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I'm a SAHM and we have a new 2 year old and expecting a second in July and wondering when would be a good time to start the oldest at school? I've heard it's a bad idea to start school soon after a new baby is born because the oldest can feel abandoned.
So I would think the earliest would be Fall 2027 a couple a dayys a week for a few hours? If you didn't need full day for childcare what schedule did you dind work for preschool? And is it true about the oldest feeling abandoned? |
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1st child—5 mornings a week for Pre-K 3 and 4
2nd child—2 mornings a week for Pre-K3, 5 mornings a week for Pre-K4 Older child was excited for preschool (though started when younger child was 9 months old, not a newborn). |
We had a FT nanny and we sent all our kids at 18 months - two half days a week 9-1130. When they are 2.5 we upped it to 4 half days. We then moved them to their private school which starts with primary 1 (3 yrs), so 5 days 9-2. It increases again until K which is a full day |
| The abandonment thing is not universal and wasn't true for my kids. It was great for my DD to get social time with peers and for me to get time with just the baby. She did 2 days a week at 2.5. |
| My child did a coop playgroup for 3 hours a day 2x weekly from age 2-3 and then started half day preschool 3x a week at age 3. |
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My kids did nothing formal ages 0-3. At age 4, they each went 3 mornings a week, then started public K at age 5.
With the second kid, though, we did Free Forest School (essentially a weekly group play date in the woods, with parents present) at age 3. |
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Kid 1 & 2 (twins): 1/2 days 4 days per week ages 3 & 4
Kid 3: 1/2 days 5 days per week age 4 only (we made a cross country move when he was 3 & with waitlists etc he ended up starting later) |
| Half day program, 2 days a week at age 3 and 3 days a week at age 4. |
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I would do fall/winter 2026. Not all kids feel abandoned, and July to November is a long time to a toddler so it won't feel like it's happening right away. At 2.5 or almost 3, your older child will be at an age to really benefit from peer interaction and the activities that are tailored to his age.
Consider nap schedule-- it's not actually that fun for a 2.5yo to be tied to a newborn's nap schedule, and it'll limit what you can do for activities and enrichments. Your kid might be really happy to do fun and interesting things with the "big kids" while baby takes yet another boring nap. Your days and hours will likely be set by the program you choose. |
| Mine did not want to be separated from me at 2.5. We ended up pulling our oldest out and trying again at 3.5 with better luck. With the youngest we didn’t even try until 3.5. |
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I would do half days starting at 3, but if your preschool is willing to have the kids nap there so you pick up at 3:30 or something, that can be a big help to you. It's very hard when you have a two-napping baby and a one-napping preschooler and their naptimes are opposites. Someone's nap is always being compromised by the timing of preschool pickup. We were a lot happier with our 3yo napping at school on her school days.
With two kids, of course consider their development and attachment and everything, but logistics are suddenly a HUGE deal. |
| Anything before 3 years old is daycare. Most kids start preschool at 3 years old. Mine went five half days a week. |
As a mom who prioritized naps over just about everything else, I agree with the pp. DD1 started a morning program 3x a week when she was 3 and DD2 was 1.5. DD2 favored an early 2nd nap that was often interrupted by DD1’s pickup. I HATED that. But we got through it. The next year DD1 was in full day prek and DD2 was back to uninterrupted 2nd naps. They are now both in middle school and DD1 recently told me that some of her earliest memories are of that program. She loved it at the time and has really sweet memories of it now, so I’m glad we made it work. |
| DC1 had half day from age 3-5, then full day kindergarten at a Montessori school. DC2 was similar except pandemic hit in the middle, so he had to transfer to public school online kindergarten. If it’s just daycare for social purpose, half day is good enough, but still suggest to start at 3. |
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Age 4 3x a week from 9-2.
I might have considered 2x a week for her when she was 3 but I was part of an active moms group and didn’t feel the need. |