on your particular mental make-up. |
Anonymous
| It’s ok to feel disappointed. It will pass and one day you won’t think about it at all anymore. |
Anonymous
| My kid was irritated at being deferred (ultimately waitlisted) at their top choice. They put it on the shelf and focused on the two target admits they had in hand at around the same time. Having an admit in hand can do a lot to take the sting out of a deferral. |
Anonymous
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Depends on which school, deferral to acceptance rate varies.
More importantly, deferral indicates that her application is strong. She will have some good results in RD. |
Anonymous
| Hang in there, mom! It’s an awful process for students and parents alike. |
Anonymous
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The worse thing they do is deferral followed by waitlist, stringing the student well into the summer.
Hope you will have a definitive answer in about two weeks. You will be fine. |