2T Private vs Very Good Public

[Anonymous]

Background - only child, will be going to K next year. We are zoned for a very good public school and can afford private without financial aid. We are also recent immigrants to the U.S., non-Ivy league degrees, no connections or legacy to any of the "elite" privates. We work hard to make a good living but don't have the network to pull strings to get us in places.

We value education and are interested in private schools that offer academic rigor. We are unlikely to get into any TT privates, especially given how competitive it has been this last year. I am of the opinion that we should just focus on trying our best for 5-6 TTs, if it doesn't work out, great, we'll just go with our excellent public school. My husband thinks we should apply more broadly to 2T schools as well (his work network are overwhelmingly private school parents, and seem to be horrified by the idea of their kids going public), but I don't see the value in spending the same amount of tuition money on a less rigorous school. At least with public, there are certain benchmarks that must be met, and we can use the money we save on tuition for outside enrichment if needed.

Does this strategy make sense? Are there benefits 2T schools have over public that I am missing? One big factor seems to be class size, but our public is close to meeting the 20 child/class mandate in the next couple of years, so I'm not too worried about, and many of the less competitive privates seem to be increasing their class sizes to the point where there's not a meaningful difference from a good public.

[Anonymous]

What public?

I would probably stick with public. But it doesn't hurt to at least start the private process so that you have all of your options open. Go on tours and become better educated about the schools and give yourself the option of applying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What public?

I would probably stick with public. But it doesn't hurt to at least start the private process so that you have all of your options open. Go on tours and become better educated about the schools and give yourself the option of applying.

Don't want to dox myself, but it's one that has great test scores and PTA involvement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What public?

I would probably stick with public. But it doesn't hurt to at least start the private process so that you have all of your options open. Go on tours and become better educated about the schools and give yourself the option of applying.

Don't want to dox myself, but it's one that has great test scores and PTA involvement.

Totally understand. Manhattan (that is vague enough)?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What public?

I would probably stick with public. But it doesn't hurt to at least start the private process so that you have all of your options open. Go on tours and become better educated about the schools and give yourself the option of applying.

Don't want to dox myself, but it's one that has great test scores and PTA involvement.

Totally understand. Manhattan (that is vague enough)?

Yes! Generally regarded as the "best" in our district.

[Anonymous]

Hard to say until you go on tours and have more information as to what feels like it may be a fit for your child and family. There isn't as much difference between "TT" and "2T," as you may be led to believe here, especially in the elementary years. And anyone who is "horrified" by the well-regarded public schools in the city doesn't have an opinion worth considering. Also, don't rule out the private K-8s . . . it's a great model, particularly for middle school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hard to say until you go on tours and have more information as to what feels like it may be a fit for your child and family. There isn't as much difference between "TT" and "2T," as you may be led to believe here, especially in the elementary years. And anyone who is "horrified" by the well-regarded public schools in the city doesn't have an opinion worth considering. Also, don't rule out the private K-8s . . . it's a great model, particularly for middle school.

Tell me about it... maybe horrified is too strong a word, but they seem to generally feel that private overall is higher quality than public.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Does this strategy make sense?

Getting into TT private isn't something you do overnight, it is planned out over multiple years. I don't really know what preschool you are in and whether your child is competitive.

Anonymous wrote:
One big factor seems to be class size, but our public is close to meeting the 20 child/class mandate in the next couple of years, so I'm not too worried about, and many of the less competitive privates seem to be increasing their class sizes to the point where there's not a meaningful difference from a good public.

You are assuming it will have a positive impact rather than negative. Real estate is limited at public schools. Are they going to limit the amount of child who get in, will they have classes in the gym, will they ask for an exception and continue as is, etc...

Anonymous wrote:
My husband thinks we should apply more broadly to 2T schools as well (his work network are overwhelmingly private school parents, and seem to be horrified by the idea of their kids going public)

Your husband might think he is the equivalent of his colleagues, but it might not be the case as many come from wealthy families.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hard to say until you go on tours and have more information as to what feels like it may be a fit for your child and family. There isn't as much difference between "TT" and "2T," as you may be led to believe here, especially in the elementary years. And anyone who is "horrified" by the well-regarded public schools in the city doesn't have an opinion worth considering. Also, don't rule out the private K-8s . . . it's a great model, particularly for middle school.

Tell me about it... maybe horrified is too strong a word, but they seem to generally feel that private overall is higher quality than public.

I have been through the NYC school process with two kids, K and HS. My first word of advice to anyone just starting out is to focus on what's best for your family and children and not to worry about what others think.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Does this strategy make sense?

Getting into TT private isn't something you do overnight, it is planned out over multiple years. I don't really know what preschool you are in and whether your child is competitive.

Anonymous wrote:
One big factor seems to be class size, but our public is close to meeting the 20 child/class mandate in the next couple of years, so I'm not too worried about, and many of the less competitive privates seem to be increasing their class sizes to the point where there's not a meaningful difference from a good public.

You are assuming it will have a positive impact rather than negative. Real estate is limited at public schools. Are they going to limit the amount of child who get in, will they have classes in the gym, will they ask for an exception and continue as is, etc...

Anonymous wrote:
My husband thinks we should apply more broadly to 2T schools as well (his work network are overwhelmingly private school parents, and seem to be horrified by the idea of their kids going public)

Your husband might think he is the equivalent of his colleagues, but it might not be the case as many come from wealthy families.

You didn't answer any of my questions though? I'm aware that we're unlikely to get into a TT private, it was literally in my first sentence. What is the value of a 2T private over an excellent public?

I have looked into the issues you raised about our public school and have spoken to a PTA member at the school, and I am satisfied with the answers given. They are likely to reach the class size mandate by 2028 without any space issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hard to say until you go on tours and have more information as to what feels like it may be a fit for your child and family. There isn't as much difference between "TT" and "2T," as you may be led to believe here, especially in the elementary years. And anyone who is "horrified" by the well-regarded public schools in the city doesn't have an opinion worth considering. Also, don't rule out the private K-8s . . . it's a great model, particularly for middle school.

Tell me about it... maybe horrified is too strong a word, but they seem to generally feel that private overall is higher quality than public.

We sent kid/s in 9th to Big 3/5 TT DC privates from …. gasp … public school ES and MS. To the surprise of no one, child is near top of class and no problem with transition. Glad we made the decisions we did and child really challenged in high school in a way the public school peers are not. BUT, the idea that the private school elite elementary school kids have some advantage (academically) was not our l experience. Our little neighborhood school was filled with enough HYPSM types and rich folks to satisfy us that their peer group from the neighborhood wasn’t exactly pulling them down.

Generally our experience was that kids who got sent to private from our local neighborhood cohort had some sort of learning issue that prevented them from doing well in a regular classroom. And I don’t mean necessarily a formal diagnosis. Just that both they and their parents needed some hand holding.

I think you’ll find at particularly 2T privates it’s a lot of kids from sucky neighborhood schools (aka their parents couldn’t afford your TT neighborhood school and private was cheaper) who needed an out; kids with problems at their excellent public school who needed an out; and religious types who are true believers. Our child was surrounded by bright enthusiastic peers and a good system and accomplished the learning they needed to and love of school we wanted at that age.

[Anonymous]

Your husband needs a new job with new colleagues. It sounds like he or both of you do pretty well if paying for private is no issue but his colleagues sound like miserable, pretentious, know-it-alls. Based on what you have written you sound more reasonable and grounded.

You only have so much bandwidth but I agree with others not to be obsessed with the alleged tiers. You are paying a lot of money so exmissions and things like that are definitely worth considering. But if a 2T school really strikes your fancy, don't worry about what the idiots at work say.

That being said I would still probably do public, though I agree that you need to really get to know the school and not just base it on rankings and test scores. Are you truly guaranteed an in zone seat with the changes? Are there any other changes expected?

Also agree with others that I am curious what nursery school you are at. Will they be able to help with the private process? Do they think your child has a chance of getting in? Where do they think your child would do best and thrive?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hard to say until you go on tours and have more information as to what feels like it may be a fit for your child and family. There isn't as much difference between "TT" and "2T," as you may be led to believe here, especially in the elementary years. And anyone who is "horrified" by the well-regarded public schools in the city doesn't have an opinion worth considering. Also, don't rule out the private K-8s . . . it's a great model, particularly for middle school.

Tell me about it... maybe horrified is too strong a word, but they seem to generally feel that private overall is higher quality than public.

We sent kid/s in 9th to Big 3/5 TT DC privates from …. gasp … public school ES and MS. To the surprise of no one, child is near top of class and no problem with transition. Glad we made the decisions we did and child really challenged in high school in a way the public school peers are not. BUT, the idea that the private school elite elementary school kids have some advantage (academically) was not our l experience. Our little neighborhood school was filled with enough HYPSM types and rich folks to satisfy us that their peer group from the neighborhood wasn’t exactly pulling them down.

Generally our experience was that kids who got sent to private from our local neighborhood cohort had some sort of learning issue that prevented them from doing well in a regular classroom. And I don’t mean necessarily a formal diagnosis. Just that both they and their parents needed some hand holding.

I think you’ll find at particularly 2T privates it’s a lot of kids from sucky neighborhood schools (aka their parents couldn’t afford your TT neighborhood school and private was cheaper) who needed an out; kids with problems at their excellent public school who needed an out; and religious types who are true believers. Our child was surrounded by bright enthusiastic peers and a good system and accomplished the learning they needed to and love of school we wanted at that age.

You are writing about DC. NYC is very different. My child went to a very good public in NYC then switched to a 2T private. There were plenty of very bright, well-adjusted kids from very successful families who had been at the private since K. And some of the types of kids you mentioned. I'm glad we made the choice we did but I could see why other families chose differently.

[Anonymous]

As somebody who's posted here a bunch of times about switching my kid from Fieldston to a top public: take the public, a good public school is going to be superior to a 2T private both academically and socially. The main reason to prefer private would be if, as other people have mentioned, your child has special issues or you need a lot of extra hand-holding in some way, though even there in a lot of cases the public may be more willing to help.

Outside enrichment is a great idea, but I would encourage you to look beyond RSM/Kumon or whatever and not limit yourself to academic enrichment. A rigorous Suzuki violin school - and kindergarten is a perfect age to start - will do far more to develop your child's brain than extra math, not just for the music theory but also because the process and the struggle of mastering an instrument helps develop some amazing skills for later in life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your husband needs a new job with new colleagues. It sounds like he or both of you do pretty well if paying for private is no issue but his colleagues sound like miserable, pretentious, know-it-alls. Based on what you have written you sound more reasonable and grounded.

You only have so much bandwidth but I agree with others not to be obsessed with the alleged tiers. You are paying a lot of money so exmissions and things like that are definitely worth considering. But if a 2T school really strikes your fancy, don't worry about what the idiots at work say.

That being said I would still probably do public, though I agree that you need to really get to know the school and not just base it on rankings and test scores. Are you truly guaranteed an in zone seat with the changes? Are there any other changes expected?

Also agree with others that I am curious what nursery school you are at. Will they be able to help with the private process? Do they think your child has a chance of getting in? Where do they think your child would do best and thrive?

Thanks! Many of his colleagues' kids are at 2T schools, and they are generally the most status obsessed of the lot, so take from that what you will. The TT parents seem more normal than the rest.

While our public is small, the zone is quite small too. They have generally given offers to all in-zone kids in the past few years but of course there are never any guarantees.

We are at a small preschool which does provide exmissions help, however it's not a known feeder. We chose it over two feeders which gave us weird vibes.